Jim Halpert Quotes from The Office (page 54)

Salesman, prank enthusiast, permanent camera confidant.

6,816 quotes · page 54 of 69

1. I'm so sorry, I think I forgot that thing...

   Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46862

2. Whoo.

   Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46864

3. Hey, I have a question. Who do you think is really the best salesman in this office?

   Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46866

4. Chapter seven: The host should always present something spectacular to draw the eye of his guests.

   Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46879

5. I don't know if I can.

   Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46918

6. Alright.

   Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46921

7. I know, I know, I know. But Darryl and Kevin needed a third. They bought me this jersey. I said no. Kevin started crying. So, I am Chris Bosh.

   Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46922

8. No! My wife does not believe in ghosts.

   Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46955

9. Hey.

   Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46956

10. Oh, this Man In Black thing, what do you think that was about?

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46958

11. Was it, like, trickery in the lights, or maybe you were so primed to see it, then there it was?

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46960

12. Mmhmm. No, but what I'm saying is, like, do you ever wonder what it was?

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46962

13. Yeah, I had just told you about the day that I met the Blue Angels. I figured you had to top it.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46964

14. Hey it's Jim Halpert. I was wondering if you wanted to see a movie tonight. Because I've read a lot about this really great documentary.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47038

15. It's called Ghostbusters.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47040

16. It didn't have a buster sign around him? Why don't you draw him? Why don't we see this whole thing.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47042

17. I ain't fraid of no ghost. Whoa!

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47044

18. You know that's'

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47054

19. I was talking about my wife and how she believes in ghosts. And then we had a little debate and Meredith said she believes in them too.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47056

20. Party looks fun doesn't it? Everybody seems to be in there having a great time. So maybe now would be a great time for me to pop back on the computer.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47065

21. Are you serious?

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47067

22. That's funny. Ok.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47069

23. Thank you.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47109

24. Careful, whoa. First of all, it's not like I think that's going to help the Eagles win.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47111

25. No. That is just a bunch of people participating in a collective thing that maybe the Eagles will hear about and want to play better. It's not...

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47113

26. Thank you.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47115

27. Like, a few years down the road, Cece says, 'Mom, there's a ghost in my closet.' Now, you say one of two things - one, 'You're just having a bad dream,' or two, 'Let's go see what it was.'

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47137

28. Ok.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47139

29. Oh, come on!

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47141

30. Pink is the red-

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47159

31. I was talking about my wife, and how she believes in ghosts. And then we had a little debate. Meredith said she believes in them too.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47161

32. Oscar, how are you on that side?

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47180

33. But that would make more sense.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47184

34. ...W R K.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47190

35. Uh no it's W R K, as in kitten. Oh my boss is singing Closing Time, maybe that's what you are hearing.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47192

36. I'm just saying with the NBA lockout I think roller derby's in a really good place now. So'my pitch is'me, Pam, you and, someone else maybe Justine.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47221

37. Is that off again?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47223

38. Ok.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47225

39. Wait, so you installed a doomsday device?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47270

40. Which when it goes off it destroys everything. Very similar to a doomsday device.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47272

41. Dwight, question.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47309

42. If this doomsday device goes off...

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47311

43. If this bad idea goes off and we all lose our jobs. Are you going to feel good about that?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47313

44. Ok.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47317

45. Nope.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47319

46. Hmm'Heda. No.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47322

47. Ok, where is he?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47372

48. I'll try both.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47374

49. Robert.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47386

50. Yeah, well, you know just had a meeting. Squash meeting.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47388

51. You up for a game?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47390

52. Exactly. Here we go. Let's do it.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47392

53. Alright. Serving. Serving. Serving. Serving.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47412

54. In the box.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47414

55. Is that my phone?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47440

56. Nah, I think it's mine. Lemme just check real quick, here. Alright.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47442

57. Oh, oh yeah.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47444

58. Yes. Right now? Yes.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47446

59. Here you go.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47448

60. Awww, sorry. Did it break?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47451

61. You sure?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47453

62. What kinda iPhone is that?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47455

63. Oh yeah. I have the one that nobody has. Is there anything interesting?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47457

64. Ha ha. No, I don't. No, I don't. Alright, well, I am sore and obviously horrible at this, so-

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47459

65. Ah! Classic, right?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47469

66. I'm alright.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47471

67. Yep.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47473

68. Yep. Ah. Oh.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47475

69. Yeah. That does not feel good.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47477

70. Ok, he didn't fix it. The brightness level was all the way down.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47483

71. I wasn't here that day.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47485

72. No- Ok. Well, we'll talk about it later. Straussburg! I had a meeting in Straussburg and I dropped you off beforehand. I was wearing a tan shirt with stripes?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47487

73. Ok, this is crazy.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47489

74. I have never played squash. But I have seen it in countless 80's movies and it seems like the most common mistake is that you serve too hard and hit yourself right in the squash balls. So, as long as I don't do that, I think I'll be alright.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47490

75. Good game. You are a worthy opponent. You wanna play one more?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47492

76. No? Come on.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47494

77. Well, that is... because you didn't realize that... I was left-handed.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47496

78. Hmm. Doubt it.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47565

79. What's that?

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47568

80. Honestly I have no idea. I just figured we'd save her from Ryan right?

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47570

81. Hey.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47625

82. Yeah. Super pretty.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47627

83. The temp?

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47629

84. Nope.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47631

85. And I'm telling you, I don't.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47633

86. No, I don't.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47635

87. No, I'm not going to tell my nine-months-pregnant wife that I find her replacement objectively attractive. Just like I'm not going to tell my two-year-old daughter that violent video games are objectively more fun. It's true, but it doesn't help anybody.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47636

88. Okay. Uh, I don't. So are we good?

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47638

89. Oh, I stand corrected.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47687

90. Oh, you know who might be good? Mike Tibbets.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47689

91. Mm-hmm.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47691

92. Not his mom's car.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47693

93. Touche?

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47695

94. Mike Tibbets is like the most boring-looking guy I know. So if that was for the matchmaker test, I think I'm in the clear. If that wasn't for the matchmaker test, then... Cathy, he's a really nice guy.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47707

95. Dwight!

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47728

96. Dwight! Dwight!

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47731

97. Sorry about that.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47733

98. Dwight! Why?

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47735

99. Leave.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47737

100. Mm-hmm?

     Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47744