Every line from The Office season 6, episode 4, in script order. First aired October 8, 2009.
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Angela
Are you sure?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31987
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Pam
Yeah.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31988
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Angela
It'll be fun.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31989
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Pam
No.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31990
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Michael
What are you wearing?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31991
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Dwight
What? It's a casual, social outfit.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31992
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Michael
Looks like you're going to a fish fry, Dwight.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31993
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Dwight
No. They're howling at the moon. It's suggestive to women because of the howling during sex.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31994
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Michael
Ok. That's not appropriate. Uncool. Uncool, Dwight. Ok. Ok. Come on. Let's go.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31995
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Kevin
It's a good idea.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31996
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Oscar
It's not a good idea. There's no such thing as a good hairpiece.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31997
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Kevin
Yeah. But that's easy enough for you to say, Oscar. You have that thick, beautiful, Chicano hair. So nice.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31998
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Dwight
I'm just worried about the farm, ya know? Mose hates to geld the horses by himself.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31999
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Michael
Dwight, Dwight. Shut up about the farm. It's not relatable. Nobody owns a farm.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32000
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Isabel
Wait. You're worried about your horses? That's cool. How many horses do you have?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32001
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Dwight
Nine and three-quarters.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32002
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Dwight
I invented a device called 'Burger on the Go'. It allows you to obtain 6 regular size hamburgers, or 12 sliders, from a horse without killing the animal. George Foreman is still considering it. Sharper Image is still considering it. Sky Mall's considering it. Hammacher Schlemer is still considering it. Sears said, 'No'.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32003
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Michael
Toy Story, Finding Nemo, Up. I ball the entire time. I can not watch Pixar.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32004
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Dwight
Michael.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32005
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Michael
Yes.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32006
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Dwight
Drop this one. Abort.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32007
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Michael
Why?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32008
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Dwight
I found twins.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32009
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Michael
Oh, my God. Twins. I'm sorry. You understand. Nice to meet you.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32010
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Dwight
Aren't they magnificent?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32011
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Michael
They're men, Dwight.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32012
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Dwight
I love finding a good set of twins.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32013
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Michael
Something is wrong with you.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32014
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Erin
Go Meredith. Nice moves.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32015
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Andy
You call that a robot? Try being more robotic, ok? Like this.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32016
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Kelly
Lame! What else you got, Andy?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32017
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Andy
How about a little bit of this.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32018
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Erin
Oh yeah. What else you got?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32019
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Kevin
What else you got?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32020
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Andy
Did someone change my name to Baskin Robbin? Because I feel like a banana split. Woo!
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32021
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Erin
What else you got?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32022
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Kevin
It's gonna be fine. It's gonna be fine. Pam's here. Pam?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32023
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Andy
I was dancing and I did a split and I landed on my car keys in my pocket.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32024
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Pam
What?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32025
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Andy
I tore my scrotum. I need you to take me to the hospital.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32026
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Pam
Andy, I am getting married in 8 hours.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32027
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Andy
Everyone else is too drunk. Just don't let me die here.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32028
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Pam
Hey, hey! Where are you? Can you take Andy to the hospital?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32029
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Jim
What?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32030
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Pam
He tore his scrotum dancing.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32031
-
Jim
What?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32032
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Pam
He is in my room icing his balls.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32033
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Jim
What?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32034
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Pam
Please stop saying what. Can you take him?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32035
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Jim
Look, I would so take him in any other circumstance, but I'm pretty certain I'm completely wasted.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32036
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Pam
Your brothers took you out drinking?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32037
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Jim
Uh...
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32038
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Michael
Is that Pam? Hey, have her come out! Have her come out! It would be like Coyote Ugly.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32039
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Pam
That's Michael. You're out with Michael?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32040
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Jim
And Dwight.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32041
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Dwight
Hey-O!
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32042
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Jim
Pam, it just happened.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32043
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Pam
Okay, fine. I'll take him.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32044
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Jim
I love you. Okay, I gotta--I gotta go!
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32045
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Michael
I love you!
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32046
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Pam
Are you pushing me off the phone?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32047
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Jim
No. Let's talk for a long time.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32048
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Pam
Goodbye.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32049
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Michael
Mmm! It's after midnight.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32050
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Michael and Dwight
You're married. He's married!
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32051
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Dwight
Congratulations.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32052
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Jim
That's not how that works.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32053
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Dwight
Oh my goodness.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32054
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Michael
Oh my God. You're not going to be able to talk back.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32055
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Dwight
You'll have Pam to answer to.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32056
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Michael
She'll be sitting home saying, 'Jim... take the baby to the zoo cause I want to sit at home and eat bon-bons.' 'And... and clip my toenails.'
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32057
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Dwight
Jim... hey why don't you braid my hair. I want to watch TV.'
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32058
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Michael
Now you sound like Kermit.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32059
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Andy
Are you sure this is the right way?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32060
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Pam
Nope. I, like you, have never been here before.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32061
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Andy
Well, at least slow down a little bit because every little bump in the road is major pain on... my scrotum.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32062
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Pam
Look, I'm not the one who asked you to do a split when you've never done one before.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32063
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Andy
I was trying to liven things up a little bit. I was kinda doing your job so--
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32064
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Pam
My job? My job is to get married in the morning. That's my job.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32065
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Andy
Well it's also to make sure that we have a great time at your stupid wedding, so--
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32066
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Andy
Ow, ow!
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32067
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Andy
I spent the night with the bride the night before the wedding. Ah yeah. She stepped on my hand on her way to the bathroom.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32068
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Pam
Andy, did I dream that you were crying through the night?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32069
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Andy
No. No that was real.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32070
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Michael
Why don't you take a picture. It'll last longer. God. Can't I get a little privacy?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32071
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Hotel Employee
Good morning. How can I help you?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32072
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Kevin
I left a pair of dress shoes in a bag outside my door last night to be cleaned at polished, but they haven't been returned yet.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32073
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Hotel Employee
You must be Mr. Malone. One moment please.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32074
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Kevin
Thank you.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32075
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Hotel Employee
Sir. It's the man with the shoes.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32076
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Hotel Manager
Mr. Malone. Your shoes are gone.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32077
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Kevin
They were stolen?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32078
-
Hotel Manager
No. Destroyed.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32079
-
Kevin
What?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32080
-
Hotel Manager
The bag was opened by our shoe shine and the smell overcame him. I too smelled them and made the choice that they must be thrown away. Incinerated actually.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32081
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Kevin
But that was my only pair of shoes.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32082
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Hotel Manager
It became a safety issue, sir.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32083
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Kevin
Well... well damn-it.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32084
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Hotel Employee
I can offer you a complimentary breakfast.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32085
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Kevin
Okay.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 32086