Every quote from The Office season 4, episode 14, in script order. First aired May 15, 2008.
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Kevin
Just hurry.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22397
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Holly
Is he okay?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22398
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Michael
Yeah. He's at the supermarket and he needs me.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22399
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Holly
Yeah well, the party, driving to the supermarket... it's a big day for him.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22400
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Michael
Yeah, that's true. Don't move a muscle. I will be back momentarily, all right? No, you can drink-you can finish your drink and then I'll-okay, I'll be back.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22401
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Jan
Well it was good to see you.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22402
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Kevin
It was great to see you, Jan.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22403
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Jan
Yeah, so...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22404
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Michael
O-kay. Hello Jan.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22405
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Jan
Hello... Michael.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22406
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Michael
Wow, Kevin, really? We're- Sorry. We're in the middle of a party. Is this why you called me down here?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22407
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Kevin
Yeah, Michael, I just uh...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22408
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Jan
I...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22409
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Kevin
I think you kids have a lot to catch up on.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22410
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Michael
Oh, okay.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22411
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Kevin
Yeah.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22412
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Michael
Thanks, Kevin. Um...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22413
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Michael
Wow. I can't believe it! Look at you! Are you nauseous?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22414
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Jan
No.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22415
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Michael
Do you-do you have cravings? You never touched my Propecea, or my Accutane, did you?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22416
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Jan
Uh, no.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22417
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Michael
Good. Good. Thank God.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22418
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Jan
I didn't...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22419
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Michael
Cause that's...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22420
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Jan
... touch that.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22421
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Michael
Wow, I am so happy. I am so deliriously happy...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22422
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Jan
Why?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22423
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Michael
Because you're pregnant, and because it obviously happened when we were together. And, I am very...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22424
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Jan
Yeah, it did...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22425
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Michael
... proud.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22426
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Jan
... happen when...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22427
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Michael
Um...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22428
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Jan
... we were together. That's true. And-but, you... are not... uh, you're not the dad.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22429
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Michael
You cheated on me... when I specifically asked you not to?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22430
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Jan
...Not to. No, I did not. I did not cheat on you. I did not.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22431
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Michael
Well, okay...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22432
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Jan
Yeah.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22433
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Michael
So it's mine, and it's not somebody else's, so... I know... the whole toilet seat thing is a myth, so...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22434
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Jan
I went to a sperm bank.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22435
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Michael
You did?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22436
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Jan
Yuh-huh.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22437
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Michael
When we were going out?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22438
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Jan
Uh, yeah.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22439
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Michael
W-I don't understand. You always used to be very cautious... I'd wear two condoms.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22440
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Jan
I know.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22441
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Michael
You'd rather have somebody else's sperm than my sperm?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22442
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Jan
No, no no... it's not just any sperm bank. I mean, it's really... this is a really, really great place. It's amazing, actually. I'm gonna bring you the catalogue. You should look through it. It's... and it's-in fact, it's right next to that little breakfast place that you like in the city where you can draw on the tables.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22443
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Michael
IHop.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22444
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Jan
IHop.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22445
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Jan
If I was 22, and I had lots of time to have lots of children, then sure, let's let Michael have a shot at one of 'em. But, honestly, I need to make this one count.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22446
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Jan
Oh, that's really good. I feel so much better. I just needed to get all that out onto the table.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22447
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Michael
I'm glad you told me.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22448
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Jan
Look, I don't know what you're gonna be doing tomorrow, but I have my Lamaze class in Allentown, and um... you could come. I usually, you know, use a foam noodle instead of a partner...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22449
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Michael
Um, I'll... I have to think about it.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22450
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Jan
Okay.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22451
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Michael
My whole life, I have known two things: I love sex, and I want to have kids. And I always thought that those two things would go hand in hand, but now, I think it might be one or the other.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22452
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Pam
Oh look, they're starting.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22453
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Angela
Well, I hope you had fun today, because you're never ever throwing a party again.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22454
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Jim
Hey...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22455
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Andy
Can I have your attention please? I was waiting for the right time to do this, and I can't think of a better time than right now, with the music playing, and all our friends around, and fireworks going off... My parents are here! Andrew and Ellen Bernard. Thank you for sharing in this joyous moment. Miss Angela Martin, will you please join me onstage? Okay, then I will come to you, my flower.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22456
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Darryl
Unh! Damn it!
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22457
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Andy
Angela, will you do me the honor... of giving me your tiny hand in marriage?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22458
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Angela
...Okay.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22459
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Andy
Into the mic, sweetie.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22460
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Angela
I said, okay.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22461
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Andy
She said yes! And the crowd goes wild! Woo!
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22462
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Andy
I've been carrying that ring around in my wallet for six years. Because you don't know when you're gonna meet the right girl and the moment's gonna be right. And tonight, with the fireworks, and the music, and everything... it was right.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22463
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Kelly
Can I be your bridesmaid?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22464
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Angela
No.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22465
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Dwight
Well... it's my own fault.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22466
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Andy
Tuna! I'm engaged!
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22467
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Jim
I know. That's awesome, man. That's great.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22468
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Andy
Mr. Andrew Bernard... it's got a nice ring to it.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22469
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Toby
Hey. Hey, you know, I just realized uh, I don't have a picture of the two of us.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22470
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Pam
Oh, yeah, um...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22471
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Toby
Yeah, could we...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22472
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Pam
Sure. Meredith, do you mind?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22473
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Toby
This one right here.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22474
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Meredith
Okay. One two three- Oh let's do it again. Pam your smile is weird.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22475
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Toby
It's digital, so just take as many as you want.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22476
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Meredith
One, two three- One, two, three-
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22477
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Pam
I don't know, I just, I really thought Jim was gonna propose tonight...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22478
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Holly
Hey there.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22479
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Michael
Hey.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22480
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Holly
So you missed something really big.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22481
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Michael
Yeah?
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22482
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Holly
Yeah, Andy proposed to one of your accountants.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22483
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Michael
Oh, wow.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22484
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Holly
I'm not so specific as I can be on my first day, but...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22485
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Michael
Well, I can see Andy proposing to Angela. I can also see him proposing to Oscar. Oh...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22486
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Holly
So... You know, somehow after all those ribs, I'm still really hungry. I don't know, I was thinking of maybe going off-campus somewhere, getting some dessert, or...
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22487
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Michael
Oh, um, well, you know what? You should go to the Glider Diner. Ask Stanley about that. Practically lives there.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22488
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Holly
Okay.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22489
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Kevin
I'll go to the diner with you.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22490
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Holly
Oh that would be great.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22491
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Kevin
Yeah, we can go eat pie.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22492
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Holly
I love pie.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22493
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Kevin
Me too.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22494
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Holly
Okay.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22495
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Michael
Have a good night.
Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22496