Jim Halpert Quotes from The Office (page 29)

Salesman, prank enthusiast, permanent camera confidant.

6,816 quotes · page 29 of 69

1. Yeah, I'd say she's happy. I mean, she loves her classes. Loves the city. I mean, last night, she was out with her friends, till, like, 8:00 AM.

   Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 23976

2. What?

   Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 23978

3. I am going to see Pam. Because I feel like I should.

   Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 23980

4. No. you know what? No. Because... I'm not that guy. And we are not that couple.

   Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24023

5. I just don't know if he's presidential enough.

   Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24036

6. Cranford? No. We will never watch that.

   Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24039

7. Ah, I'm sure they're all great.

   Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24041

8. Let's start with the wildcard.

   Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24043

9. Mmm-hmm.

   Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24045

10. Uh-oh.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24047

11. I think I got a pretty good sense of that one.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24049

12. Yep.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24051

13. Let's move on to the next.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24053

14. Mmm-hmm.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24055

15. Oh, that's good.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24057

16. I like the wild card. I'm already liking the wild card.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24059

17. Mmm-hmm.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24061

18. Have you asked her what she wants to do?

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24063

19. No. You got that backwards.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 24065

20. Dave.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24085

21. You are? A cat?

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24087

22. Oh, hang on one second. Jim Halpert.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24089

23. Hey New York, Happy Halloween!

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24091

24. Oh, I'll walk you out.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24108

25. All right. We'll see. No.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24111

26. I am off to New York. My brother Pete from Boston, and my brother Tom from New Jersey are taking Pam and I out for lunch, to celebrate the engagement. Or maybe to beat me up. I can never tell with those two.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24112

27. Hey, how are you?

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24168

28. Good to see you.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24170

29. All right so now we can sit... and get comfortable.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24173

30. That's not really true. There's a lot of things you can do with an art degree actually.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24229

31. Wow, that's- that's a little rude. What's your deal?

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24231

32. Oh wow. This is my niece Vanessa. She's a trumpeter. And, look at her.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24262

33. That must be really fun for you and Marci huh?

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24264

34. Love that one.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24266

35. Here you go again! What is your deal today?

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24268

36. One.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24271

37. Half.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24273

38. Also good.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24276

39. Pete couldn't make the Mets. She's at Pratt. You played JV baseball. Will you lighten up a little bit?

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24279

40. Pam, don't worry about it.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24282

41. Guys, what is going on?!

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24284

42. Well, I'll be the judge of that. What do you got?

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24319

43. That is good.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24321

44. Truthfully anything would have been better than that prank. Oh, text message from my brother. 'Pam cool. Welcome to the family.'

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24323

45. Yeah, we'd never do that.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24512

46. You wouldn't tell your mom?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24519

47. Those reports affect our bonuses, which is kind of great for me, because you wouldn't know it from looking at her, but Pam's a gold-digger.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24540

48. Aww.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24542

49. Testing, testing. Hello, everybody.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24544

50. Nope.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24567

51. You must be really proud.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24570

52. Oh, sorry. It was just -- it was right here.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24572

53. OK. Or maybe I could finish the coffee that's in here and you could use uh, oh -- Snoopy.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24574

54. How can you even be sure?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24577

55. Make the face. Yeah, I don't see it.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24579

56. Wow. That was Dwight. He seems upset about something.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24582

57. It is... more of a spicy brown, actually.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24584

58. How was your meeting with Michael?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24586

59. Was it your scores?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24588

60. Mm-hmm.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24590

61. Of course.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24592

62. Absolutely. Or you could just be nice to your customers.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24594

63. There's the charm.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24596

64. That is me. Wish me luck.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24598

65. Thanks.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24601

66. I love you, too.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24604

67. I'm not talking to you.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24606

68. What?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24612

69. Did my scores drop a little?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24614

70. Are we even sure that's my file?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24617

71. Well, there's got to be an explanation.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24619

72. Yeah.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24621

73. I think you mean smug

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24623

74. Michael, I'm just trying to --

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24625

75. I need a decent bonus, because I'm actually in the process of buying my parents' house so that they can retire. And if history tells us anything, it's that you can't go wrong buying a house you can't afford. Pam doesn't know about the house, so it's... a fun surprise. Pam, sorry about that. I lost you for a second. So, as it turns out, I may not have done so hot on my customer reviews this year.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24627

76. A little bit. ... Worth it.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24629

77. Microgement.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24631

78. Hello?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24634

79. Wow, that's great, because I need paper.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24636

80. Wow, this is my lucky day.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24638

81. I am Bill Buttlicker.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24641

82. How dare you? My family built this country, by the way.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24643

83. Would you hold on one second? That's my other line.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24646

84. Hello? No, I'm just on the phone with this stupid salesman. He's so dumb. Probably just gonna keep him on the line forever and not buy anything. Yeah, OK.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24648

85. Sorry. That was a family emergency.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24650

86. You know what? That's private.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24652

87. Sorry, you're going to have to speak up a little bit louder. I'm hard of hearing.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24655

88. You're gonna have to talk louder.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24658

89. Son, you have to talk louder.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24660

90. Louder, son!

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24662

91. Now, you listen to me, sir.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24667

92. The three words I would describe you as is aggressive, hostile and definitely difficult.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24669

93. I'm irate right now.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24672

94. Well, I should hope so. Who is this?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24677

95. Well, this is William M. Buttlicker.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24679

96. Michael, I like the sound of your voice. You know what I'm going to do? I'm going to buy one million dollars worth of paper products today.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24681

97. There is one condition, Michael.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24685

98. You have to fire the salesman that treated me so terribly.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24687

99. Dwight. Dwight.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24701

100. Are you serious?

     Season 5 · Episode 6 · Quote 24703