Jan Levinson Quotes from The Office

Corporate VP, candle entrepreneur.

949 quotes · page 1 of 10

1. Just before lunch. That would be great.

   Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 30

2. Alright, was there anything you wanted to add to the agenda?

   Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 32

3. What? I'm sorry?

   Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 34

4. Well, I faxed one over to you this morning.

   Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 36

5. Do you want to look at mine?

   Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 42

6. OK. Since the last meeting, Ellen and the board have decided we can't justify a Scranton branch and a Stamford branch.

   Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 44

7. Michael, don't panic.

   Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 46

8. No, no, no, Michael, listen OK. Don't panic. We haven't made... We haven't decided.

   Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 48

9. I've spoken to Josh in Stamford. I've told him the same as you and it's up to either him or you to convince me that your branch can incorporate the other.

   Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 50

10. This does, however, mean that there is going to be downsizing.

    Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 52

11. Go ahead.

    Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 55

12. So do you think we could keep a lid on this for now? I don't want to worry people unnecessarily.

    Season 1 · Episode 1 · Quote 63

13. So, which health plan have you decided on?

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 577

14. Wait, acupuncture? None of the plans have acupuncture. Have you looked at them closely Michael?

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 579

15. The Gold Plan? I'm not even on that plan.

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 581

16. Michael.

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 583

17. You know the whole reason that we're doing this, is to save money. So you just need to pick a provider and choose the cheapest plan.

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 585

18. It's your job. So...

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 587

19. Michael... maybe... I mean...

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 589

20. Sometimes a manager, like yourself, has to deliver the bad news to the employees. I do it all the time.

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 591

21. I'm doing it right now. To you.

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 593

22. Hello?

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 755

23. This is Jan.

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 757

24. Who is this?

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 759

25. From sales?

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 761

26. Where's Michael Scott?

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 763

27. Dwight, listen to me very carefully. You are not a manager of anything. Understand?

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 765

28. Really?

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 767

29. OK, when Michael gets back, you tell him to call me immediately.

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 769

30. No. Please don't use my cell phone ever again.

    Season 1 · Episode 3 · Quote 771

31. Are you listening to me Michael?

    Season 1 · Episode 6 · Quote 1564

32. What did I just say?

    Season 1 · Episode 6 · Quote 1566

33. Alan and I have created an incentive program to increase sales.

    Season 1 · Episode 6 · Quote 1568

34. I'm not going to do that Michael.

    Season 1 · Episode 6 · Quote 1570

35. We've created an incentive program to increase sales.

    Season 1 · Episode 6 · Quote 1572

36. At the end of the month you can reward your top seller with a prize worth up to a thousand dollars.

    Season 1 · Episode 6 · Quote 1574

37. Uh, yes. Yes you can.

    Season 1 · Episode 6 · Quote 1576

38. No, Michael. No. You can't win this prize.

    Season 1 · Episode 6 · Quote 1578

39. It's a, it's, it's a two and a half hour drive from New York, Michael.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Quote 2041

40. No.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Quote 2043

41. No, we don't approve of this Michael. I mean, y-you only had the budget for one office party a year, so... we're not paying for this.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Quote 2045

42. Are you there Michael?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Quote 2048

43. Really? I'm dropping an atomic bomb on you?

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Quote 2053

44. You already had a party on May 5th for no reason.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Quote 2055

45. And you had a luau....

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Quote 2057

46. And a tsunami relief fundraiser which somehow lost a lot of money.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Quote 2059

47. Okay, well, I don't understand why anyone would have a tsunami FUN raiser, Michael. I mean, that doesn't even make sense.

    Season 2 · Episode 1 · Quote 2061

48. Yes. Yes, I did. Okay. Well, we can talk about that later then. Hi.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2573

49. You seem a little bit agitated, Michael. What's the problem?

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2582

50. Well, that... that's true in a way. You can't say anything.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2584

51. Do you need to see the video again, Michael?

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2586

52. Michael. MICHAEL!

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2595

53. Michael, please.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2597

54. Mike... Michael. Please. I... I... really.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2602

55. That's not my sense of humor.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2604

56. Wha...

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2606

57. 'Scuse me, I'm sorry. Michael. Mr. O'Malley is your lawyer.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2610

58. Mr. O'Malley is our Corporate lawyer. We have him on retainer. To protect the company as well as upper level management, such as yourself.

    Season 2 · Episode 2 · Quote 2612

59. This is Jan.

    Season 2 · Episode 5 · Quote 3835

60. Excuse me?

    Season 2 · Episode 5 · Quote 3837

61. Devon. The... Oh, is this the man that you...

    Season 2 · Episode 5 · Quote 3839

62. The person that you fired, Michael?

    Season 2 · Episode 5 · Quote 3841

63. Is that what you're... Okay. Oh, you sound a little... A little upset.

    Season 2 · Episode 5 · Quote 3843

64. Well, I have to say that I am impressed, Michael. I know... I know how hard that was.

    Season 2 · Episode 5 · Quote 3845

65. Well, I'm glad you did it, Michael.

    Season 2 · Episode 5 · Quote 3847

66. And so, good job. Good job.

    Season 2 · Episode 5 · Quote 3849

67. Yeah. Good job.

    Season 2 · Episode 5 · Quote 3851

68. Yup. Yes.

    Season 2 · Episode 5 · Quote 3853

69. This is a projection of the county's needs...

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4198

70. Thirteen schools, uh, two hospitals...

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4200

71. So when we get to the Radisson, I'd like to, um-

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4202

72. Excuse me?

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4204

73. You had no right to do that, Michael.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4206

74. It said that.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4208

75. Alright. But you will let me run this meeting.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4210

76. What?

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4212

77. Thank you.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4228

78. Michael, shouldn't take more than an hour.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4230

79. Do you always shut down the entire office when you leave for an hour?

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4232

80. So which way is Chili's?

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4234

81. Oh, no, that's alright. I wanna leave straight from there.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4236

82. I know Scranton.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4238

83. Alright.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4240

84. If it's a couple blocks away-

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4242

85. Ok.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4244

86. Why would we need a signal?

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4247

87. What kinda trouble are you planning on getting in, Michael?

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4249

88. You're gonna let me do the talking, we agreed on that.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4251

89. Just Jan Levinson.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4256

90. No. Thank you very much for meeting with us. Have you been waiting long?

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4258

91. Michael.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4261

92. Michael, we got divorced, ok? I'm so sorry. Excuse me.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4263

93. Michael. Uh, could we have a table for three, please?

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4265

94. We're in a meeting.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4267

95. Christian.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4270

96. I thought we could start by going over the needs of the county.

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4274

97. What?

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4277

98. So-

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4281

99. If you have a-

    Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4283

100. Christian, you don't have to listen to this.

     Season 2 · Episode 7 · Quote 4285