Jim Halpert Quotes from The Office (page 53)

Salesman, prank enthusiast, permanent camera confidant.

6,816 quotes · page 53 of 69

1. He brings up two good points. Do you have any new leads? Any new territories you want us to look into? Maybe have an in with a big client that we can get our foot in the door?

   Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46114

2. New leads, a new territory to look into, maybe an in with a big company that we could get our foot in the door'

   Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46118

3. She looks at it when she's on the potty, and she makes the faces.

   Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46146

4. We know that.

   Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46151

5. You have a walking buddy.

   Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46156

6. What if we went all the way up to five hundred points?

   Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46179

7. But, what if?

   Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46181

8. I don't know, for such a crazy number I'd like something pretty crazy.

   Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46183

9. That's pretty good. What about uh, for a thousand points?

   Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46185

10. Alright, alright. And you are totally serious?

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46189

11. Wait. You did say we could pool our points, right? In that case'let's get to work.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46191

12. [on the phone]I can have it to you by the beginning of next week. Alright? Thanks very much. Uh, Phyllis! Bracken Auto?

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46194

13. Ok.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46196

14. Andrew.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46198

15. No, I didn't notice anything.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46200

16. I don't know what to tell you, man.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46203

17. Oh, one hundred percent. We all want to see you tattoo your ass.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46205

18. Nah, you definitely weren't kidding. And that came across loud and clear. Oh, by the way, I want to hand this in.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46207

19. Yeah. Big sale. Don't worry about it though, I don't really care about the points. I would like a point receipt though'Hey! Yes, this is Jim Halpert calling for Donald'can you hold on for one second? Thank you very much.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46209

20. [on the phone]and I'm back. How are you sir?....I think we can squeeze a couple more golf games in, right?

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46212

21. Gettin' psyched up?

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46236

22. Andy, nobody really expects you to go through with this'

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46238

23. I mean, do you like it? You having fun? Tell you this, everybody else is having a lot of fun'.and you did that.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46240

24. But I think it's big enough to buy you some time till your next great idea'.which, by the way, I can't wait for.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46242

25. Absolutely not.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46244

26. Pull up your pants.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46265

27. I'd hang on to it though, cause I can think of a bunch. Like a 70's theme party, or a 70's theme meeting, or a 70's theme convention...

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46289

28. 1870's...

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46291

29. Nope, he means tuna dog.

    Season 8 · Episode 2 · Quote 46295

30. Do Snowboarders hate animals?

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46314

31. Dwight! At least aim it.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46322

32. Whoa whoa whoa whoa!

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46328

33. Alright! Nice job, Oscar!

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46331

34. So...ah, who's gonna take the dog?

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46333

35. What if he jumps out the window and runs away?

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46335

36. Oscar, what do you wanna do, this is kinda your deal. You wanna dog?

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46340

37. Yeah, that's pretty good.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46342

38. Nice job.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46345

39. Oh man, it's gotta be over a hundred thousand dollars.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46350

40. I mean, I don't even know what I'd do with all that money.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46361

41. No, I'd probably buy a big piece of land in Maine, build a house, work in town. Somewhere I could bike to or kayak to. I'd either bike to my job at the kayak shop or kayak to my job at the bike shop.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46363

42. Whoa. Saucy. I thought you liked Maine?

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46365

43. Which ideally would be me....

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46371

44. Stop. I'm a barista in your fantasy?

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46373

45. I don't know about Stephen King, I mean...

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46375

46. Uh, yeah. I mean, as the strongest person in this office, I guess I should go down with you...

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46397

47. OK. Three hundred boxes of twenty pound white. That's seventy-five boxes per person, so that's not so bad.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46419

48. Nice. Whoa whoa whoa whoa! Oh!

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46421

49. There's gotta be a better way to do this. This is literally how they built the pyramids.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46467

50. Yeah Not that they're not smart people.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46469

51. I'd go with that.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46471

52. Not that, don't...

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46473

53. It's a great idea Kev, I don't think it applies here though, so maybe we just-

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46475

54. Our fake winnings

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46500

55. It is, yeah. I mean I just don't know why I'm compromising if it's my fantasy. Cause in my fantasy it's Maine and you love it.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46502

56. Nope. You're, you're doing a great job of it in my fantasy right now.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46504

57. A...hot chocolate tea

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46506

58. Kevin Costner.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46517

59. Yeah.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46519

60. So, it's not the dumbest idea.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46522

61. But, the fact remains we gotta move these boxes.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46524

62. So sadly, it's the best idea on the table.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46526

63. Is he OK?

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46529

64. OK, alright, that's...look. All we were trying to do is we thought we could come up with a more efficient way to do things.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46567

65. That's alright.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46572

66. Doesn't matter what the name is. Senor Loadenstein, that's stupid.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46574

67. That's OK, we're good.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46576

68. Porque es muy rapido.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46579

69. Right. It's city and country combined.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46590

70. And I can fish right from the window of Pam's pottery studio. And we can chat any time we want.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46592

71. Just like now....too bad the schools are terrible.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46594

72. But what are you gonna do about that?

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46596

73. Ok, ok. We are so close. All we have to do is figure out that corner and we're basically there.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46601

74. Ok, Dwight! Come on. Here, I think I have an idea.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46605

75. Dammit Dwight!

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46609

76. Ok, I have a question. Why is the truck so far away?

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46611

77. Ok, I just asked that ques-, I don't know. I mean it seems like the door is huge, right? So you should be able to back the truck up to the paper.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46614

78. So this warehouse has been around for what? Like a thousand years? And they never thought to back the truck up into it? I guess sometimes it just takes a fresh set of eyes. Alright!

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46616

79. Whoa whoa whoa!

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46620

80. No! Stop! Stop stop stop stop! You're way over! Ok, you gotta cut it! Cut it hard! (bleep!) Stop stop stop stop! Stop, stop! Dammit Dwight. Great.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46624

81. Good.

    Season 8 · Episode 3 · Quote 46626

82. Hey. So, we saw a new billboard.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46627

83. You've seen it, right?

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46631

84. There's this thing that people tend to do with billboards. How do I put this? If there's an opportunity for a graffiti artist to work in a... phallic shape, interacting with the artwork, it'll happen, and Andy gave them that opportunity.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46635

85. Okay, don't be gross.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46642

86. Ah, and did Robert California get an invite to your party?

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46675

87. So, we've typed in the address, now let's take a look at the street view.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46681

88. Ah. Why do you keep reading that garden party book? I mean, how hard are finger sandwiches and tea?

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46683

89. I'm actually really disappointed in how poorly my book is doing. I've only sold one copy.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46686

90. Chapter 2 ' Announcing guests as they enter is the height of decorum. The more volume displayed, the more honor is bestowed upon everyone present.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46719

91. Oh, hey, how are you doing, I'm Jim.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46745

92. No.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46747

93. No, no, no, no, no. No.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46749

94. Chapter 4 ' One of the host's most important duties is as Dance Master. A proper courtly dance sets the tone for the entire afternoon.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46753

95. Chapter 9 ' The tableau vivant is not only welcomed, but expected entertainment at any garden party.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46781

96. Closing ceremonies.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46852

97. I think I left my wallet in your house.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46854

98. Right here.

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46856

99. Keys, keys...

    Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46858

100. I didn't forget them, they're right here.

     Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46860