Dwight Schrute Quotes from The Office | Page 18

Yes? What is the meaning of this?

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11324

Well, the branch is no longer finicially viable. It's simple dollars and cents.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11326

Listen, Scott... we're losing money, okay? It's not a charity; it's a business. And it's a dying business.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11328

Whoa hey, why not?

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11330

Okay.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11332

Dum, dum, dum, du, doy, du, do... coming home from work...

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11334

Uh!

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11336

Ah. Here, replinish your fluids.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11359

who is it?

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11375

Gonna get it?

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11377

Nothing.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11398

Then it was an honor to have worked with you.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11400

My first day when you hazed me by spraying me with a fire extinguisher.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11402

Uh,... my first sale, my promotion to assistant regional manager, our basketball game, when you took me to the hospital, and told me that you cared about me.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11404

What were your favorite moments?

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11406

What about when Jan said the branch was closing?

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11408

Well, it doesn't...

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11410

[picks up his beeping cell phone]

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11434

Oh my God!

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11436

Stranford is closed! Michael, we're not closed. Stamford is closed. Stamford is closed.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11438

We did it!

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11440

In your face!

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11445

Oh, man.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11447

I don't ... have no idea.

Season 3 · Episode 7 · Quote 11449

Psh, why is that great?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11468

What was your mile time?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11470

I could beat that on a skateboard.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11472

Yeah, well my feet don't. And I can still crush that time.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11474

Let's just put it this way. Last weekend I outran a black pepper snake.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11476

I am fast. To give you a reference point. I'm somewhere between a snake and a mongoose. And a panther.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11478

Man, what is taking Toby so long?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11479

And you'll compare the times?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11481

No, my groin...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11483

...is really tight.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11485

I can't...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11487

Aaaaah!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11489

Nametag?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11492

Karen Filippelli.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11494

Probably Italian. Possibly Filipino.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11496

That's Andy Bernard.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11500

If I were you...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11502

...I would fire Anthony Gardner...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11504

...before noon...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11506

...to consolidate power.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11508

No, no, no! Not somebody. Gardner.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11510

The Japanese camp guards of World War II always chose one man to kill whenever a batch of new prisoners arrived. I always wondered how they chose the man who was to die. I think I would have been good at choosing the person.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11511

Hannah Smoterich-Barr.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11518

Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in from Stamford.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11567

Fact - I am older. I am wiser. Do not mess with me.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11569

What are you doing?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11571

I have a smudge on my forehead?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11573

Why are you looking at my forehead?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11575

Meet my eye line, Jim!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11577

Stop acting like an idiot!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11579

Hello. I don't believe we've been introduced. Dwight Schrute. Assistant Regional Manager.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11599

So you'll be reporting to me, then.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11601

My title has 'Manager' in it.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11603

Oh.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11605

I know everything about film. I've seen over 240 of them.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11607

We need to talk!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11629

Which is higher? Assistant Regional Manager or Regional Director in Charge of Sales?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11631

Okay. So who gets paid more? Me or Andy?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11633

Ok. Who reports to who?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11635

And then if I want...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11637

I...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11639

I...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11641

One...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11643

Yo Mike, our town is dope and pretty.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11670

What?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11674

What?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11676

But check that it's covered by your health care provider!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11678

But the little cars go in the compact spot

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11683

Do you mean to me? From you? Cause that's how it works.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11697

Do you have batteries?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11749

Very funny, Michael!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11769

Really funny, Michael!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11771

Do this. Come on. Ready?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11784

On three. One... two... three.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11786

Hey, hey. Easy.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11802

That was my advice. Remember? I'm the one who suggested that you fire him.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11822

And what advice has Andy given to you today that you have acted on? Would 'none' be an accurate estimate? None advice? Fire Andy. Fire. Andy.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11824

What!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11833

YEAH!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11838

If he even wants it. It doesn't come with a pay raise.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11871

So who will be your new Number Three?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11873

And I have to say your leadership...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11877

has brought...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11879

Uh, try double that. Classic TransAm, vintage American muscle. Please.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11907

Xterra's not even a real word.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11909

Oh, so you drive an X-Earth?

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11911

That makes sense. I'd rather drive a classic TransAm than an XEarth.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11913

Well I hope 1985 has a time machine 'cause I drive an 87.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11915

Speaking of funerals, why don't you go ahead and go die.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11917

Idiot!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11919

If you were driving a TransAm, you would be the smartest idiot in the whole world.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11921

You're the idiot!

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11923

I was making fun of your comeback! That's why it worked. Totally got the best of that interchange.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11925

Nash.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11927

Male, age 37...

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11929

Mocha complexion. Supplier relations. Either caught a fish or was standing next to a man who caught a fish in Key West, Florida.

Season 3 · Episode 8 · Quote 11931

Dwight Schrute Quotes from The Office (page 18)