Michael Scott Quotes from The Office (page 10)

Regional manager of Dunder Mifflin Scranton, World's Best Boss.

12,176 quotes · page 10 of 122

  1. Yes. Yes. Final walkthrough.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2745

  2. Sign the papers at the condo.

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  3. Uh, I don't need one.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2749

  4. I don't need a representative.

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  5. No, No.

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  6. No. Dwight. I'm fine.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2755

  7. Well, this isn't about work. This is closing on a condo, it's completely personal.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2757

  8. Except that, this is about my living arrangement, and as boss, I need to have a living arrangement in order to do work.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2759

  9. Ok. Fine. Yes, you can come.

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  10. As my associate.

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  11. No it is not.

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  12. Oh, most honorable Pamera. Not offensive, because that's the way they talk in movies.

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  13. We are. Dwight and I are going to the big thing. So why don't you have everybody work on their expense reports and I'd like them in by the end of the day.

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  14. Very good.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2771

  15. We will. Um, did you do the thing I asked you to do about the magazines?

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  16. Good. The Small Business Man?

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  17. Maxim? American Way? Cracked?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2777

  18. How about, uh, Fine Arts? Aficionado Monthly?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2779

  19. NO, well can you get on that, because I don't just read Cracked. Thank you.

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  20. Ok. See you soon.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2783

  21. I don't know, regular. Normal ones. Nothing fancy. Not my style. What are you doing?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2785

  22. What? No, Dwight. It's fifty degrees outside. Don't... please...

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2787

  23. I... Just... Would you put it up? Ok. Fine. Just leave it down. Whiner.

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  24. I do not understand what you spend your money on.

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  25. Home, sweet home.

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  26. Right there. My sanctuary. My party pad. Someday I can just see my grandkids learning how to walk out here. Hang a swing from this tree. Push them back... wait... no, it's this one, right here. Home, sweet home.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2819

  27. Oh, how are you? Nice to meet you, Bill. Bill. Mr. Bill. OHHH NOOO. MR. BILL. OHHH! SNL? When they pull him apart? He'd always get rolled over by something.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2822

  28. Nice to meet you too.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2824

  29. Yeah, small. I'm buying it and I'm not renting it. So, it's still an upgrade. He doesn't know anything about property ownership. Kind of an idiot. Um.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2826

  30. Oh. Good. That's good. It's good to be accommodating of that.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2832

  31. This, my friends, is the master bedroom. Check out the cathedral ceilings. Those are like seventeen feet high. We have cable readiness. Right there. I am going to totally pimp this place out. I am going to put a surround sound system. I am going to put a plasma screen right against this wall.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2837

  32. I'm putting my bed right over here.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2839

  33. Well, then I will get a warrantee.

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  34. Well then I won't get a warrantee.

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  35. So that's the problem, is solved. What?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2845

  36. Uh... Ten year.

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  37. What? Wha? You said ten.

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  38. Ok, ok, ok.

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  39. Alright.

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  40. Ok. Alright. Oh boy.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2864

  41. Um. Oh. Oh, ok. Is that suppose to come off?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2867

  42. Um. I'm going to take a little breather for a second. Excuse me.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2870

  43. Oh, man.

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  44. Uh.

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  45. The ceilings are lower than they were last week. That, I don't... I don't...

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  46. ...know if you showed me this same unit or not.

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  47. Where are all the hot people? I was told that there would be all these attractive singles.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2889

  48. As far as I can tell, I'm the best-looking person here.

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  49. There's a basic principle in real estate, that you should never be the best-looking person in the development. It's just sorta common sense, because if you are, then you've no place to go but down.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2892

  50. No, no, no.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2894

  51. I am not going to rent the third bedroom. I want a price reduction or I am a-walkin.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2896

  52. Ehhhh....

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2898

  53. I made the right decision. I'm glad I signed. I'm a homeowner. Right? Good to be a homeowner. Diversifying. This is good. This is fun. We're having fun.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2899

  54. There's something else Dwight wanted to talk to you about. I have a surprise for you, for helping me out today.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2912

  55. No, no. I insist. I insist. Because you've really done some great work. Great work. And that is why, I am going to let you move into my third bedroom and pay me rent.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2914

  56. Why did I do it? Because I believe in rewarding people for their efforts. Ah. I rewarded Dwight with the room, and he is rewarding me back, ah, with $500 plus utilities.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2915

  57. I'm thinking, lock into a four year commitment, we'll go month to month after that. Or, until I start dating, have a girlfriend, then you're, you know, you're gone.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2917

  58. What the hell is a terrarium?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2919

  59. Oh, so an aquarium. Ah, that will not come into this place.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2921

  60. We take separate cars.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2935

  61. Why would we do that?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2937

  62. No.

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  63. EHHHHNT. Game over. Offer revoked. Dwight. I'm sorry, but you reach out and you try to be a nice guy, and help out a friend, and this is what happens. This is what I get. Oh god. I'm ... Ok.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2941

  64. Yeah, well, you know what? Nobody cares about your stupid beet farm. Beets are the worst.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2955

  65. Nobody likes beets.

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  66. Nobody likes beets, Dwight. Why don't you grow something that everybody does like? You should grow candy. I'd love a piece of candy right now. Not a beet.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2959

  67. Stop it!

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2961

  68. Yeah. Jim. Slim Jim. What's going... What's going on?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2983

  69. Oh. Thanks. Thanks. It's very cool. It's a three bedroom, gay-friendly.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2985

  70. You know.

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  71. Really?

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  72. What's this?

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  73. I don't really know what to say. Um, I'm not one for making speeches, but ah, my heart is very full at this moment.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2992

  74. Get up here, Dwight.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2994

  75. Yep, not as good as gold. Why are you playing the national anthem?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2996

  76. Oh. What the hell is that?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 2998

  77. Oh, okay. I'll tell you. Let's see here. Three bedroom, two bath...

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  78. ...contemporary townhouse. Two car parking...

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  79. ...wall-to-wall carpets...

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  80. ...all fixtures included. Yes, this is... This is looking good.

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  81. I think it does.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3034

  82. Yes.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3036

  83. I think it has a... Yeah, it has a deck. They call it a porch, but it has a deck.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3038

  84. When a man is laying on his deathbed there are four things that go through his mind. Was I well-loved? Check. Did I express myself? Did I let my light shine through? Check. Will an attractive woman cry at my funeral? Check. Probably more than one. Check. Check, check, check, check. Lastly, did I achieve success and own real estate? And when I close on this condo, I will be able to check that one as well.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3039

  85. Home owner. About to join an exclusive club, Dwight. Maybe some day these people out here will know what that feels like. Maybe not. Who knows? Not my problem.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3050

  86. Are we ready?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3052

  87. Are we gonna do it?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3054

  88. This is all mine. All the way down around the corner. It's a shared space, but I can use it whenever I want to,

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3055

  89. Ah, the volunteer Sheriff station.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3057

  90. No.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3059

  91. Oh, anything bad?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3061

  92. Mmm-hmm.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3063

  93. Mmm-hmm.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3065

  94. No.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3067

  95. I don't need a gun.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3069

  96. Hello! How are you? I'm, uh, just about to close on 126 over there and I guess we're going to be neighbors. Very cool, very cool. So, uh, so what's the vibe? What's the vibe of this place?

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3071

  97. Oh... That's gonna change.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3073

  98. Because I loves to party and I'm gonna be partying my butt out at this place.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3075

  99. Here's a question for you. I have a convertible. Is it safe that park that in my driveway. All right. See you soon. Good guy. Um, cool.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3081

  100. I think I'm going to make myself some microwave popcorn. Press 'Popcorn.' Oh, that's gonna be delicious. I just love having popcorn in the middle of the afternoon. You know what? I could do with some hot chocolate as well. Oh, drat. I can't make hot chocolate and popcorn at the same time, unless, I can. Boom! Second microwave for le hot chocolat.

    Season 2 · Episode 3 · Line 3089