Andy Bernard Quotes from The Office (page 19)

Cornell graduate, a cappella soloist, the Nard Dog.

3,969 quotes · page 19 of 40

1. Wait. Seriously?

   Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39824

2. So we're just, like, jamming as friends?

   Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39826

3. Closet full of mes-

   Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39828

4. I'll be your croak madame.

   Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39853

5. Croak, croak, croak. Bullfrog in love.

   Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39857

6. Ribbit!

   Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39859

7. What about this one? It's kinda badass, right? Just seems kinda crazy in a way I might need right now.

   Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39862

8. Handbag.

   Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39868

9. Shh! Shhh!

   Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39870

10. Tuna! Tuna! Do you want us to skip this party?

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39946

11. You know what else? The-this... this sucks for Jim. Right? But it also sucks for us. Because we don't get invited to a ton of Halloween parties.

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39949

12. Creed's going?!

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39951

13. Screw corporate! They probably stole the idea anyway.

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39967

14. Hey, Danny.

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39978

15. I'm really sorry, but we can't come to your party tonight.

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39980

16. You were?

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39982

17. We're just like, totally caught in the middle here.

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39985

18. Well Jim and Pam basically begged us not to go...

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 39987

19. Sookehhh. Bill Compton, from True Blood.

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 40049

20. What's up, man?

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 40132

21. When I was a freshman in college, I worked at the student newspaper, the Cornell Daily Sun? This was at Cornell. I had to write an op-ed column every day. Bernard's Regards.

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 40134

22. I started to ask myself, 'Do I have big plans here?' I didn't want to become editor of that paper, so I got up and walked right out of Walter Bernard hall, and that's actually when I heard eight male voices, singing, unencumbered by instruments. I was hooked. So is becoming CEO of this company your a capella group? Come on, we're going to Danny's bar. Public School.

    Season 7 · Episode 6 · Quote 40136

23. And a top of the day to you too, sir.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40173

24. Ah, man.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40177

25. Does the Nard-dog want Nard-pups? Yeah. I want a big ol' litter of Nard-pups. All jumping around, sucking on the teet. Put 'em in a box, give 'em to my neighbors. Yeah, I want kids.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40178

26. What if the moon was your car and Jupiter was your hair brush?

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40283

27. Michael, you can't go to Mexico. You don't have your passport.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40323

28. Save me an aisle seat, Michael! I'm coming!

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40335

29. I will not stand idly by while these Mexican villagers are sick.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40336

30. Whatever. I won't-I won't stand for it.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40338

31. We're one in a million.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40342

32. Just a heads up. Probably gonna be borrowing a few things. Uh, gonna need a contact lens case, some sunscreen, some sandals...

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40345

33. Good-bye, Lackawana County.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40350

34. Well, two days minus how long we've been on the road. 45 minutes? So, like, two days basically. Maybe more.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40352

35. I don't know, I thought it was like a gymnasium or...

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40354

36. They don't know how.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40356

37. Well, Carla knows.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40358

38. Do you smell like a weird, warm cheese?

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40362

39. And the Christmas party.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40364

40. Nah, no. We'll be back before that.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40366

41. I can make myself cry.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40393

42. Should I-I got it. I got it. Um, hey, I saw a sign for a scenic overlook coming up. Really love to check out the view.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40395

43. Well, uh, there's a nice bistro coming up. We could pick up some Paninis for the road.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40397

44. Just make him stop the freaking bus!

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40404

45. It doesn't matter.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40410

46. If we went to Mexico, we'd probably screw everything up anyway.

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40412

47. Stop the bus!

    Season 7 · Episode 7 · Quote 40414

48. I bet he's wishing he had a hybrid, right? Sixty miles to the gallon in the city.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40443

49. You're having a party at Gabe's apartment?

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40472

50. You would?

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40474

51. Try and keep me from coming!

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40476

52. Try and hide it, I will track this party down!

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40478

53. No what?

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40531

54. Yeah.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40533

55. Oh thanks.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40539

56. Why does Erin like Gabe?

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40541

57. That's really nice, thank you.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40543

58. [pours powdered seahorse into his wine glass]

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40545

59. Ladies and gentlemen please welcome, Phyllis Vance! Isn't that White Diamonds Maya Smith Taylor?

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40569

60. My nanny used to wear that.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40571

61. I just ate powdered seahorse! I have to admit I did not think it was gonna work, but it is totally working! I feel exactly like a seahorse! Blub blub blub blub blub blub blub blub.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40572

62. Hey Creed, would you read Chinese?

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40609

63. What does this say?

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40611

64. Hello UPS! Still waiting on that five minutes with Erin order. Oh never mind it's here. Oh if it isn't the bell of the ball! You throw a lovely party ma lady...

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40613

65. Did you wear my favorite outfit on purpose?

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40615

66. You're four seasons in a day. You... got the Autumn thing going on. But if you put on ba- Put if you put on a blue... It's Spring Time in the Rockies!

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40617

67. No!

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40619

68. Puts pillow in front of the puke.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40643

69. Erin likes Gabe.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40645

70. Do you think that they've ever...

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40647

71. Well girls tell each other things right?

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40649

72. I accidentally ate some seahorses.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40705

73. I didn't know it's powdered, so like four or five, I don't know.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40707

74. That's so beautiful.

    Season 7 · Episode 8 · Quote 40709

75. I got it, try, um--[Coughs]

    Season 7 · Episode 9 · Quote 40725

76. I'm sorry, nine days until what?

    Season 7 · Episode 9 · Quote 40833

77. Anyone can just throw numbes up on a chart. What are you doing to make it happen?

    Season 7 · Episode 9 · Quote 40850

78. You have his email?

    Season 7 · Episode 9 · Quote 40853

79. That sounds weird.

    Season 7 · Episode 9 · Quote 40884

80. Yeah, sell.

    Season 7 · Episode 9 · Quote 40904

81. Your doing the wrong thing. You're gonna lose Michael's investment. You're gonna lose ours.

    Season 7 · Episode 9 · Quote 40988

82. If you tell Michael to sell, he'll sell.

    Season 7 · Episode 9 · Quote 40990

83. All those in favor of selling, say aye.

    Season 7 · Episode 9 · Quote 40996

84. You're gonna lose all of our money.

    Season 7 · Episode 9 · Quote 41001

85. What's the occasion?

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41031

86. I would like a muffa du blueberry por favor.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41033

87. Eight dollars?

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41035

88. Yeah, its where they make stuff.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41042

89. Hey Darryl.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41050

90. But I wanted you to know that Michael and I are wearing the same tie today. It's insane.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41052

91. Got it. Then I will call you.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41054

92. Well are you?

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41121

93. Oh my gosh she is so cute. She looks like both of you.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41152

94. Oh, cool.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41154

95. Megan Fox! Come on!

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41181

96. Yes, but one good text away from a high five.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41183

97. Oh, its on.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41185

98. It is not just coffee.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41203

99. And then he will smugly pay the cheque and make you feel so small.

    Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41206

100. Damn it. Michael, you are moments away from the smack down of your life. If you don't know something, steer the conversation back to something you do know.

     Season 7 · Episode 10 · Quote 41228