Michael Scott Quotes from The Office (page 17)

Regional manager of Dunder Mifflin Scranton, World's Best Boss.

12,176 quotes · page 17 of 122

1. The problem is that when people hear the term 'big brother', they immediately think it's scary or bad, but I don't. I think, wow, I love my big brother.

   Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 4941

2. Meredith has an E-vite from Jim. Barbeque at Jim's tonight. Tonight? Wonder where my e-vitation is. Click on guest list. Angela, Stanley, Oscar, Meredith, Phyllis, Kevin, Creed. Must be... .No.

   Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 4962

3. There's always a distance between a boss and the employees. It is just nature's rule. It's intimidation mostly, it's the awareness that they are not me. I do think that I am very approachable, as one of the guys. But maybe I need to be even approachabler.

   Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 4972

4. Of course. Hangin' with my crew, crew that I am one of. Hangin' with my Cup of Noodles. This is a meal in a cup.

   Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 4976

5. Hot, tasty. Reminds me of college. Lived on this stuff. Brain food. Mmmm... You know what I really, really miss about college? The parties. Everybody'd go. The athletes, the, the nerds, professors.

   Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 4978

6. Yeah! They were the most fun. We always invited them.

   Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 4980

7. Hey there.

   Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5006

8. Almost quittin' time.

   Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5008

9. One more hour. Take care of anything you forgot to do. Hey, you know, I don't know if you have any plans tonight, but if ya don't, we could hang out.

   Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5010

10. You have plans.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5012

11. I do, too. I do, too.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5014

12. I do, yeah. Big plans.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5016

13. Tonight, I can't do it tonight, no. Improv class, I have improv class, hanging out with my improv buds-

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5018

14. Yeah.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5020

15. It's the best. It's the best. I would not miss it for the world. But if something else came up, I would definitely not go.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5022

16. It is. Ok.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5024

17. What?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5026

18. Hey, Pam. Do you need me to walk to your vehicular transport?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5028

19. Alright. Oscar, got big plans tonight with-

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5030

20. Kevin, big man, big man, what are you doing tonight? Where are you off to?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5032

21. Ok, alright.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5034

22. Hey, Angela, rushy, rushy. Where you rushin' off to?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5036

23. Yeah, well duh. Where ya headed?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5038

24. Liar!

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5040

25. You are a liar.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5042

26. Dwight, oh ho, Dwight, Dwight, my loyal compadre. You and I are hangin' tonight. The two of us. We are celebrating our freedom and our manhood. You know what? Why don't we watch that show that you've been wanting to watch, that stupid Battleship Galaxy.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5044

27. That's, whatever stupid show you want-

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5046

28. To watch tonight

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5048

29. We're watching it.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5050

30. I didn't know you played soccer, Dwight.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5052

31. You, too, Dwight?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5054

32. Ooo Ooo Ooo Ooo, Mr. Cart-air, Mr. Cart-air.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5077

33. Boom! Detective Michael Scarn. I'm with the FBI.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5080

34. Think about this; what is the most exciting thing that can happen, on TV, or in movies, or in real life? Somebody has a gun. That's why I always start with a gun, because you can't top it, you just can't.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5081

35. Boom! Freeze! Michael Scoon, FBI. You know what you did. Boom! Boom! Boom! Yeah, you thought that you could get away with your little ruse, didn't you? Didn't ya!? Well, you didn't, because I know where ya hid the diamonds. I been on to you and your little friends for weeks. Boom! Boom! Boom!

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5083

36. Boom! Boom!

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5086

37. Boom! Boom!

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5088

38. Why

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5090

39. Well, if you hadn't stopped the scene, you would have seen where it was going.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5092

40. Boring.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5094

41. I could of-

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5096

42. Ok.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5098

43. Yehhhehh.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5100

44. I'm in.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5121

45. No, no, no. I'm looking in my wallet for money so you can tell me my fortune.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5123

46. What are you...

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5125

47. Nothing.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5127

48. Good, it's good. Good work, everybody.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5131

49. So Bernie's, huh? We're all going to Bernie's? Go to Bernie's?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5150

50. Right, right, right. Well guys, I'd love to go to Bernie's with you, but, you know, I have an office party. A big office party I need to go to, so... Can't get out of it.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5152

51. Ok, see you later. Nice job, Bill. Not.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5154

52. Wow! Who opened the morgue for this thing? I'm just driving by, thought I'd drop in. There's some wine. I would love a glass, if you're gonna open it. Here ya go Temp, take my jacket! Oh, come on! That guy? He is a good guy, not a terrorist. Karaoke, I love it! I am a karaoke fiend. I call dibs. I got next, I got next up. Come on, let's get this party started, ha! Ok? Where's that wine?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5164

53. Ok, yeah, this is a duet, so, need somebody else, Pam? You wanna come up and sing this one? Need somebody else. Takers, please. Baby when I met you there was peace unknown. Kelly? Tried to get you with a fine tooth comb. I was soft inside, there was something goin' on. This part goes to the, uh, girl. You do something to me that I can't explain. Hold me closer and I feel no pain. In every beat of my heart, we got something goin' on. Tender love is blind---

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5165

54. We're making love!

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5167

55. Talk! Just talk!

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5169

56. Shut up!

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5171

57. Funny story: the way that I got into improv was, I got into improv. The story about me getting into improv was that I was walking down the street, and a race car pulls up, and the guy says 'Hey you're funny, you're the funniest guy I've ever seen, or my name is not Dale Earnhardt.' And that was an improv. Um, the real way is that I found a flyer.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5172

58. Um...

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5175

59. Nope, nope. I actually wear a turban sometimes. Wanna see it?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5177

60. Got it right here.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5179

61. Comedy; it's funny. It's Johnny Carson, Karnak. It's, um, put it back. Huhhhh, did you have Johnny Carson in your land?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5181

62. Oh. You were forbidden.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5183

63. Alright, I'm gonna, uhh, get a cup of coffee. Do you want some coffee er-

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5185

64. Or some tea or hummus or something?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5187

65. Should have done this a long time ago. Tons of personal e-mails, huge time wasters. Uh, uh huh. Wow, like Kevin, rating the best bars in Scranton? Poor Richard's number seven? Idiot. Stupid load. Yeah.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5192

66. Yeah, I'm busy right now.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5194

67. Here's a helpful suggestion for Jim. Jim, instead of e-mailing Amazon, to try and get that CD that you didn't receive, I suggest that you go to Visa and tell them to cancel the charge.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5195

68. It's seems like ya did though-

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5197

69. Jim. Lots of e-mails to Amazon, lots of wasted computer space. Alright, let's get back to work.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5199

70. Ooo, bleh bleh bleh.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5201

71. I don't know. Just felt like taking it off. Man, work can be just so damn frustrating don't ya think, Jim?

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5203

72. I don't know, same old stuff. Same old. Boss just been ridin' my ass.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5206

73. I don't wanna talk about it. I just wanna hang out, just be one of the guys.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5208

74. That's not the point.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5210

75. Yeah.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5212

76. Ok.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5214

77. Ok yes, I would never do that.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5216

78. Ha.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5218

79. No, this is completely the time, this is perfect time. This is just guys gently ribbing each other, it's what it's all about, just hangin' out. Enjoying friends, all being the same. Worker bees.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5220

80. No, just bees, just bees hanging out, buzzing around.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5222

81. I'm not a master bee.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5224

82. I'm just a bee, Dwight, ok, just a bee, just buzzin'.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5226

83. Five o'clock. Time to go get my improv on. Little bit of the comedy juice. Mmm. Alright, see if you can guess what this is. That is a dinosaur getting ready to go to improv class. Just a taste of the improv.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5242

84. I need to know... who shot Johnson!

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5243

85. Shut up!

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5245

86. I have a right mind to shoot you right in the head.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5247

87. Just shut up! I don't wanna hear anything more from you.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5249

88. Pow! Pow! Pow! Pow! No deal. Not with Michael Scarn, FBI. Michael Scarn doesn't make deals. Michael Scarn shoots and then asks questions later.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5252

89. She was kind of tripping me up, cause she was, um, I was trying to get something going, when I was over her with the gun, and she like kept changing the story.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5254

90. Well, you kept-

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5256

91. Going into nuclear something; that's not where the scene was going.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5258

92. Well, it goes, it goes in the best direction, and that was not the best direction.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5261

93. Well, he, Michael Scarn, that character, orders people around, and that's, you should of just gone-

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5263

94. Well...

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5265

95. I don't think there's any stronger choice than being a really strong character.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5267

96. Well, it's, like, well, it's, you know, when refine it, refine a character down to its essence, that's...

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5269

97. Exactly, thank you.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5271

98. I appreciate that.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5273

99. Or Ryan Stiles, something like that.

    Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5275

100. You shouldn't have been, 'cause you were dealing with Michael Scarn. That was exactly what I was hoping to achieve, so that is probably the best thing you could have said, that's a compliment.

     Season 2 · Episode 9 · Quote 5277