Jan Levinson Quotes from The Office (page 4)

Corporate VP, candle entrepreneur.

949 quotes · page 4 of 10

1. No. No, you didn't. Hi, I'm Jan. I'm Michael's boss.

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2. Does anyone want a drink?

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3. Okay.

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4. Cosmopolitan, please.

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5. Well, it's part of the job, you know? Keep an eye on things. So... Why not? So, how long have you and Michael been...

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6. Casino Night in the warehouse. Good sport.

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7. Oh, me too. Me too.

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8. What?

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9. No, I...

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10. I didn't... I don't know...

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11. Smoke?

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12. Fabulous time. I drove two and a half hours to get here.

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13. Left work early, drove down here. And I am completely underdressed

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14. Why did I hook up with Michael?

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15. It was very late, Jim. Very... Very late and... Have you given any more thought to the transfer?

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16. Good. Have you told anyone?

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17. Well, you should.

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18. Hey. I'm leaving.

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19. So, I just wanted to congratulate you on a fantastic evening. You did the company proud.

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20. And thanks for inviting me. You were right, I needed it. So, thanks.

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21. Nice to meet you.

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22. And you guys have a good time together.

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23. Yeah.

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24. You know, it's amazing to me that in this day and age, you could be so obtuse about sexual orientation.

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25. That's not what it's called.

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26. Coming out, is a significant moment for a gay person, and they should be allowed to select the timing and manner of announcing it.

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27. NO!

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28. No, it's not possible.

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29. You know, imagine... you were gay.

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30. Michael, your immaturity is extremely disappointing and may even lead to a lawsuit which is the absolute last thing this company needs right now. Do you understand?

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31. Okay, what is your goal for after lunch?

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32. Heaven help us. Specifically.

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33. Specifically

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34. Are you on the toilet, Michael?

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35. Well, I know sometimes you are and... that you wouldn't tell me, so I'm just going to assume that you are, and call me back when you're finished.

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36. Oh, hey!

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37. We all checked in?

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38. Great, let's dump our stuff and meet back here in half an hour.

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39. Okay!

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40. What are you talking about?

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41. Step away from me, Michael.

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42. Great!

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43. What have you generated, Michael?

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44. What party?

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45. Michael, um... Jim and Josh are in meetings all day. And I am in and out of meetings. I can't stay on top of you 24/7.

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46. Really?

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47. Well, Michael, I underestimated you.

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48. Josh, um... Why don't you come up to my room for a couple of minutes and we can just go over the schedule for tomorrow together.

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49. A quick drink?

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50. Great!

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51. Hello?

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52. Hello?

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53. How would a movie increase productivity Michael? How on earth would it do that?

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54. Magically?

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55. No.

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56. Hello?

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57. Who is this?

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58. You should talk to Michael, and he'll talk to me, and that way we don't have to speak to each other.

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59. What about him?

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60. It's not about a surprise party is it?

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61. Look, I am already an hour outside of Scranton, Dwight, I'm not coming back.

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62. How do you know I like that store?

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63. How do you know that?

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64. No it's not. It's officially not.

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65. Yeah.

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66. Really?

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67. Ok.

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68. What would you do differently?

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69. Dwight, you must feel strongly, to speak with me this way, behind Michael's back, and turn on so many of your co-workers.

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70. Where is it?

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71. Michael.

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72. I just had a very interesting conversation with one of your employees.

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73. No, it wasn't. Dwight just told me that he thinks he can run the branch better than you.

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74. Mm-hmm.

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75. You can't have people undermining you. Get control of your branch immediately.

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76. Hey, Jim?

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77. How's work going?

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78. Oh, you know what, I gotta see Josh right now, but remind me to tell you what Dwight said to me earlier, okay? You'll get a big kick out of it.

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79. So, I wanted to let you know that we lost Ed Truck.

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80. Michael, Ed died over the weekend.

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81. I understand how you feel, Michael. I really do. So, would it be helpful to give everyone the day off?

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82. Well, what would you suggest?

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83. Of Ed?

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84. I'm not sure that's realistic.

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85. No, that's not---

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86. What the hell are you two talking about?

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87. You know what, Michael? I've really tried with you today...

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88. ...and I have to get back to work.

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89. So call me when you feel like having a real conversation.

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90. Goodbye.

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91. Ed Truck died over the weekend.

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92. Yeah. And I know... I know he was your boss, so I thought you should know.

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93. Yes, they know, Michael.

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94. I guess, yes. I think it would be appropriate for you to make an announcement to your team, in case they want to pay their respects.

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95. Good.

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96. Tell me what you did yesterday.

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97. Nothing?

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98. I don't care how your day was Michael.

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99. Tell me what you did yesterday.

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100. Hi, Pam.

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