Every line from The Office season 6, episode 4, in script order. First aired October 8, 2009.
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Front Desk Clerk
Oh, I'm sorry. Somebody just checked in.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31787
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Pam
Oh... is there another wedding at the hotel this weekend?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31788
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Front Desk Clerk
Oh, no. Just an individual. That man over there.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31789
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Andy
Hey. I got the room the night before you guys. I'll break in the bed.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31790
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Jim
I don't like that.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31791
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Pam
I'm gonna need the name and cell phone number of the housekeeper responsible for changing the sheets, please.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31792
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Michael
Hello. Reservation for Michael Scott.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31793
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Front Desk Clerk
One moment while I check.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31794
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Dwight
The proximity to the falls makes everything smell like a basement.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31795
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Michael
Mmm-hmm.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31796
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Front Desk Clerk
I'm sorry, sir, but I'm not seeing you in here. When did you make your reservation?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31797
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Michael
I don't have a reservation but I want a room in the Halpert-Beesly block of rooms.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31798
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Front Desk Clerk
Oh, ok. Unfortunately, sir, the block only applies to the rate. I'm afraid we're all sold out.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31799
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Dwight
Dwight Schrute. I have a reservation. Confirmation number: Romeo. Tango. G7745.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31800
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Front Desk Clerk
Yes. Schrute.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31801
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Dwight
And I had spoken to Teresa about a room with two safes?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31802
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Front Desk Clerk
Sure. No problem.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31803
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Dwight
Ok.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31804
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Front Desk Clerk
Here's your key, Mr. Schrute.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31805
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Michael
Dwight. Dwight, Dwight. I need to stay in your room.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31806
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Dwight
No way. What if I meet someone?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31807
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Michael
I'm staying in your-- Come on, Dwight.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31808
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Dwight
No. No.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31809
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Michael
I would do the same for you.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31810
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Dwight
You would?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31811
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Michael
Yes.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31812
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Dwight
Really?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31813
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Michael
Yes... just go--
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31814
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Dwight
Wait a second. Oh. No, no, no. This must be some kind of mistake. This reservation seems to be under an M. Scott. This must be yours.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31815
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Michael
Oh. Thank God.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31816
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Dwight
Oh no. Now that I don't have a room, can I stay with you?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31817
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Michael
Um... no. And you know what? I would say yes but you can't. And I'll tell you why.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31818
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Dwight
Please?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31819
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Michael
If I have a woman up there and things are getting amorous, she's going to get turned off if she looks in he bathroom and sees you brushing your teeth with butter and clay.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31820
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Dwight
Mmm-hmm.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31821
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Michael
Ok.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31822
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Dwight
Ok. Ok. A-ha-ha! That was a test. You have failed. For this is my room. You would not share with me.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31823
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Michael
I don't have a room?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31824
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Dwight
No you do not.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31825
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Michael
Ok. 'Oooh. You must pass the dungeon wisdom test.'
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31826
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Dwight
It worked.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31827
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Michael
Jerk.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31828
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Michael
When Mary was denied a room at the inn... Jesus was born. When Michael was denied a room at the inn, we don't know what happens because that story hasn't been told yet.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31829
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Stanley
Mr. and Mrs. Stanley Hudson.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31830
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Michael
Hey. Stanley? Can I stay in your room tonight?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31831
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Stanley
Are you crazy? I brought Cynthia with me.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31832
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Michael
Not in the same bed. In the other bed.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31833
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Stanley
I got one queen size bed.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31834
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Michael
You... are... kidding me.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31835
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Stanley
A queen size bed is five feet wide. I am not five feet wide, Michael.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31836
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Michael
I'm not a physics major, Stanley. I'm just saying be careful. Hey, guys. Hey. Could I stay in your room tonight?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31837
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Erin
Oh. Gross.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31838
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Kelly
Blow my brains out.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31839
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Michael
That's rude.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31840
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Toby
Michael, I have one extra twin bed, if you want.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31841
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Michael
You are going to be slepping by yourself for the rest of your life, so you just get used to it.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31842
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Mr. Halpert
So, which one is Pam's grandma?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31843
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Pam
Oh, Meemaw? She's the one in the teal suit. She's the only 80 year old with no smile wrinkles.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31844
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Jim
Dad, remember, no mention of the baby, right?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31845
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Mr. Halpert
No.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31846
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Michael
Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's very conservative. So, mum's the word.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31847
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Jim
Mom, Dad. This is Michael Scott.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31848
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Mr. Halpert
Oh.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31849
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Michael
How ya doin'?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31850
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Mr. Halpert
Hi.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31851
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Michael
Nice to meet you.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31852
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Mr. Halpert
Nice to meet you.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31853
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Michael
Who's doing a toast? I would like to go third. Sort of bat clean up and--
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31854
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Jim
Michael, I thought we discussed that we would rather you not speak, like, at all. Because it's just going to be blood relatives, I think.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31855
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Michael
[talking quietly, trying not to move his lips]That is seriously going to impeed my ability to hook up with your female relatives.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31856
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Jim
Pretty sure everyone heard that.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31857
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Michael
Didn't move my lips.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31858
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Pam
Hey, Meemaw.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31859
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Meemaw
I wasn't sure about your branch of the family. After I heard about your parent's divorce. But you and Jim are just perfect. God bless you.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31860
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Pam
Oh. Thank you... but nobody's perfect.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31861
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Meemaw
Well... I wouldn't care to live if I thought that.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31862
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Jim
Mr. Beesly. How are ya?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31863
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Mr. Beesly
I'd like you to meet Christy Kelly.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31864
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Jim
Oh. Is this, uh, is this your niece?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31865
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Mr. Beesly
No no. She's my girlfriend. Hey? Can you make room at the head table?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31866
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Dwight
From quarter three to quarter four up 17 percent, while his sales down two percent. It's all in the report.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31867
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Little Girl
Why would they make the bad man a boss if you're so much smarter?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31868
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Dwight
Excellent question. Because while I was busy trying to improve the company and make it a success, Jim... the bad man was busy kissing the boss man's butt.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31869
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Kids
Ewwww!
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31870
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Dwight
That's right. It is ew. It is very ew.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31871
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Pam
Oscar, Kevin, this is my sister, Penny. She's also my maid of honor.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31872
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Oscar
Pleased to meet you.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31873
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Penny
I'm sorry, it's Kevin. I thought it was Gil?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31874
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Kevin
She thought I was your boyfriend.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31875
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Oscar
You thought I was dating this? What the hell is wrong with you?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31876
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Pam
Oscar, it was an honest mistake.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31877
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Oscar
Him? Him?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31878
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Kevin
Oscar, I would be proud to date you.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31879
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Penny
I'm sorry.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31880
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Kevin
I'm not gay. I'm Kevin.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31881
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Penny
Nice to meet you, Kevin.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31882
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Kevin
Yes.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31883
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Oscar
You owe me and apology.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31884
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Penny
I'm so sorry.
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31885
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Kevin
Are you seeing anyone right now?
Season 6 · Episode 4 · Line 31886