thedundies.com

Michael Scott Quotes from The Office (page 87)

Regional manager of Dunder Mifflin Scranton, World's Best Boss.

12,176 quotes · page 87 of 122

  1. I like her. I think that she is a fast learner. Cons, she doesn't always follow through. Sh--New York and the whole art school thing. And Roy. She has a weird voice.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30144

  2. I don't need to tell you that.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30146

  3. I don't think you are being totally impartial though, because you haven't said one bad thing about Pam.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30148

  4. Okay. So be it, then you've lost credibility. And I'm going to go with my guy, and that's Ryan.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30150

  5. Oh, wow! Whoa!

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30152

  6. Ho-ho, man! Wow. Honey! I want you to bring the garbage out. 'Cause I'm not going to have sex with you unless you bring out the garba--

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30154

  7. I have a very difficult decision to make. It's like last week I was at the video store. Do I rent Devil Wears Prada again? Or do I finally get around to seeing Sophie's Choice? It is what you would call a classic difficult decision.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30155

  8. Pam, can you come in here, please? Have a seat. Well, there's no easy way of saying this. So I think I will just...drag it out. Since the dawn of time there has been--

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30168

  9. I gave Ryan the sales job. There just weren't enough clients for the two of you. So I had to--

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30170

  10. I'm sorry, sorry.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30172

  11. Yes, you did.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30174

  12. Yep.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30176

  13. No, you--no.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30178

  14. No, you're the best person for the job. You're going to be great.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30180

  15. Oh, oh!

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30182

  16. You should have seen your face. Oh man! Oh, that was classic.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30184

  17. Oh, really?

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30186

  18. Oh, man. That was really good. That was really good.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30188

  19. I don't know, I offered him his temp job back. We'll see. He was not happy at all when I offered him this job and then I told him he didn't get the job, so--

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30190

  20. I don't appreciate you telling me what to do. So clean out your desk, you are through here.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30192

  21. Oh! What's our receptionists name?

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30194

  22. Could you send her in?

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30196

  23. Hello.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30198

  24. Have a seat.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30200

  25. This is very difficult to say, but no one here like you in the office and we are going to have to let you go. Hank, could you come up here please? Hank is our security guard--

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30201

  26. He will be ushering you out.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30203

  27. Oh, your face! Oh!

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30205

  28. No, I'm kidding. No, you're not--you're not fired. Yet.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30207

  29. Oh...

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30209

  30. I don't know, actually.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Line 30211

  31. Oh, no. I still have the lease on the Michael Scott Paper Company, so occasionally I will sneak down here for a little coffee and dancing. I actually dance all the time. Tip-toeing around corporate - it is a ballet. When I am breaking all the rules, I am break dancing. And expresso.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30219

  32. Guys, I'm scared. I'm really scared. I think I'm growing into a giant. Because look at this normal sized coffee cup. Looks so tiny in my giant hand now. Anybody want to go to lunch with me later on?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30220

  33. Okay. How about a woman? Pam?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30222

  34. Oh, really? Ok.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30224

  35. What about the rest of you?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30226

  36. At Dunder-Mifflin there is a very strict no lunch with the boss policy and I don't know who instituted it. I think it started right after my predecessor stepped down, but at the Michael Scott Paper Company I really enjoyed having lunch with Pam and Ryan everyday. So, rules be damned, I wanna have lunch with these people.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30227

  37. Who else? Who else? Ryan?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30228

  38. Ok. Anyone? Anyone? At all? Accounting? I am accounting on you to go to lunch with me.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30231

  39. What?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30234

  40. Ugh! God! What happened to you people? We are just office drones. We are office drones. All we do is work... is work.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30236

  41. I... was just learning... to... love.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30239

  42. No work. No work. No work. I come in here to release frustration. Ooh. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ooh.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30262

  43. That's good.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30264

  44. If you ever want to come down here, door's always open, lock's broken, so...

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30266

  45. Come on in. Hey, hey, hey. Here we go. Here we go. Yeah.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30268

  46. Now you got it.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30270

  47. Now you got it. Hey, you want some espresso?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30272

  48. You gotta keep yourself dehydrated.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30274

  49. Ok. I love it. I love it.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30276

  50. I love it.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30278

  51. Guys, I believe that I have figured out what is up your butts. There's no reason to be scared. The bad man is gone.Charles is gone.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30279

  52. Charles really did a number on these guys. They are way too focused on work. When I was in charge, this place was like Dave and Buster's People just hanging out, having, fun, eating apps. I don't know. It's like Dave died or something.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30280

  53. Daddy's here and daddy is going to take care of you.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30281

  54. I am your big daddy and I am gonna kiss da boo boo.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30283

  55. Andy's afwaid?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30285

  56. Are you all afwaid?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30287

  57. Daddy's here for you. My wittle angels. Ok. I think that I have figured a way to get you guys out of your funk.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30289

  58. Funk is the problem and the solution.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30291

  59. I've taken my downstairs office and I have turned it into a place to hang out. A place where unattractive and attractive people can get together. To meet. To greet. To see the ones that you love. To love the ones that you see.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30293

  60. Why don't you get over lunch, Oscar? Everybody else is past it.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30295

  61. No. Dwight is confusing you. That - it's, it's more of a disco.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30298

  62. ... with coffee but without the haunted.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30300

  63. It's a daytime disco on the ground floor of and industrial office building.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30302

  64. Exactly.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30304

  65. Wha - No. No. Not even close. I can't force you to go down but I can entice you. I'm gonna be down there. Erin will be down there from time to time... and all-you-can-eat espresso.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30306

  66. Well, Kevin, I guess it is just me and you.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30307

  67. Holdin' down the fort.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30309

  68. Thank you.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30311

  69. This is a no work zone. Please respect the lei.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30314

  70. Kevin, stay.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30317

  71. Kevin, stay.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30319

  72. Stay, stay.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30321

  73. Cookie. Kevin, cookie.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30323

  74. Mmm-hmm.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30326

  75. Come on.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30328

  76. Now I know what the founders of Phillip-Morris felt like. you just want to give people a smooth, fun way to relax and suddenly you're just some terrible monster.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30332

  77. Phyllis?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30341

  78. Hey!

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30343

  79. Alright. Back. There you are. There you go. Good. Good. Ooh. Show me some attitude.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30345

  80. Oh, God! No! No! No! No! No!

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30347

  81. Oh, wow! What did you do?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30349

  82. You didn't do that. You're ok. You're ok. Let's lie down. You want to go down? Alright.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30351

  83. Ok. That's ok. That's not a problem. Ok, sweetie.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30353

  84. No. No. No.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30355

  85. It's her back. We just - We need - Let's - You know what?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30358

  86. We're going to take care of you. We're gonna get you help. Let's - come on.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30360

  87. Oh, no. No. No. This is no good.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30362

  88. I don't need you to give me a history lesson. Ok?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30364

  89. It's just, we need to get her out of here because no one is going to want to go in there with a woman writhing around on the floor. Wait, wait, wait. But most importantly we need to get her some medical attention. ASAP. Stat.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30366

  90. Alright. Here we go.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30367

  91. You having fun?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30369

  92. What? Oh, just having to much fun. Phyllis, we're going to put you in here. Dwight's going to take care of you.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30371

  93. Ok, Dwight. Ok. Good. I do not want anyone to worry.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30374

  94. Oh, you know. Nohting. She's - we were hanging out at Cafe Disco and she had a flare up of am existing injury. But she's a tough, old bird. So...

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30376

  95. Ok. Phyllis did injure herself. But she injured herself having fun and I don't think she would trade that memory for anything.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30378

  96. You all took a life here today. you did. The life of the party. Erin?

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30380

  97. I want you to go downstairs and I want you to shut it down.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30382

  98. I don't care. Bury it. I hope you're happy.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30384

  99. I guess they got what they want. I am eating alone. Might as well be dinner.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30397

  100. Cafe Disco is dead but I can still hear the music in my head.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Line 30409