Pam Beesly Quotes from The Office (page 49)

Receptionist turned office administrator and Michael Scott Paper Company co-founder.

5,376 quotes · page 49 of 54

1. Andy.

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2. Can you go instead?

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3. You've got this Schrute.

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4. Oh, I'll be the buyer.

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5. Hello, Mr. Schrute, nice to see you. Please have a seat.

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6. Okay, let's stop here. Anyone have any thoughts?

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7. Okay, when you're selling to women, it is crucial that you listen, Dwight. Also you want to respect their... Are you listening now?

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8. Okay, well you have to show us.

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9. Huh. Uh huh.

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10. A little smile and a nod shows that I hear you. Got it?

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11. Nellie, why don't you tell Dwight what we were doing earlier today. And Dwight, you show us that you're listening.

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12. Ten years ago, I didn't care if Dwight got married or died a beet-farming bachelor. But having kids makes you so soft. I used to watch Pulp Fiction and laugh, and now I'm like, that poor gimp is somebody's child.

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13. You know, I think there could be a lot of benefits if you could learn to get along with women.

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14. Dwight, listen to me. Businesswomen are just normal, nice, reasonable people. Who is a nice, reasonable person in your experience?

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15. Okay, so, when you're selling to this woman, just imagine that she's that nice, reasonable barber.

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16. Mm-hmm. Good. Baby steps.

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17. Like, he used to make dogs fight? Or he actually fought dogs?

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18. Oh, great. Oh, I'm sorry. Do you mind telling me her name? I realized we don't have it.

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19. Okay, great.

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20. Oh my God. It's Jan.

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21. Jan used to be one of my superiors, and she is one of the most erratic and terrifying people I have ever met.

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22. Jim and I are pretty sure she had an affair with her ex-assistant Hunter. He was 17. But she looks great. If she asks, will you tell her I said that?

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23. Forget everything we taught you. Hey, Jan! It's so great to see you.

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24. What?

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25. Sorry. Um, David is in Vermont. Did you speak with him? He sent Dwight instead.

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26. So this was all just a trick. You don't really have any business to give?

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27. But not to us.

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28. You did good, Dwight. It's okay. I mean, seriously, Jan's not normal. Let's just go. She's not going to sell to us.

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29. What?

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30. Yeah.

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31. Yeah. Um, do you have any other pictures of Astrid?

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32. Wow. Your voice is as lovely as ever.

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33. And it is so cute how she signs her name.

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34. Oh, okay. It's just that's how Cece does it with the backwards 'E's.

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35. Oh, actually she can.

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36. Of course.

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37. Um... 'A'... 'X'? I don't -- you got me.

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38. I'm so sorry. I hate this. You're better.

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39. Mm. Excuse me. Could I get some more water?

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40. Oh, my God.

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41. Okay, you do not have to do this.

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42. Oh, hey, Molly. You should just quit.

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43. Dwight, that was really nice. You should ask for her number.

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44. That's a license number?

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45. Oh. Why me?

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46. These are my painting clothes.I think I'm gonna do it. I am really gonna start painting the warehouse mural today.

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47. Are you avoiding your phone call?

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48. Last week Jim wasn't there, and they named the company Athlead.

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49. Tell them your opening line.

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50. I think it's good. He likes fishing.

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51. I guess if I make a mistake, I can just paint over it with a shrub or something. It's just, I think less of paintings with a lot of shrubs. So, I'm gonna limit myself to one shrub.

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52. Yeah. Painting now. I just want to make sure that...

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53. It's probably gonna be a few minutes. So you can just go back to doing whatever you were doing.

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54. I could get us a complaint.

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55. No, I wouldn't. I can't even relate to that impulse. But I bet I could get us a customer complaint. I'd like to try.

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56. Hello, this is Pam Halpert. I'm calling from Dunder-Mifflin. Yes, your paper provider. And I just called to say... your mama is so fat, when she wears red, people yell, 'Hey, kool-aid.' Yeah, your mama's fat. This is Pam Halpert.

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57. Basically I couldn't tell, but I think...

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58. I-- I thought they were confused at least...

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59. I did not know that.

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60. I'm so sorry.

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61. If you're an artist, you have to be okay with the idea that you can't please everybody all the time.

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62. Shut up, Hide! I mean, do you think Kevin cares what people think about him-- or Creed or Meredith? Oh my gosh, these are my role models now. You know what? I'm okay with that.

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63. I'm sure it's fine. it's a blue shirt.

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64. I'm on it.

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65. We're the party planning committee, and we did not get where we are by playing it safe. We got here by being risk takers. And, yeah, Dwight's party is gonna be terrible. Maybe. Maybe it's not. Maybe it's going to be great. And if it's great...I think we all know what that would mean to us.

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66. Yes! Phyllis!

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67. What does that even mean? Where would your name appear?

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68. The party planning committee, minus Angela, has decided that we're all going to do Dwight's Christmas.

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69. Dwight, there is one rule that you need to take very seriously.

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70. And that is...

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71. That there are no rules.

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72. You're welcome.

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73. What is it? Don't touch it.

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74. Oh!

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75. I feel like--Dwight is holding a candle and reading a poem.

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76. And the fear.

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77. Wow.

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78. Mouse trap.

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79. Oh, really? Already?

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80. Well...this is it.

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81. Shut up. I'm trying to be serious.

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82. I can't believe this is actually happening.

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83. Okay. Good luck. You're gonna be great.

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84. Okay.

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85. Love you.

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86. What's going on?

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87. For what it's worth, I liked your party better.

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88. I don't think anyone thought that.

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89. Well, that didn't have anything to do with you.

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90. Zero.

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91. Dwight, want me to get you some eggnog?

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92. Jim!

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93. Oh--Oh my god!

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94. What happened? Did you miss your bus?

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95. What?

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96. Jim's been spending a few days a week in Philly and I'm not gonna lie, it's been challenging. Yesterday, things took a turn for the worse. I found out Cece has lice. So I was up all night disinfecting every sheet, towel, toy, item of clothing in the entire house. I'm exhausted. But don't tell Jim. He has a huge meeting today, under a lot of pressure and he's doing it all for the family.

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97. Great. Everything's great. Hey are you nervous about your big meeting?

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98. Oh, call me later!

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99. Good luck!

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100. Love you.

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