Warehouse foreman turned corporate.
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Yeah, we had a few fights, I suppose. But last night we put a lot of that to bed. I can't tell you what I did with my ex wife last night'. I have to sing it. We took a shower, we were naked. We ska dap dap doo doo doo doo doo doo doo.
Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46059
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rub a dub dub'I got scrubbed. 'Sup, darlin'? Everybody, this is Justine. This is Jim and Oscar, everybody.
Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46124
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Follow me, I got a space. After you. I've been thinking about you all mornin'. I don't know what you did, I can barely walk today.
Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46128
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A car parked in the sun is like a toaster oven.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46317
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Hey, hey, hey. Vick did his time.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46326
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Hello?....Justine! Nice surprise! How you doin' baby?....Nah. No no, I didn't win. When I got promoted I stop-...what?...Yeah. Yeah, Glenn won....Oh, you wanna call him? Yeah, you should call him, congratulate him. That'll be-...What?....Oh, his number's in your old phone. Oh, you know what? I might have it right- Whoops.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46355
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When I worked in the warehouse, I was part of that lotto pool. They won ' playing my birthday.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46356
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I don't know.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46379
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No.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46381
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I haven't hired anyone.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46383
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I'm not checkin' email till lunch. Four hour work week.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46385
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I got it. I'm doin' it.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46387
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When did I get so fat?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46408
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I didn't hire anyone if that's why you're here.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46410
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I have a file of applicants here. I just gotta open it, look at it, interview a bunch of guys,hire some of 'em. So I'd say we're in the early stages of the process.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46412
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The guys did invite me out to celebrate but I decided to just stay home. Eat a bunch of tacos in my basement.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46414
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I did. I did have a fantastic basement. Now it smells like tacos. You can't air out a basement and taco air is heavy. Settles at the lowest point.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46416
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You mean what did we do the last time the warehouse won the lottery?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46425
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Oh yeah.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46429
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One of 'em, Glenn, is starting one of those fat camps where he steals your kid in the middle of the night. Madge and a couple other guys might start a strip club, but on a boat. And Heday is investing in an energy drink for Asian homosexuals.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46431
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I don't
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46433
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Nope. I'm good. I'm here. Let's find some warehouse workers.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46435
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OK.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46437
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OK.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46439
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Yeah.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46441
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Why do you wanna work here?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46446
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That's not a good reason.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46448
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Don't just take the first job that comes your way. Cause next thing you know, it's ten years later and you're still there. Could write your obituary tomorrow, it's not gonna change.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46450
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I hope so. Think about this carefully. There's better lives than this one.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46452
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I've never been lucky. And I'm not talkin' about the lottery, I'm talkin' 'bout stuff like developing a soy allergy at thirty-five. Who gets a soy allergy at thirty-five? And why is soy in everything?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46453
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Did you hire 'em?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46482
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What do you mean 'they left'?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46484
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Then I think you should fire me.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46486
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Yeah. Just put me out of my misery.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46488
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No? OK. I don't wanna be here anymore. Fire me.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46490
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Would you just fire me, man?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46532
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You wanna make me happy? Huh?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46534
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Give me your job.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46536
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I'll do it better than you. I earned it. I deserve it. I got passed over, God knows why, reasons I cannot and will not understand. The job was mine Andy, everyone said it was mine. Make me manager or fire me.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46538
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He died.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46542
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I didn't have time because of my daughter.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46546
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Hey I'm not gonna tell you this stuff if you gonna throw it back in my face.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46548
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OK.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46550
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OK, don't fire me.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46552
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My future's not gonna be determined by seven little white lotto balls. It's gonna be determined by two big black balls. I control my destiny. I do.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46554
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I put some guys on tonight. Best of your bunch and my bunch. Tell you now though, it's gonna be mostly my bunch.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46555
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Why is the forklift in the wall?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46560
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Is that grease on my floor?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46563
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And did your brains tell you to ruin these boxes with grease?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46565
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And?
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46568
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Let me see it.
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46581
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Let me see it!
Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46583
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What happens when we're done chewing? Do we spit it out on the floor, or keep it in our mouths the rest of the time?
Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46659
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There's a grill in the warehouse I could bring.
Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46664
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I've seen this, that's not you.
Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46672
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Yeah, I'll say something. I think we should be acknowledging our boss, because none of us would be here without him. Robert California!
Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46773
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I think if I had parents like that I'd be trying to convince everyone all the time how great I was, too.
Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46833
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Rosebud?
Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46835
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I know Citizen Kane. Rosebud didn't explain why he was how he was, it just represented what was important to him as a child, that he missed.
Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46837
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No. You're wrong.
Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46839
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Cheeseburger or hamburger.
Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46847
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He gets condescending when he's nervous. Or when he's excited or sleepy. Not an easy person to be friends with.
Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46869
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Put it on, man.
Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46917
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Three Kings.
Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46920
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This party's tight. The fog is cool.
Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47075
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Perfect.
Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47077
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I just don't get it, Pam. I mean, you're a rational person.
Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47108
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Dwight?
Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47118
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Dwight.
Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47121
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Dwight!
Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47123
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[in the bathroom with Robert[ Yeah, I guess sometimes I have nightmares about being buried alive.
Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47134
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Nahh! No. Not Justine. Never Justine.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47222
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Oh yeah.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47224
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Ahh'We don't really do those. We just sign the thing.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47227
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I'll be there.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47229
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It's not a race.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47288
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Who knows what the belt is for?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47290
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Apparently we have a visitor. Gabe, everyone.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47292
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All right so the support belt. Now this one is mine. Doesn't get much use nowadays.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47294
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You done?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47298
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Once you read the packet, sign the back.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47323
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Actually, Val, why don't you come with? I'll need the extra hands to carry them back.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47325
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Mmhmm. Caramel soy latte.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47328
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Got it.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47330
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Yeah, when are they gonna do a Labradoodle that's just Lab?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47401
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Good policy. Sensible. Smart.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47411
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What are you doing here, Gabe?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47497
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[on phone]It's Darryl. Erin told me to pretend to be a cop and say your mom died.
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47541
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Dude.
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47543
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Look man this is a bad idea.
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47545
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Really? That is messed up man.
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47547
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You're a bad man Andy Bernard.
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47549
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That stuff can come back to get you. It's called karma. You do not want to be messing around. I got an uncle'
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47551
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What are you doing with my lunch?
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47571
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It's not pizza.
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47573
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I like the sound of that. Is Kevin in?
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47575
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Nice scatting, man.
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47600
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That was never agreed upon.
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47610
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Again, never agreed upon.
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47619
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Usually that life is short and tragic. That's okay, right?
Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47621