Andy Bernard Quotes from The Office (page 9)

Cornell graduate, a cappella soloist, the Nard Dog.

3,969 quotes · page 9 of 40

1. Is somebody there?

   Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25134

2. I have needs.

   Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25136

3. Naked.

   Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25138

4. We'll discuss it later naked. I want to see you naked.

   Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25140

5. Oscar

   Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25158

6. That was fun last night.

   Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25160

7. You know, it's true what they say--- Long Island iced teas are way stronger in Canada.

   Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25162

8. You kidding me? It's what I do. Get the whole nine 'nards.

   Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25164

9. Totally. What--- Who?

   Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25166

10. We called Angela?

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25168

11. That was real?! I thought I dreamed that. Oh, God!

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25170

12. Oh, God!

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25172

13. So bad!

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25174

14. Oh man, she is so pissed.

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25196

15. She's taking us back to first base.

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25198

16. I get to kiss her forehead. I had a good time hanging out this weekend.

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25200

17. Wingman for life. W.M.F.L

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25202

18. You up for a chest bump?

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25204

19. Bro hug? Back to basics. I like it.

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25206

20. I had to go all the way to Canada to get to know a guy who sits 20 feet away from me. And he's delightful!

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25207

21. So, Tunes, you still gonna buy your old man's place?

    Season 5 · Episode 8 · Quote 25302

22. Ehhh no, I was just walking by your desk. I saw some email. I got peepers of an eagle.

    Season 5 · Episode 8 · Quote 25304

23. Kaaw!

    Season 5 · Episode 8 · Quote 25306

24. Whoa, you haven't told the misses about the castle? You're in for a spanking my friend. Myself and my lady? - no secrets.

    Season 5 · Episode 8 · Quote 25311

25. That is just obnoxious.

    Season 5 · Episode 8 · Quote 25320

26. No, the note is way more obnoxious than the mess.

    Season 5 · Episode 8 · Quote 25326

27. Dwight, I'm a little concerned about some of these directions to Schrute Farms...

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25598

28. I mean, like, '156 paces from the light red mailbox, make a left.'

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25600

29. Walk until you hear the beehive.'

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25602

30. Let's three-way this little issue, and come to a solution by the time we get to Schrute Farms, how's that for a plan?

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25610

31. We're getting married at Schrute Farms, no matter what. I have looked at twelve venues, I have lost eight deposits, and I have seen Angela naked zero times. I am not losing another deposit.

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25611

32. Hmm... mm, what's that smell?

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25626

33. Uh, Dwight, if we pay extra, could you slaughter the entrees the day before?

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25633

34. See? That's how you do it! Makin' progress here. ...Darn! Heh.

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25635

35. Okay.

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25637

36. Okay, guys!

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25717

37. What is this? All right, we're all on the same team. Is it- Damn! Why is that in the kitchen?!

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25720

38. Hey-o!

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25747

39. [whistling Pachelbel's 'Canon in D;' switches to singing then back to whistling]

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25749

40. I'm Andy.

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25751

41. What?

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25754

42. Are we, uh... are we leaving or what? Ow!

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25801

43. Hey Tuna, check it out. Tuna sandwich. Just like you. What-

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25847

44. Was that hot or what?

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25849

45. Hey, hey... Ange... check it out. There's a place in France where the naked ladies dance.

    Season 5 · Episode 10 · Quote 25905

46. There's a hole in the wall where the men can see it all.

    Season 5 · Episode 10 · Quote 25907

47. Sorry.

    Season 5 · Episode 10 · Quote 25929

48. When I was in college I used to get wicked hammered. My nickname was puke. I would chug a fifth of socos, sneak into a frat party, polish off a few people's empties, some brewskies, some Jell-O shots, do some body shots off myself, pass out, wake up the next morning, puke, rally, more soco, head to class. Probably would have gotten expelled if I had let it affect my grades, but I aced all my courses. They called me Ace. It was totally awesome. Got straight B's. They called me Buzz.

    Season 5 · Episode 10 · Quote 25961

49. What's up?

    Season 5 · Episode 10 · Quote 26018

50. Sure.

    Season 5 · Episode 10 · Quote 26020

51. All right, everybody's still here. Perfect! Got a little surprise I've been working on. Angela, my bride, I just wanted you to know that for the rest of our lives, no matter the cultural milieu, I will always be there to bring you Christmas cheer. Deck the halls with boughs of holly. Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la. Tis the season to be jolly. Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la. Don we now our gay apparel. Fa-la-la-la-la-LA. Troll the little Yule tide carol. Roo-di-di-di-do. Roododododo.

    Season 5 · Episode 10 · Quote 26105

52. Sure. Dooo. Tough room. Come on. I just learned it. Just so you know protocol is a little round of applause. But, Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

    Season 5 · Episode 10 · Quote 26107

53. Excuse me, everyone, can I have the floor please? Um, this is insanely awkward. It's kind of the elephant in the room, so I'll just... No one has RSVP'ed to our wedding yet, and the deadline was yesterday.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26133

54. Hmm?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26136

55. No, no one has RSVP'ed, and I don't understand it, and now, you're shutting me out. You're not even listening. That's really considerate. Thank you.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26144

56. That cannot be true! You're going to charge me a fee to cut my own cake? Uh, no. No, no, no. What I'm saying is, I want to cut it myself...

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26170

57. When what? When what?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26190

58. What can't go on?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26192

59. Seems like...

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26194

60. You guys should... be hearing what I'm saying.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26196

61. Yeah.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26222

62. Will do, boss-man.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26224

63. You're not making any sense.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26226

64. All righty.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26228

65. Have a good meeting!

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26230

66. Kick Wallace's ass!

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26232

67. I can't hear you through the glass

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26234

68. What?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26236

69. Are you serious?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26238

70. I need to talk to you.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26248

71. I need to talk to you in private.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26250

72. Let's go to the conference room.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26252

73. Is it true?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26253

74. That you're sleeping with Dwight.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26255

75. Is it true?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26257

76. Just answer the question. Are you sleeping with Dwight?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26259

77. How long has it been going on?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26261

78. Who else knows about it?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26263

79. Who else?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26265

80. Oh God. Come on!

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26267

81. So like, missionary...

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26278

82. Do you love him?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26280

83. Why should I believe that?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26282

84. Who says that?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26284

85. Where's Dwight?

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26286

86. No. Not at all, actually. But thanks for asking. Appreciate it. You know what? I'd also like to take this opportunity to thank all of you for lying. To my face. And not telling me what's been going on this entire time.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26288

87. Dwight.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26290

88. It's over.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26292

89. No. It's over between you two.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26294

90. You have to.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26296

91. She doesn't love you. She's marrying me.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26298

92. Angela Bernard.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26300

93. It will be her name. And you will have to call her that!

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26302

94. I'm telling you to back down.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26305

95. Then I'll make you.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26307

96. Through the use of force.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26309

97. I will fight you.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26311

98. Fine!

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26314

99. Guess what? Not happening at work.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26321

100. We're gonna do it outside.

     Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26323