Oscar Martinez Quotes from The Office (page 10)

Accountant and the office's resident fact-checker.

1,490 quotes · page 10 of 15

1. Are you guys listening to this?

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2. Not occasionally. All the time.

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3. Good.

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4. Just leave it how you said...

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5. Okay, this is much worse than before.

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6. Are you kidding? I wasn't trying to break you guys up.

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7. Go on. Kiss each other already.

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8. I just told them to do it!

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9. Michael how's this supposed to work? Packer's gonna keep saying terrible things, and then he's just gonna make half-assed apologies. And we're back to square one.

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10. No. Everybody assumes I am. I always get them as gifts.

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11. She's the one.

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12. Wanna know how to do it? Here's how you do it. Take her out to dinner. Go down on one knee. If you are in costume, you did something wrong. If at any point you find yourself tying a ring to a dogs collar, stop, and look at yourself.

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13. What... Ryan, where did you get this picture?

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14. No.

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15. Where was that.

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16. Will you marry me?

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17. Michael is leaving. And apparently they've already hired a new manager. And we're meeting him today. It's a lot to process. Paperwork wise.

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18. You wanted to talk to us Deangelo?

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19. Well, Deangelo, I'd say communication could be improved. People stopped reading memos, so everyone marks them urgent.

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20. Michael, this is serious! Do you know what happens if Deangelo touches a peanut?

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21. Michael, This is insane.

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22. [laughing]

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23. Try Jim, Deangelo. He'll be able to help.

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24. The analytical part of me wants to examine it, but I know it has no content.

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25. I forgive you for kissing me!

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26. It's his last Dundies.

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27. Come on Toby.

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28. Thank you Michael. It's beautiful.

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29. State Senator.

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30. Brava!

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31. Oh Michael! Where do you want your last pay check sent?

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32. You have an address yet in Colorado?

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33. What town do Holly's parents live in?

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34. These sound like good ideas, why wouldn't we like them?

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35. No thank you.

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36. My God. There is a hardwood floor underneath this carpeting. Why would they do that?

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37. I'll look on WebMD. What are your symptoms?

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38. Firewall.

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39. Could you turn the volume down on the beeping?

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40. Angela's engaged to a gay man. As a gay man, I'm horrified. As a friend of Angela's, horrified. As a lover of elegant weddings, I'm a little excited. But overall, horrified.

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41. Pam... I think Robert is gay.

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42. So!?

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43. I have a very strong suspicion.

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44. What bathhouse?

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45. What?

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46. My friend at the Scranton Blade is totally plugged into these matters.

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47. You're thinking of another group. Much wealthier, much older. You sound ignorant.

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48. No. Why would we be talking about the Senator?

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49. Is there a front runner?

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50. Well, there must be someone who stands out.

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51. Well...

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52. Are you?

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53. You have met a lesbian in real life, right?

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54. You're right. You're right. She seems happy. We don't tell her.

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55. Erin, what are you doing?

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56. Okay.

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57. I don't think he meant, that--

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58. Go ahead.

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59. Can I say...?

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60. I think it should be Darryl.

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61. Kelly's on your side.

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62. Oh, for God's sake.

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63. Planking is a very stupid and dangerous trend. Basically, you lie like a plank in weird places. That's it. Sometimes you get run over. Welcome to the Internet.

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64. Cultural ghetto? Totally- totally agree.

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65. Good night Andy.

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66. I-

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67. I know.

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68. I'll start with a side salad and uh, oh, chicken piccata.

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69. No, guys.

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70. He's fine.

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71. He's making a statement. It's an ironic comment on our expectations of him. A funhouse image of our model of Kevin.

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72. ''C-SPAN'?

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73. Let me call you back.

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74. We don't get it.

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75. Really?

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76. Can you believe this?

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77. You can't leave a dog in a parked car. Snowboarder, it figures.

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78. I bet this guy didn't leave his weed in the car. OK we have to do something because this is incredibly dangerous.

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79. This guy's been gone long enough. He's lost his right to a window.

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80. Come on buddy, get back.

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81. And one for good measure!

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82. Why would we take the dog?

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83. Jim, he's not gonna star-

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84. Shh! Shh! Stay there, stay.

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85. There we go. That should do it.

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86. What really interests me is the group dynamic of six people winning the lottery. This will not end well. Right?

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87. At least.

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88. Really, nobody's gonna help her? Is chivalry dead?

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89. Of course. I would. But my hip....I would kill to be at a hundred percent.

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90. Bulk or definition?

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91. Bruce Kenwood. He hangs out at Plant Fitness.

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92. Oh, he's plenty strong.

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93. It used to be Reggie Winters out at Gold's Gym. But he moved away. And then it was between Bruce and this guy Dean. Um, but Dean got fixated on his calves and uh, and his triceps went to hell.

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94. It's really not.

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95. Andy, we understand basic table manners, we're not children.

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96. Andy, stop hovering, you're being really annoying.

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97. Wow.

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98. Technically FOR Robert California. He's our CEO.

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99. Guess we found Andy's rosebud.

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100. It's a reference to Citizen Kane. Something that explains why a person became the way they are.

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