Kevin Malone Quotes from The Office (page 11)

Accountant, band frontman, chili enthusiast.

1,708 quotes · page 11 of 18

1. Pam. Can you vote for other people?

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2. I cancelled my plans to come to this thing, and they repay me with this?

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3. With what? How? Sometimes, Michael. Sometimes.

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4. Give me the baby!

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5. Look at these scones, Jim. Thousands of them. What kind of a person steals scones from a baby?

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6. They should do that thing where they play the really good music to get him to come out.

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7. No! I bet he's wishing he was strangling someone!

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8. Hey, you going tonight?

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9. Yeah! You gotta go to the boss's party!

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10. No he's not the boss.

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11. Cause, you're the boss!

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12. I wanted to eat a pig in a blanket, in a blanket!

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13. I can't believe we're missing that!

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14. Please Michael, just make the Glee happen!

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15. Big Boobs.

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16. Wow.

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17. Commission comes out to... dunh-duh-na-dah! Zero.

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18. I entered the sale, and I hit enter, and I said, 'dunh-duh-na-dah!' I'm pretty sure I timesed it right.

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19. Dunh-duh-na-dah!

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20. You had me at 'Sex.'

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21. Awesome!

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22. You guys know how to get out?

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23. Help! Hello?! Oh! Help![runs around the maze]

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24. An antacid that you only take once a week.

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25. Michael! An antacid pill that you take once every six weeks.

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26. It's too big of a pill to swallow.

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27. Thank God.

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28. Uh oh, getting nervous Oscar?

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29. Well, I wish for a million wishes.

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30. Then see you later building.

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31. I said see you later building.

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32. Oh, I got it, you guys, how 'bout this. Michael, what if all the boys are on one side, all the girls are on the other. The boys are like, 'why I oughta', and the girls are like, 'let's go shopping!'.

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33. Angela, are you bringing you new boyfriend to the party.

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34. Oh, right. The state senator.

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35. Oh, that would be impressive... if

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36. I would, but I don't want to get dirty. There might be girls at the party.

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37. Yeah.

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38. Hi, Toby.

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39. Yeah.

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40. Did you bring us anything from Nashua?

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41. Wait, wait, guys, listen. Toy Story is all about toys that come to life when people aren't looking. You don't think... it's not possible... that Woody did this to himself.

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42. Oh no, that's, that's not happening.

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43. Oh, nothing is ever your fault! Just like when you ate those maple candies that you brought for us!

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44. I bet you didn't even bring us anything, did you?

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45. For your feet!

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46. Wow, that's awesome!

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47. Congratu-ohhh.

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48. Hey! Right back atcha, bitch!

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49. Well, I said that I would eat more vegetables, and I haven't yet. But it's okay. I still have time, since last year, I ate none.

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50. Well not all of us are Michael Freaking Scott.

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51. I don't know. I'm glad this is happening. Thank you, Michael.

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52. This is a new food for me, how else should I eat it?

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53. Can I get some cheese whiz? Or hollandaise?

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54. God, I hate it.

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55. All right, I ate the fluffy part, can I be done?

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56. Can I get some candy, or something?

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57. You were super mean.

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58. It was traumatizing, Michael. I wouldn't be surprised if I never ate a vegetable again.

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59. Okay, Michael, no offense, but you need to get your own life.

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60. Well, I am.

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61. I'm going to help you.

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62. Hey, Ryan.

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63. How's your fart project coming?

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64. Me.

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65. Hey, Ryan.

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66. Andy, I'm no Jim. The only way that I'm Jim is in the movie version when Jim sees what his future would be like if he never met Pam.

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67. Then I won't let you down.

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68. Yep.

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69. Go.

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70. Yes!

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71. There are some people who have charm and some people who don't. Guess which type I am. Charm type.

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72. Dream... big. Right? So what I want you to do is dream the biggest that you c... an. And then double it!.

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73. No. Yes!

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74. No. I'm fine. Okay, from here now. The first lesson that I'm gonna teach you, right, is about finding success. And the key to finding success is to picture a winner.. Okay, so then, what are you picturing right now, right this second? 'Cause the universe is yours, people. Get out of the way!

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75. What?

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76. Red gloves.

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77. I can't wait.

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78. Ok, it's two giant dogs with two giant palm trees on a regular size island.

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79. Ditto.

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80. Nice!

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81. Yes, well done!

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82. I don't know, guys. I, for one, enjoy watching them, because...

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83. Can I finish? Can I finish? Is that okay? I was saying...I enjoy watching them because it makes me horny.

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84. Oooh.

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85. Booby honking.

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86. Butt honking.

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87. As has Kevin!

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88. She goes to another school.

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89. Yeah, I agree. This is nasty.

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90. Hey, buck up, buddy!

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91. Which one? I have a lot of stupid faces.

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92. Better luck next time, pal.

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93. Suck it, Oscar. This must kill you.

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94. Pizza, soda, the moon, someone to share it with.

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95. It's like one of the best movies I've ever seen in my life.

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96. Or carnivals!

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97. You're eating eight year old tomatoes?

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98. I've got some cheese you might like too. In between my toes.

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99. Yes!

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100. Nice! We got burned!

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