Jan Levinson Quotes from The Office (page 3)

Corporate VP, candle entrepreneur.

949 quotes · page 3 of 10

1. Brenda.

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2. Okay, you know, I'm gonna go now, and...

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3. Good luck, Brenda.

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4. Okay, see you later. And try to be professional.

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5. No, that's all right.

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6. You call me if you need anything, Brenda.

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7. So, I'm happy to be here. It's very nice to see all of you. You're all looking well.

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8. Women today, though we have the same options as men, we often face a very different set of obstacles in getting there. So...

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9. Michael... I thought we agreed you wouldn't be here.

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10. What are you doing?

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11. Michael.

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12. Michael.

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13. You are not allowed in this session.

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14. Now you're really not allowed in this session.

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15. I'm your boss.

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16. We're fine, Michael. We just need you to leave, please.

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17. Ladies, I am so, so sorry. Can we start again? We were on such a roll. I... I... really apologize.

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18. Yes, Pam?

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19. Michael!

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20. So one obstacle is how assertiveness is perceived differently in men and women. Men who are assertive will be admired. They're called... anyone?

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21. I don't know what you're doing here, Michael,

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22. ... but it's very destructive.

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23. Can you please do this somewhere else, Michael?

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24. Dwight, excellent idea. Go to the warehouse.

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25. I'm so sorry about that... um... so where were we? Pam, are you okay taking notes then?

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26. Please? Thank you. very much.

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27. Why don't we go around the table and all say something that we know we're good at. I will start. I am good at public speaking.

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28. Great. Phyllis?

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29. No. Okay. Stop. Go on...

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30. That is an excellent goal.

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31. Great! Uh-huh?

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32. Well, I'll be honest. One of the goals of these women seminars is to feel out if there's any standouts. Women who could be a valuable addition to our Corporate life.

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33. Great, great. And Pam, what about you? What is your dream?

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34. You know the company is offering a design training program in New York.

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35. Well, it's only on weekends and then a few weeks in New York, but I'm sure that I could ask Corporate to help you out.

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36. There are always a million reasons not to do something.

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37. All right. Let's talk about clothing.

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38. Dress for the job you want, not the job you have. All right. You can use your clothing to send a message about your ambitions by wearing clothes that reflect what you aspire to be.

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39. Another issue is inequality of pay between men and women. I'm sure that all of you have felt that before...

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40. What? A union! What...

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41. I'm not...

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42. The cons are that everyone will lose their job. Michael. Everyone. Office, Warehouse. What do you think... the... pros... are... here?

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43. You got yourself into this Michael, so you get yourself out.

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44. That's too bad.

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45. I don't want to...

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46. Michael! Michael! Michael!

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47. Michael.

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48. Don't say another word.

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49. Get yourself down stairs.

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50. Sports metaphors are one of the ways women feel left out of the language of the office. Now, I know this might sound silly but a ... many women ask to go over it. So... Fumble means...

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51. Right. Par for the course is a golf term. It means right on track. Below par means worse. Wait... that should mean better, that doesn't make sense.

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52. Excuse me?

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53. I don't know what Michael was talking about. I don't know.

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54. Kelly, I don't know what Michael's talking about.

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55. I'm divorced.

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56. It was. Yes.

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57. I think you should all spend a little more time thinking about your careers and less time on personal stuff.

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58. Okay. Let's take five. I think we can all use five.

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59. Did you take care of the situation?

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60. Excuse me.

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61. Excuse me. I've been told there's been some interest in forming a Union and that Michael supported it. Obviously he's not a friend of yours because he didn't tell you the facts. So let me. If there is even a whiff of unionizing in this branch, I can guarantee you the branch will be shut down like that. They unionized in Pittsfield and we all know what happened in Pittsfield. It will cost each of you a fortune in legal fees and union dues and that will be nothing compared to the cost of losing your jobs. So I would think long and hard before sacrificing your savings and your futures just to send a message. If you have any further questions you can direct them to... to Michael.

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62. Josh Porter, Stamford.

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63. And Michael Scott, Scranton.

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64. Fine Michael. Thank you.

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65. Nervous, no I'm not nervous. Well, I guess I'd be lying if I didn't say I was a little nervous. Umm, the new CFO is judging me on this too, and well, it is Michael, so. Yeah, I'm very nervous.

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66. OK. Craig,

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67. Um, I'm sorry, what did you think financial presentation meant?

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68. Craig, you realize that we're trying to decide whether if drastic steps need to be taken?

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69. Well, the point is, is that doesn't exactly bode well for your branch.

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70. NO, NO I'm not, I'm not, I just... I just don't know what to do anymore, Michael. I mean, we're all gonna get fired.

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71. Yeah, Michael - the CFO thinks that we slept together. Do you understand, people get fired for much less? And I just can't believe that you told everybody and we didn't even sleep together.

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72. Oh, God. Michael. It was months ago. It was once, It's over. Do you understand?

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73. Surely, you cannot be serious?

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74. Uh, that's fine. Let's just forget it.

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75. Oh, Michael. Thank you again for that, really. It was very nice.

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76. Oh, no, it's OK. So, uh, Happy valentine's Day.

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77. Oh.

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78. Hello, Michael.

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79. I'm... returning your call, you said it was urgent.

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80. Well, today's not my birthday, so...

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81. ...Happy birthday, Michael.

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82. Am I on camera?

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83. Michael, I'm gonna get going. I really don't think I need to be in this meeting.

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84. Yeah, but... Well, the fact of the matter is that your branch is currently number four of the five branches that I oversee.

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85. Michael?

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86. You know that I'm very serious here.

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87. What?

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88. I thought that you were their fearless leader.

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89. I think you can handle it.

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90. I think so, Michael...

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91. Goodbye, Michael.

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92. Michael?

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93. You know, I... I thought about it and you are right.

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94. I could use a little fun. So, I am going to drive up for your Casino Night.

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95. Incidentally, what is the charity?

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96. Okay, then. I will see you tonight.

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97. Bye-bye.

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98. Michael?

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99. Hi.

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100. What are you... Just... Wait, what're you talking about?

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