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Michael Scott Quotes from The Office (page 57)

Regional manager of Dunder Mifflin Scranton, World's Best Boss.

12,176 quotes · page 57 of 122

  1. Look at that. Even the receptionist is getting in on the creativity. Very good, very good.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19316

  2. Hello hello!

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19317

  3. Michael Scott.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19319

  4. Regional manager.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19321

  5. Excited to talk ideas.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19323

  6. You know, I want this to be cutting edge. I want it to be fast, quick cuts, you know, youthful, sort of a MTV on crack kind of thing.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19325

  7. All right, good, well this is what we have to work with.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19327

  8. I would like you to meet Andrew Bernard. The 'Nard Dog. Who let the 'Nard Dog out?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19328

  9. He gives the best back rubs in the office.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19330

  10. Now this gentleman right here is the key to our urban vibe.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19332

  11. Stanley is hilarious. Phyllis is like our Mrs. Butterworth. Kind of a less urban Aunt Jemima.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19334

  12. These are our accountants. And as you can see they are very different sizes. What you might want to do is kind of a Papa Bear, Mama Bear, Baby Bear thing. That might be kind of fun.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19335

  13. Who else?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19337

  14. Little girl in a field holding a flower, we zoom back to find that she's in the desert and the field is an oasis. Zoom back further the desert is a sandbox in the world's largest resort hotel. Zoom back further the hotel is actually the playground for the world's largest prison. But we zoom back further---

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19343

  15. Actually I don't get paid by the hour anymore, but thank you, I get paid by the year, so...

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19345

  16. Yeah, I know.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19347

  17. Mmm. Okay.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19349

  18. That's what Nassau came up with? That sucks! Whoa.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19350

  19. Well we can do better than that.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19352

  20. The waving?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19355

  21. Shrek! Shrek, I'm a donkey! I'm a donkey, Shrek! I'm just kidding. It's me. Hello Ry.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19365

  22. Okay, calm down. I have a small problem.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19367

  23. Yeah, well when I call about big problems you don't like that either, so make up you mind, kiddo. Here is the deal, the ad guys that you sent are locking me in a creative box, and sort of ignoring my ideas.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19369

  24. I'm creative, Ryan.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19371

  25. Well actually I can't cook, and I am starting a restaurant. Mike's Cereal Shack. I'm thinking we'll have as many varieties as you can buy in the store.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19373

  26. Yeah!

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19375

  27. Are you? I don't think you're doing such a good job here, suppressing ideas and creativity.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19377

  28. All right, let me ask you this, tell me if you think this is creative. When I was five, I imagined that there was such a thing as a unicorn. And this is before I had even heard of one, or seen one. I just drew a picture of a horse that could fly over rainbows, and had a huge spike in its head. And I was five, five years old. Couldn't even talk yet.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19378

  29. Hey guys, um, you know what, we cannot shoot this ad today.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19379

  30. How about never hundred hours, sir.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19381

  31. Hey thanks. Thank you.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19384

  32. Yeah, I'm glad you called. Ryan is being a little bitch again.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19386

  33. What's up my brotha? Listen, David, I would like to do this ad in house. I want to use only the creativity that we have right here in the office. And I will send it to you tomorrow morning, take a look at it, and if you do not think that it's ready to air, send the ad agency back down here, and we'll do it on my dime.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19388

  34. I'm willing to stake my entire reputation on it.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19390

  35. Okay. And thus, Michael Scott sealed his own destiny. In a good way.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19392

  36. Has anyone ever come up to you and said, 'You're not creative'?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19393

  37. Well they're wrong. You are creative. You are damn creative. Each and every one of you. You are so much more creative than all of the other dry, boring morons that you work with.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19395

  38. We have three scenes to film, big scenes. We have a song to write. So let's get cracking. Kelly, I want you to do makeup. Oscar, I would like you to do costume design, obviously. Phyllis, I'd like you look around town and see if we have any celebrities in our local area.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19400

  39. Okay, okay, Phyllis this is what I want you to do. I want you to go down to the mall. I want you to get in line. I want you to get her to be in this commercial. This would be a huge coupe people. All right? Do not take no for an answer.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19402

  40. Line it up Phyllis.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19410

  41. Time out, time out, time out, time out, time out. I thought... I was under the impression that this was going to be a rap.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19418

  42. Okay, Darryl, wow, you need to learn a lot about your own culture. I'll make you a mix.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19420

  43. Stop. Stop stop stop stop stop stop. This is not me. This is not my music.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19445

  44. No, I hate it! I hate it! ...I don't hate it, I just don't like it at all. And it's terrible.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19448

  45. Okay, you know what. Hold on, hold on Darryl.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19450

  46. No. I said I hate the, the style.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19452

  47. Okay, wow. Wow, this looks uh, terrible.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19454

  48. Andy, Andy, this is a pivotal scene in the ad. And if we don't get this, if we don't nail it, we're going to lose the whole triumph of the moment. The triumph of the will. Now, God, what? What Phyllis?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19456

  49. That'a girl.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19458

  50. Did you, or did you not get Sue Grafton?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19460

  51. Ugh, can somebody give her a tissue please?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19462

  52. I'm about to send the ad to corporate... and it is sent. They'll probably watch it right away. I know I would. Okay.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19486

  53. Pam, please clear my phone lines.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19488

  54. They could call at any second now. Oh God...I better call.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19490

  55. Well, it's been tough. The uh, geniuses at corporate rejected my commercial and tonight they are airing the brain dead version. So welcome one and all to the world premiere of Corporate Crapfest!

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19491

  56. No, it was stupid. People like waving, waving sells. It's not art. Yet we made our ad, the real one was full of humor, and full of depth, and full heart and it was real.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19494

  57. That was fun. Next round of drinks is on me, people!

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19507

  58. All right! So, anybody else? No bad ideas. Everybody, let's keep 'em coming... oh, God. Okay, Toby?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19509

  59. There are no bad ideas but for an idea, that was really, really bad.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19511

  60. And that is probably why most ads suck. Oh, that's them! Those are the ad guys right there. All right, my very fortunate and creative group, go back to your desks and I will let you know when it is time to film. Pam! Pam, come here for a second. Did you get the memo about dressing your best?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19513

  61. About dressing your best today?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19515

  62. Cool. Cool, I just wanted to make sure you got it.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19517

  63. Okay, good. Good.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19519

  64. This is Pam Beesly, representing our girl next door. Pretty but nothing special. You know, but she sort of keeps it real. What you might want to do, is if you could zoom in, like really quick zooms on her. Might be good. Who else? Oh, Creed... is the old guy over there. Don't look at him. You might want to use him to sort of get that Orville Redenbacher dynamic going.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19520

  65. And if not we can just make him disappear. This is Jim! Halpert. Jim has a very expressive face, don't you Jim? He is like our Mr. Bean.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19523

  66. So do, um, do sad, do the sad face.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19525

  67. No, that's skeptical. Do sad.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19527

  68. That's, that's a pirate movie. That's annoyed. Well, he doesn't do very well under pressure.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19529

  69. And anybody else, we can just hire an actor to replace. Follow me! Let's get this movin'.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19531

  70. All right, let's start.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19532

  71. You are my producer, you are a suit. I am the creative genius. You take care of all the boring stuff, and let my mind just run free.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19534

  72. Now, we have eighty-five dollars, and a Sam Goody gift certificate...

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19536

  73. ...and we need to be done by 9 A.M. tomorrow.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19538

  74. We start on a single blank sheet of paper.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19540

  75. And we widen to reveal ancient Rome.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19542

  76. Okay, we widen to reveal a spaceship blasting out of a woman's womb.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19544

  77. Bullman!

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19546

  78. This is bull[censored]!

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19548

  79. Ahhhh!

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19550

  80. If you don't let me pursue my artistic vision, I am going to walk!

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19552

  81. No! No! Jim, Jim, don't, don't...

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19554

  82. No, I can do it.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19556

  83. I can do it good. I can do it good. Please, don't. Please. Please give me it.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19558

  84. Do you want this open or closed?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19560

  85. Hey, everybody, I just got off the phone with David Wallace, and he has given us the go-ahead to make the first ever Dunder Mifflin television commercial. Huh?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19562

  86. I can't hear you! Heard you a little bit less that time. Must be...

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19564

  87. Okay, okay. Who could do music?

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19566

  88. Actually, I'm a little concerned about having a black person do the music, because that could create a positive stereotype that could then become a... celestine prophesy, and keep the next Bon Jovi from ever picking up a piano.

    Season 4 · Episode 5 · Quote 19568

  89. This is perfect.

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19577

  90. This is a dummy, a la Ferris Bueller's Day Off. We have tied a string to the wrist, which goes to the door. When somebody opens the door, the hand goes down, hits the remote, turns on the tape recorder, which is me snoring. Now nobody knows whether I am here, or whether I am gone.

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19579

  91. But, you will not tell anyone.

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19581

  92. Well, sometimes. Most of the time I will be with Ryan, or Darryl. Yes? Oh good, good Stanley! First victim, this is what I want you to do. Go out, come back in. We're going to hide. I want you to tell me if this looks like me, okay?

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19583

  93. Just go out, and come back in.

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19585

  94. What?

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19587

  95. Hey everyone, can I have your attention please? I just thought you all should know that Stanley Hudson is planning on leaving us, because our old friend Karen from Utica is going to give him more money to work there.

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19588

  96. No, no, no, no, no-no, no no. You completely misinterpreted my tone, this is a horrible thing. Clearly, Karen is trying to get back at us because Jim dumped her.

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19590

  97. Okay, smarty pants, then why? Why is she trying to take Stanley from us?

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19592

  98. That could not possibly be it.

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19594

  99. You cannot take the hilarious black guy from the office. Stanley is part of what makes this branch so extraordinary. The bluesy wisdom, the sassy remarks, the crossword puzzles, the smile, those big watery red eyes. I don't know how George Bush did it when Colin Powell left, and if Utica thinks that they are going to poach Stanley, they have another thing coming.

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19595

  100. How can I get you to stay?

    Season 4 · Episode 6 · Quote 19596