Michael Scott Quotes from The Office (page 8)

Regional manager of Dunder Mifflin Scranton, World's Best Boss.

12,176 quotes · page 8 of 122

1. Alright, so let's get this party staaaarrrrted.

   Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2128

2. Um, guys, where you going? Pam, show's just getting started.

   Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2132

3. And now... to someone who quietly goes about their job, but always seems to land the biggest accounts...

   Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2136

4. ...the 'Busiest Beaver' award goes to Phyllis Lapin.

   Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2137

5. Yeah, way to go Phyllis. Nice work, per usual.

   Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2138

6. What? I told them busiest...idiots.

   Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2140

7. Well, we'll fix it up. You don't have to display that.

   Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2142

8. Herro everybodeeee. I'm gonna cwall Jan Revinson-Gould.

   Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2150

9. Oh, dat wir be fwar. Ah, me so horny.

   Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2158

10. Right? You know wat I'm talking 'bout.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2159

11. This next award goes to somebody, who really, lights up the office.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2161

12. Somebody, who I think a lot of us, cannot keep, from checking out. The 'Hottest in the Office' award goes to... ...Ryan the temp!

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2162

13. Yeah. 'Hidy ho, you sexy thang. You sexy thang you.' Here you go.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2163

14. And the 'Tight Ass' award goes to Angela. Not only because she is everybody's favorite stickler, but because she has, a great caboose. So...come on down.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2165

15. The 'Spicy Curry' award goes to our very own Kelly Kapoor! Get on up here. Here you go.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2170

16. Um, not everything means something, it's just a joke.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2172

17. I don't know, it's just...

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2174

18. I know. It's ju- they didn't have any more businessmen. So...

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2176

19. Just sit down Kelly.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2178

20. It's so freakin' hot in there. Now I know what Bob Hope was going through when he performed in Saudi Arabia. Man! I got Dwight sucking the funny out of the room, but you do what you can do. Here we go, he's early with the cue. Here we go.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2179

21. 'You have won a tiny Dundie.'

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2180

22. Hey, thanks guys. Hey, where you guys from?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2182

23. Oh, alright, yeah.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2184

24. Uh, you know what guys, we're just having a little office party, so if you want, uh...

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2186

25. Hey, you know, cool it guys, really-

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2187

26. Let's cut it.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2189

27. I had a few more Dundies to, uh, give out tonight, but, I'm just going to cut it short. And wrap it up so everybody can enjoy their food. Um...thanks for listening, those who listened. This last Dundie is for Kevin, this is the 'Don't Go in There After Me' award. It's for the time that I went into the bathroom after him, and it was really, really smelly. So...

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2190

28. [give Kevin his award]There you go.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2191

29. Alright, alright, alright, okay. Alright, we'll keep rolling. Okay, this is the fine work award. This goes to Stanley, for all the fine work he did this year.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2199

30. You know you did.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2201

31. And this next award is going out to our own little Pam Beesley...

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2205

32. ...I think we all know what award Pam is going to be getting this year.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2206

33. It is the 'Whitest Sneakers' award! Because she always has the whitest tennis shoes on!

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2207

34. Get on down here! Pam Beesley ladies and gentlemen! Oh, here we go.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2208

35. Pam Beesley ladies and gentleman. Oh! Thank you.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2213

36. Was this year's Dundies a success? Well, let's see, I made Pam laugh so hard, that she fell out of her chair, and she almost broke her neck. So I killed, almost.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2231

37. Great work tonight.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2238

38. Excellent.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2240

39. Yes, that too, but I mean with the audio. Great work.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2242

40. TMI. Too much information. I used to say, 'Don't go there,' but that is so lame now. Or, 'You go, girl.' Or... Um, when did 'Where's the beef?' That was, like, a long, long time ago. It's funny how the shelf life of these things, like how long they last, like, 'Too much information' probably came on the scene... I mean, I didn't hear it till, like, this month, so it's pretty recently. Um, but you know, they're generally good for, like, no more than five or six years.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2253

41. All right, we need something for Kevin.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2258

42. What do we know about him? He's an accountant.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2260

43. He's fat. The fat accountant award.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2262

44. I am the fat accountant.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2265

45. Here he is.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2267

46. Really? What did they say? 'For a good time, call Michael Scott'?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2269

47. Why do you think that? You just immediately go to that, Dwight? Why are you so negative? Why...

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2272

48. I mean, you just come in and you're just negative...

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2274

49. ...and you just walk negatively.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2276

50. Do you want me to find out what it says?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2277

51. Yes.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2278

52. What does that even mean? What are you... What are you talking about?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2280

53. Just go and find out what it says and who said it and report back to me. But don't tell anybody that I have anything to do with it because if they ask me, I will say that you are crazy.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2282

54. Thank you. You won't regret this, Michael.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2283

55. I hadn't planned on including him.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2285

56. Kevin.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2287

57. Well, what should I do, guys? Seriously, do you want me to just cancel the Dundies?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2295

58. Ping? Everybody loves Ping. He's my most popular character.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2297

59. Really? Well, he is based on the Chinese delivery guy that I have, who talks exactly like that, so, I think you should take it up with him instead of me.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2299

60. Well, neither of you are Chinese, so what... Why do you care?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2301

61. What?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2317

62. Dwight, you've hit a new low here.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2321

63. That is a good point.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2324

64. Okay, all right, I will do that. I will get to that definitely. Absolutely.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2326

65. Oh, I don't know. Maybe after I finish writing, producing, directing, and hosting your awards show. All right, just relax, keep your pants on. Unless, of course, you're in the bathroom and you should be able to take your pants off in that case without Creepsville Central spying on you. Good.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2328

66. Here we go. And that. Hey. How you doing?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2331

67. You down with the Dundies?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2332

68. You down with the Dundies?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2334

69. You down with the Dundies? You're all my homies

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2336

70. You down with the Dundies?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2338

71. Yeah, all the homies

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2340

72. I have listened to that song so many times and I still don't know what OPP stands for. Other people's... Something. I...

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2341

73. All right, our next award... ah, yes, this award goes to the most creative writing on the ladies' room wall, and the winner is... Who is it? Who wants to claim it? Shiny Dundie. Who wrote it? Great idea, Dwight.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2345

74. He's hot, all right? What do you want me to do about it?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2347

75. It was unanimous, Toby.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2349

76. Well, okay, I based it on what I felt was unanimous office sentiment, and this isn't even about what Ryan thinks. It's about you. It's about how you feel about the Dundies. Admit it.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2351

77. Yes, it is true.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2353

78. Okay, I don't have time for this. I need to get on stage and you are breaking my concentration. Me Chief Michael Scott. Here to trade...

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2355

79. Don't wanna forget that.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2391

80. Absolutely. Is this mine or is this Chili's?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2393

81. Keep it. My gift. Thank you. Have a good night. See you next year.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Line 2395

82. Hey, what's up?

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2397

83. Any emails today?

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2399

84. No? Um... Check your spam folder.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2401

85. What?

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2403

86. [laughs uncontrollably]

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2405

87. Kay.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2407

88. I am king of forwards. It's how I like to do business, everybody joking around. We're like 'Friends'. I am Chandler and Joey and, uh, Pam is Rachel. And Dwight is Kramer.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2409

89. That's funny! That's funny. Not offensive. Uh... because it's nature. Educational.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2411

90. Um, I...

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2413

91. Yeah... maybe. Maybe. Well, we'll see. Because I... I don't know if it's... Whup! Come on! Hey!

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2415

92. Kay! Oh, you are so bad! Yeah!

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2417

93. Oh, Boom! Bam! Oh, this guy is out of control! He is a madman! Better get the bleep button ready for him.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2419

94. Uh oh.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2421

95. Uh oh! Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho-o!

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2423

96. Todd Packer and I are total BFF. Best Friends Forever. He and I came up together as salesmen. One time, we were out and we met this set of twins. And Packer told them that we were brothers. And so, you know, one thing led to another, and we brought em back to the motel. And then Packer did both of them. It was awesome. So...

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2424

97. Oh-whoa-oh! Oh! Okay. Grade 'A' gossip for you, right now. Randall, CFO, resigned. Nobody knows why.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2425

98. Really? Here we go! Buckle up. It's going to be a bumpy one!

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2427

99. Oh, yeah.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2429

100. Well, to be fair... blondes, brunettes, you know, there's a lot of dumb people out there.

     Season 2 · Episode 2 · Line 2431