Jim Halpert Quotes from The Office (page 21)

Salesman, prank enthusiast, permanent camera confidant.

6,816 quotes · page 21 of 69

1. Yeah.

   Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17287

2. Bat birth control

   Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17290

3. Which we are.

   Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17294

4. You know what though, I've actually seen ads for nurses that you can hire by the hour, for parties and bachelor events.

   Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17298

5. Great, it's gonna cost a couple a hundred buck and ah... oh actually more with tips.

   Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17300

6. Baquette.

   Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17313

7. Eww.

   Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17315

8. I can imagine.

   Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17317

9. You couldn't have taken off all your clothes in the men's room?

   Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17322

10. Gross.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17329

11. Alright.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17331

12. Oh, I'm sorry, is this a working office, and not a French beach?

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17333

13. Oh, would you look at that.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17368

14. Ooo! An estate sale. Wanna go in?

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17385

15. OK, but what if I told you all the money you spend here, goes to preventing a disease that's already been cured.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17387

16. That's what I thought.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17389

17. Right. Let's do some good.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17391

18. Oh, and I get to carry it.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17424

19. ...talk about it.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17431

20. What are you doing here? Did you come back for us, or...

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17433

21. Well, you're probably dehydrated.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17435

22. Glass of water would be a start.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17437

23. Wow! You are a downer. We were having a pretty nice day.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17439

24. You are?

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17441

25. I'm sorry, are you saying that Meredith was drunk at 9 AM?

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17461

26. Definitely not.

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17473

27. Conference room?

    Season 4 · Episode 1 · Quote 17500

28. Hey.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17533

29. Oh wow, thank you.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17535

30. I'm just gonna grab some chips, you want some?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17537

31. I guess. How dare you.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17539

32. Ummm... yup. Yes, we are.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17553

33. Actually, we've been dating for a couple months.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17562

34. Ohh..

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17564

35. Hey. So now that we are dating, uh, we just wanted to know if we had to sign one of those 'we're dating' things for the company.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17594

36. Oh.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17596

37. Sorry, uh do we need to sign one, or...?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17599

38. What?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17601

39. Oh, OK.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17603

40. Great.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17605

41. Wait a second. Last time I checked, Dunder Mifflin already has a website. And quite frankly, I'm not really sure what's wrong with it.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17641

42. Swore I wouldn't tell anyone this, but in the interest of revealing secrets. Oh my God, this will make your brain explode. Umm, Dwight and Angela dating. Have been for six months.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17662

43. Swear to God.. Aww this is great. I was actually gonna wait and tell you on your birthday, but this is much more fun.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17664

44. Wait. What? You knew? And you didn't say anything?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17666

45. Fair enough. Wow! We should have started dating like a long time ago.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17668

46. Oh no, we're just sitting here.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17671

47. OK.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17675

48. And... that is why we waited so long to tell people.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17676

49. Why do you have the Big picture up again? You used that already, when you burned your foot.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17764

50. Hey, Amy. How ya doing?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17821

51. Nice to meet you.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17823

52. Hey.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17859

53. Alright I just have to ask now that we're public, um, is the magic gone?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17861

54. I knew it. Oh man, just like that huh?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17863

55. Be honest.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17865

56. That's honest. Alright, fair enough. It was really fun while it lasted though, wasn't it?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17867

57. For me, it was.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17869

58. Alright.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17871

59. Why don't we just go by ourselves?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17882

60. What about a gift basket full of cash?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17891

61. Yeah, he's definitely something.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17923

62. That whole lifestyle, his whole vibe, you find that appealing?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 17925

63. I guess he can't get any girl he wants.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18045

64. Into a lake.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18069

65. I know. I love it there.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18076

66. Mmhmm, yeah, last time I was there I had a lot of fun.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18078

67. Sounds great.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18080

68. Yeee... (grunts in frustration)

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18082

69. That was slightly harsh, don't you think?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18095

70. You didn't set up your BlackBerry, Dwight?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18122

71. As opposed to...

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18124

72. What about cars?

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18126

73. They do? So, cars are flightless airplanes.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18128

74. Got it. They're like the penguins of the airplane family.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18130

75. Thanks.

    Season 4 · Episode 2 · Quote 18132

76. There's this cube on the screen, and it bounces around all day, and sometimes it looks like it's heading right into the corner of the screen, and at the last minute it hits a wall and bounces away. And we are all just dying to see it go right into the corner. Pam claims that she saw it one day when she was alone in the conference room. Okay. I believe she thinks she saw it.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18148

77. Wait for it.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18156

78. Hey Meredith, how you feelin'?

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18164

79. Oh, please, it was my pleasure. Well we all came, so...

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18166

80. Haha...

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18168

81. Uh-huh.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18170

82. MmmHmm...

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18172

83. Oh yeah.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18174

84. Alright...

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18176

85. Whoops. Is that really what Ryan wanted you to tell us?

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18181

86. Actually it sounds like you are.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18186

87. Or zipadeedoodaah.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18210

88. I was... mocking.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18214

89. Or a gong.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18218

90. Really? Power gel?

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18237

91. What would you say if I told you we could pull a prank on Dwight and at the same time not be working?

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18241

92. What?

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18243

93. Yeah, I'm aware of that. But he's also being super annoying. And I'm not a perfect person.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18245

94. Not sure. Just became self-aware. So much to figure out. I think I am programmed to be your enemy. I think it is my job to destroy you when it comes to selling paper.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18252

95. Sure we'll go.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18296

96. Oh I'm sorry. What?

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18298

97. Nope.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18302

98. Definitely not. If anything it was a tie.

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18304

99. How's it going?

    Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18307

100. Yeah?

     Season 4 · Episode 3 · Quote 18309