Jim Halpert Quotes from The Office (page 52)

Salesman, prank enthusiast, permanent camera confidant.

6,816 quotes · page 52 of 69

1. He's an amazing man. He's a Rhodes Scholar. He invented an app that invents apps. Fantastic kisser...

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2. Darryl! We all know you. Your interview is not nearly as important as the other guys.

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3. That's very interesting. Um, I feel like there might be a conflict there, and if a conflict did arise, how would that be dealt with?

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4. I think that's probably all we need to hear from...

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5. That's very...

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6. You know what? They all just sort of blend together after a while.

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7. No, not at all. In fact, I'm not even taking it seriously. I think at the end of the day, I'm just gonna pick a name out of the hat.

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8. Uh--

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9. Okay, everybody, I was just making a joke. I am taking it seriously, I promise.

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10. No, was it good?

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11. Oh, I know this guy. Hello! Mr. 'Soo-ven-yay.' Mr. 'Jacques Soo-ven-yay.' Nice to meet you. It says here you're French. So you worked at your last job for 15 years as Assistant to the Regional Manager.

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12. Assistant to the Regional Manager.

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13. What is it?

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14. Oh, that's my mistake, sorry about that. The last paper company you worked for burned to the ground? And all because they wouldn't hire a manager who lived and breathed paper? That's a travesty.

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15. No. No! Wait, but, I mean, you're Dwight, and then... he's the...

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16. Ohhhh!

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17. This guy was good. Although, he did keep saying that he needed two weeks off right at the beginning for a trip to the finger lakes. Seriously. Every five minutes, he was like, 'just making sure the finger lakes thing is clear.'

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18. Finger Lakes guy is good. Darryl is also very good.

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19. Um... why Kelly?

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20. Okay.

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21. Oh, I didn't know you knew her?

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22. No.

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23. You know, she also gave me a reason to think that maybe she wasn't a good fit.

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24. All right. Name.

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25. Thank you, Mr. Schnoot. We will let you know.

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26. I just did. The answer to that one question told me everything I need to know.

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27. All right, guys, good day, a lot of candidates. Let's discuss.

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28. Yes.

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29. Thank you, Dwight.

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30. Well, that was quick.

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31. He's not a real candidate.

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32. You took the deal.

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33. That's not okay.

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34. What is happening right now?

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35. No, why would you think that?

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36. Okay. Okay, guys, just so you all know, no decision has been made, and Dwight is definitely not the boss.

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37. No, no, no. Not ever, 'cause that's not gonna happen.

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38. Am I the only one who remembers what he did when he was in charge? I feel like I'm going a little bit crazy.

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39. Thank you.

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40. Okay, seems like everybody has an opinion. So, who else? Anybody?

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41. I suppose I am.

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42. Yes.

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43. Okay.

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44. Perfect. There are several outside candidates that we think would be really-

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45. Hey! Hey! Hey!

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46. What about Darryl? We can all agree that he's a stand-up guy, right?

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47. What? No, no, it's not a vote.

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48. I don't know. This conversation really got away from me.

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49. No, they can't. That's not how this is gonna work. We're going in this room, we're going to have a meeting. We're gonna make a recommendation to Jo, and she's gonna give you her recommendation on Monday. Okay? What the hell happened out there?

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50. The Search Committee finally decided, after a lot of deliberation, on Robert California... for the manager position. Who took one look around and left... He drove down to Florida and convinced Joe to make him CEO... CEO... her own job. He talked her out of her own job. And I don't really know how someone does that. But, anyway, then the position was his to fill. And he chose...

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51. Oh, yeah. Pregnant.

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52. No, I told you I don't like that joke. It is a boy. We found out early.

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53. No one should be planking at all.

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54. You watching that commercial again? Why do you keep watching it, if you know it's just gonna make you cry?

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55. He's got a bank vault. That's a start.

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56. The new CEO works out of the conference room about half the time. But whenever he takes a break, he does these weird walks around the office. And you never know who he's gonna zero in on for these really intense small-talks. You just hope it's not you. And yet, you hope it is you too. It's strange.

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57. Can I call you right back? Thank you very much. Okay. What is this?

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58. It's, it's nothing.

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59. It's just a list of our names, split into two columns.

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60. Okay, just wait one second, alright? I will copy it. Do you have a pen?

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61. No. Okay. Um, I'll take a photo of it. Dwight, can you throw me my phone?

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62. We don't need a warning signal, Kevin. We can see him right there-

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63. I promise you, we don't need a warning-

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64. Left.

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65. Why are you- How do you know?

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66. Uh, no, actually. That was in Robert's notebook.

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67. Okay, it's not that Pam. You know, I was thinking it reminds me of those lists Dwight used to make.

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68. I don't think it's-

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69. That's not it.

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70. Mmum, still wrong.

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71. Wait, wait, wait! Stop! Stop! Stop! Will you stop?!

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72. Alright, well, I will see you in a bit.

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73. Hey. It's nothing. Alright? I'll text you when we get there. Let you know what's going on.

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74. Nope. No dog video.

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75. Okay. See you guys.

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76. Uhhh, the street?

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77. Oh, I didn't know anybody called it- She likes it a lot- she, uh, loves Elmo.

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78. Right.

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79. Yeah, she does like Elmo.

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80. Well, that was certainly an odd lunch. Is everything alright?

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81. Shhh.

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82. Alright, I'm gonna go warm up the car.

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83. Ryan? A little help?

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84. Uh, I will have the chicken piccata with a side salad.

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85. Good. What? Nothin'

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86. I don't think we have to do this again cause it's gonna take a whole.

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87. Come on, man.

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88. Hey, so this isn't matching up with this'and I'm not sure which one's right. Can you just hunt down the original for me?

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89. Alright.

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90. Hey Kev, what were you saying before about the paperwork?

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91. Yeah, alright Kev why don't you come with us?

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92. Does it save time though? 'Cause we've been here for about an hour.

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93. K, Kevin, are you saying 'See the world'? or 'Sea World?'

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94. No, see? Right there, that's the problem with your method. 'Cause I still don't know if you're saying 'Sea World' or 'see the world,' and it's taking a lot of time to explain it.

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95. How many L to a K?

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96. I'll take five.

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97. Your ex-wife?

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98. Wow. Alright. Can't wait to meet her.

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99. Hey.

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100. Why don't you start?

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