Jim Halpert Quotes from The Office (page 46)

Salesman, prank enthusiast, permanent camera confidant.

6,816 quotes · page 46 of 69

1. Ok.

   Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38717

2. Wait, wait, wait. That's actually a really good idea Kelly.

   Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38724

3. Dwight, how about this? Instead of boycotting, you and I, together, go down to that store and we teach those snobs a lesson.

   Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38727

4. Alright.

   Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38730

5. No, no. I want to hear you tell it.

   Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38746

6. Before me stands your coworker, Dwight Kurt Schrute. Dwight, show them all sides. Turn around. Now, today, we need your help turning Dwight into a gentleman.

   Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38773

7. No, this is instead of the boycott. Yeah?

   Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38776

8. Agreed.

   Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38778

9. We present to you for your comments and approval, Dwight K. Shrute.

   Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38811

10. Wish us luck!

    Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38813

11. Is that what you were here for? A crystal wizard? I like it.

    Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38883

12. Wait a second. You know you can't buy that now, right? And I can come back and get it for you later. But I'm saying right now, we can't do that.

    Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38885

13. That's it.

    Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38887

14. Stop, stop, stop.

    Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38894

15. Did you just say you remember him?

    Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38896

16. What does that mean?

    Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38898

17. Lets just go.

    Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38907

18. There it is. Alright.

    Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38909

19. That's pretty good.

    Season 7 · Episode 2 · Quote 38911

20. Yes!

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 38923

21. It's my own fault-

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 38971

22. Really?

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 38975

23. For a lot of reasons.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 38979

24. You should actually thank Erin, she's the one who agreed to babysit.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 38991

25. Everything's fine.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39029

26. We can relax. Let's get our Sweeney on.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39031

27. Okay, I think everybody just needs to relax.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39052

28. Oh, my God.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39054

29. Okay, this was pretty simple-

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39057

30. Really, all you had to do was play with her for, like, 30 minutes and then put her to bed.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39059

31. Well, the car seat was to take her to the hospital, or...

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39062

32. No, we're good. Thank you, though.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39066

33. Alright, well, we're never leaving the house again.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39069

34. It's like The Hurt Locker!

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39119

35. No, it was not a disaster. It was weird, but it wasn't a disaster. I think we have, like, a gift bottle of Irish cream.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39121

36. We could put that in orange juice.

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39123

37. Yeah?

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39125

38. Yeah!

    Season 7 · Episode 3 · Quote 39127

39. That was like, ten years ago.

    Season 7 · Episode 4 · Quote 39216

40. Nope, it's because it's genitalia.

    Season 7 · Episode 4 · Quote 39321

41. Am I blocking anybody? Can everybody see?

    Season 7 · Episode 4 · Quote 39323

42. Good!

    Season 7 · Episode 4 · Quote 39362

43. Are you sure you once knew how to do this?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39492

44. Just steer more now.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39497

45. No! No!

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39500

46. Amazing. How do I look?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39503

47. Well, I do the best with what I've got. Let's go.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39505

48. He's not the Steve Nash. He's big though. He's kind of like...Scranton's Steve Nash.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39508

49. I'm not doing that. I'm just explaining.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39510

50. Phoenix Sun's point guard?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39512

51. No? Nothin'?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39514

52. Well, I'm neither of those things, so...

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39516

53. Oh, ha ha ha. Dwight...[motions to lobby]

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39527

54. Well, by worst, you mean the best.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39530

55. So, the situation is the worst.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39532

56. No, he didn't.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39534

57. Tell 'em.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39535

58. What? He never called you? I thought you said it just fizzled.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39537

59. Yeah, I thought you started it.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39539

60. Ahhh.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39541

61. Okay, great-

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39543

62. -I'm just gonna watch.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39545

63. How are ya?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39548

64. Dwight!

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39553

65. Hey, it's Jim. Listen, this is important. Are you busy?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39556

66. Listen, you gotta get over here, 'cause we're pitching Steve Nash and Danny Cordray is here.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39561

67. Yes.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39563

68. The big gun thing. Stop!

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39565

69. No, that's him.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39588

70. Nope, not doing that.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39600

71. Showtime!

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39603

72. No, I didn't.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39619

73. Is that your office?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39634

74. A what?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39640

75. I think you mean The Sting.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39642

76. Nope. Different movie.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39644

77. Meredith was the perfect choice to play the head of the company. Her lunch break lined up with our appointment with Danny and...that's it. That's really all we were looking for.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39648

78. Meredith Van Helsing?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39651

79. Okay. But what is he more famous for?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39653

80. You know this isn't real TV, right?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39655

81. Okay, he's not that good-looking. I don't understand why everybody's obsessed with this-

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39676

82. We gotta get someone else in there right now.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39707

83. You're an exec at Pennsylvania Solartech and-

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39708

84. What do you mean?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39710

85. Will you stop? Stop it, stop it. Here's the story-they need Meredith somewhere else asap, okay?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39712

86. So you're taking over. You just gotta get her out of there as soon as you can.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39714

87. Yes.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39717

88. Exactly. You can do this.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39719

89. Stop it! It's gonna be great.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39721

90. And listen if anything else happens, just...roll with it.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39723

91. Who else we got?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39729

92. Great. Sounds awesome. Just have him pitch to you.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39732

93. No, no, no, no...

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39740

94. No, no, no, no.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39759

95. Michael, I think you really want to talk to him.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39794

96. You hired him?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39797

97. Did ya?

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39830

98. I'm just kidding. She told me about it.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39832

99. Oh.

    Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39834

100. Dwight, please.

     Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39837