Michael Scott Quotes from The Office (page 90)

Regional manager of Dunder Mifflin Scranton, World's Best Boss.

12,176 quotes · page 90 of 122

1. Look who you're talking to.

   Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31258

2. Well I would say that my greatest talent is being the best man, woman, or child, to have ever run this branch, ever.

   Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31260

3. Permission to speak on the record?

   Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31262

4. Jim is like Big Bird. He is tall and yellow and very nice. But would I put him in charge? No, I don't think so. Because Big Bird doesn't make the tough decisions. I... If I was gonna put someone in charge, I would put Burt in charge or I would put one of the real grown-ups in charge, like Maria or Gordon, maybe.

   Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31264

5. Very much, Jim is my best friend. But it's his performance report... right here. Now this was written by Toby, who we all know is extremely reliable.

   Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31266

6. It's not very well written, but you get the gist.

   Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31268

7. I can just continue to run it myself.

   Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31270

8. This was Jim's idea?

   Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31272

9. Wow. Ummm, well I'd have to talk to my mother and my guy at H and R Block.

   Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31274

10. I can't help but feel partially responsible.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31279

11. Little pick me up? Oh those are the best. Little sugar rush.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31280

12. Well we did talk about how handsome you are.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31282

13. Oh what a week, God. We said... I know there were certain things we said...

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31284

14. Hmmm, that's weird, that's weird... it's kinda weirding me out. Did you know that Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31286

15. Tell you what, when you leave this office I am going to call Wallace and I am going to tell him that you should get that promotion.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31288

16. Yes!

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31290

17. Yes.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31292

18. Hey David, this is Michael Scott. Michael Scott here.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31308

19. Just wanted to talk to you about Jim Halpert. I understand that he did not receive the promotion. And I wanted to see what I could do to nudge you in the right direction.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31310

20. Absolutely, not. Like I said before, Jim is fantastic and he deserves this job.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31312

21. Wha... here's the thing, Jim is the best man for this job, I think you should give it to him.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31314

22. Well, nnnn, that... that was an anomaly. That file had been falsified. Toby Flenderson is doing drugs.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31316

23. Hey, hey Jim, it would make me feel really good right now if you would just punch me in the face. Alright, Just do it.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31334

24. I never recommended you because I didn't want to lose you and I didn't want to lose Pam, and now I don't wanna lose the baby.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31336

25. That's what she...

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31338

26. Kind of in the middle of something here.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31341

27. I, yeah... no, I'll tell him myself. Let's both.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31343

28. Hello.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31344

29. No, it's just us.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31346

30. Oh, oh, well here he is right now. Come in.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31348

31. Well just as long as it means Jim becomes a manager.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31351

32. I like that, so manager and co-manager.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31354

33. Well that might be a little confusing for people because they know me as manager.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31356

34. Okay everybody, I have an announcement to make... whoa do you have an announcement?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31359

35. Everybody, David Wallace and I have talked and we have decided to promote Jim to the position of co-manager.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31361

36. Of your butt, and your butt, and your butt, all of the Scranton branch butts.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31363

37. What's happening to me? I am also being promoted to co-manager, we will be co-managers together. Jim Halpert, welcome.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31365

38. No way, no how. Expense reports are a day-to-day item. That is Jim's now. I am exclusively big picture, epic.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31385

39. That is not big picture.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31392

40. ... Okay.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31394

41. That is not-- okay-- that is day-to-day.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31396

42. You're trying to trick me.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31398

43. Get out, get out, get out, get out, get out.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31400

44. Everyone, now would be a good time to freshen up, because I'd like everyone to meet in the conference room in five minutes. And I suggest that you bring a snack, because we may be in there for a while.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31420

45. Yes?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31422

46. Mmm, sure, but could I first talk to you in my office?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31424

47. Welcome.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31428

48. Mm-hmm.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31430

49. Disruptive.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31432

50. No, I don't think they are. I think the meetings are very important.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31434

51. Let's do.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31436

52. N-- well, to be fair, Jim... James... Jimothy... To be fair, Jimothy, the-- ah, that sounds weird. Are you okay with being called Jim?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31438

53. Alright. Jim, to be fair, the conversation wasn't about planets...

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31440

54. At first, we were talking about introducing a line of toilet paper. And what part of the human body does one use toilet paper upon? So you draw a line from there to the other planets, and I think by the end, we all learned a little bit about how small we are.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31442

55. Because it's a big universe, and we're all just little, tiny specks of dust.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31444

56. You know what eats a large amount of the day are naps. You go to sleep, it's light out, you wake up, it's dark. That's the whole day. Where did that day go? I have no idea.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31446

57. Yes.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31448

58. Alright. No more meetings this week.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31450

59. I can be very suprising.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31452

60. Mm-hmm?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31464

61. Yeah, just focus-grouping a product expansion idea to these folks. Got one of each.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31466

62. Stanley, you don't need to answer that.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31468

63. What do you mean by 'these people'?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31472

64. Oh, hey, everybody, I think that Jim has gone insane, because he thinks that my office is a conference room.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31474

65. Listen, Jim, no offense, but when push comes to shove, what I want is more important that what you want.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31476

66. What do you guys think?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31478

67. No, no, no, you don't need to go anywhere. Anything that Jim has to say to me, he can say in front of these types of people.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31480

68. That is not what Wallace told us.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31482

69. That is not the way I heard it.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31484

70. It is one thing, me giving you the co-manager title. It is another thing, you bossing me around.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31486

71. No, no, no. No, we will not call David Wallace. I will call David Wallace.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31488

72. Or David Wallace will call us on line two. Why don't we just--

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31490

73. Hey David, this is Michael, senior co-manager.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31492

74. Got it, Dave. Sounds like your classice big-picture decision.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31494

75. Which is it more of?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31497

76. I thought maybe we could talk after this is over.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31501

77. No, it will not be. I am on top of it.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31504

78. Talk to you later-- Okay, you didn't let me say good-bye. Alright, I am looking forward to this.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31507

79. I hate the fact that we have to do this together. I think we work better separately. When I am irritated and I look at you, I don't see you anymore.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31509

80. All I can see is how big and gross the pores on your nose are.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31511

81. You know, there's no easy way to do this. I say we add 1.5% to their paychecks and don't say anything about it.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31515

82. No, we can do it during the day. It doesn't have to be that dramatic, Jim.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31517

83. Jim, don't take this the wrong way. Are you gonna take this the wrong way?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31519

84. You use your brain too much.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31521

85. Sometimes the smartest people don't think at all.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31523

86. As I was saying it.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31525

87. Con-- you look like a nerd.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31527

88. Pro-- you get to share your pros and cons list with the other nerds.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31529

89. Con-- you unzip your pants, and you find that there's a calculator down there.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31531

90. That will not go over well.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31544

91. Oh, my God! Are you gonna make another pro and con list? I'm gonna kill myself.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31546

92. No! I could not do that, Jim. I can see it in your crusty little eyes that you are going to make everything perfect. If I can just think this through, if I could just think it exactly right, I can make this perfect, and then I can go down every avenue, and every avenue off of that avenue, and then another avenue.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31548

93. And then another--

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31550

94. Oh, I do?! Tell me what they are.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31552

95. Ha! That-- I am not known for that!

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31554

96. Yes! You went over my head to Wallace!

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31556

97. Okay. Well, why don't you tell me what those are, Jim? Why don't you enliven me?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31558

98. Ah.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31560

99. Okay, here's a tough decision for you. You suck! You suck! Is that clear enough for you?!

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31562

100. Okay, Skippy, here we go. Why don't you run yourself out there and tell them? You call it.

     Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31564