Every line from The Office season 3, episode 23, in script order. First aired May 17, 2007.
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Creed
www.creedthoughts.gov.www/creedthoughts. Check it out.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16528
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Ryan
Last year Creed asked me how to set up a blog. Wanting to protect the world from being exposed to Creed's brain I opened up a Word document on his computer and put an address at the top. I've read some of it. Even for the intranet it's... pretty shocking.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16529
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Michael
There they are, the Accounting Department. I shall miss your humility and your promptly printed checks.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16530
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Kevin
Do you think it's gonna to be weird working with Jan in New York?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16531
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Michael
No. Not at all. I haven't talked to Jan since we broke up, and I think if she had something to say she would have called me.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16532
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Oscar
Maybe you should talk to her? Before...
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16533
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Michael
No, no, no. You know what? It's a done deal. I basically have the job already. There's nothing she can do to stop it now. I already sold my condo.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16534
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Oscar
Michael...
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16535
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Kevin
What?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16536
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Angela
Why?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16537
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Oscar
I'm sorry, that just doesn't make sense.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16538
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Michael
Yes, I...
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16539
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Angela
Wha? Who gave you that advice?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16540
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Kevin
Yeah, Michael you should never sell your condo...
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16541
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Michael
I have to buy another place.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16542
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Angela
But you said you were in debt.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16543
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Oscar
You're not sure that you have the job.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16544
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Michael
I sold it on eBay. The buyer was very motivated, as was I. It went for eighty percent of what I paid. Sold in record time.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16545
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Dwight
How would you like to spend the night with the Regional Manager of Dunder-Mifflin, Scranton?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16546
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Angela
No Dwight, I don't care if that is how they consolidated power in ancient Rome.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16547
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Dwight
No, no, not Michael. Me. I'm taking his job.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16548
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Angela
Not now. Goodbye, Kelly Kapoor.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16549
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Dwight
Jim, Jim, Jim. Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16550
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Jim
Oh hey, Dwight.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16551
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Dwight
I am gonna be your new boss. It's my greatest dream come true. Welcome to the Hotel Hell. Check in time is now. Check out time is never.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16552
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Jim
Does my room have cable?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16553
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Dwight
No. And the sheets are made of fire.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16554
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Jim
Can I change rooms?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16555
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Dwight
Sorry, we're all booked up. Hell convention in town.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16556
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Jim
Can I have a late checkout?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16557
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Dwight
I'll have to talk to the manager.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16558
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Jim
You're not the manager even in your own fantasy?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16559
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Dwight
I'm the owner. The co-owner. With Satan!
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16560
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Jim
Okay, just so I understand it, in your wildest fantasy you are in Hell and you are co-running a bed and breakfast with the devil?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16561
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Dwight
Yeah, but I haven't told you my salary yet.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16562
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Jim
Go.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16563
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Dwight
Eighty thousand dollars a year.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16564
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Dwight
Once I'm officially Regional Manager my first order of business will be to demote Jim Halpert. So I will need a new number two. My ideal choice? Jack Bauer. But he is unavailable. Fictional. And overqualified.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16565
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Andy
I will see you at the inter-view.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16566
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Dwight
Yes you will.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16567
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Michael
Who is D. Abramson?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16568
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Pam
He's from that company in Pitts...
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16569
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Jan
Michael.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16570
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Michael
Why... are you here?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16571
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Jan
Uh, how are you?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16572
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Michael
I'm good. How are you, Janet? It's good to see you.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16573
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Jan
I'm great. Uh, can we, can we talk... privately... for a minute?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16574
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Michael
Why privately?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16575
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Jan
I just, I uh... I don't uh... I, I don't, I don't like the way that we left things.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16576
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Michael
Okay, sure, fine. Um, why don't you wait in my office. I have some important business matters to take care of.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16577
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Jan
Okay.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16578
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Michael
Okay.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16579
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Michael
Pam, Defcon ten. Houston, we have a problem.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16580
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Pam
What do you want me to do?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16581
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Michael
Uh, I may need some immediate assistance. If you would slowly and quietly gather the ladies in the conference room. Phyllis, Angela, Karen.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16582
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Pam
What about Meredith?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16583
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Michael
No. She's an alternate.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16584
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Michael
So, how you been?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16585
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Jan
Been good.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16586
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Michael
Good.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16587
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Jan
Good.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16588
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Michael
Yeah.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16589
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Jan
Sorry to drop by unexpectedly. I uh, I tried calling, but I kept getting voice mail.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16590
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Michael
Weird. Yeah, I didn't get both of your messages.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16591
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Pam
So, um, Michael needs us in the conference room.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16592
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Karen
Cause of Jan again?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16593
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Karen
Hey, uh, before I leave tonight, would you mind making a half a dozen copies of Jim's and my sales reports for our interviews tomorrow?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16594
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Pam
Uh, sure.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16595
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Karen
Thanks.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16596
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Pam
I really hope you get the job.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16597
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Karen
Thanks.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16598
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Jan
After you ended... everything with us, I went on a vacation.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16599
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Michael
Hmm.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16600
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Jan
To kinda clear my mind.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16601
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Michael
Sound good. Sounds fun.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16602
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Jan
It was. Yeah, it was good. I think I'll just get right to the point, you know? Um, I, I feel good about myself for the first time in a really long time.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16603
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Michael
Hmm..
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16604
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Jan
I've made some big changes in my life and... I miss you. I want us to get back together.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16605
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Michael
Would you excuse me for a second?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16606
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Jan
Ohh...
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16607
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Michael
Defcon twenty. She wants to get back together.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16608
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Phyllis
What are you gonna do?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16609
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Michael
I don't know, that's why you're here, help me. Please...
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16610
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Karen
Do you want to get back together with her?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16611
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Michael
No, no. What do I do?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16612
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Pam
Just don't get back together with her.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16613
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Michael
What if she makes me?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16614
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Angela
How can she make you get back together with her?
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16615
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Michael
She made me do a lot of things I didn't wanna do.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16616
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Pam
This was a terrible relationship. You were not happy when you were with her.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16617
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Michael
I wasn't.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16618
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Pam
You're so much happier now. Just go in there and be strong.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16619
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Michael
You're right. You're absolutely right. I'm gonna go in there and tell her that we can't be together.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16620
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Pam
Right.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16621
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Michael
Wow.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16622
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Karen
Do it.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16623
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Michael
I'm in a very good place right now. Thank you.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16624
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Michael
Okay. Jan, we need to talk.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16625
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Michael
Jan is in a different place right now, and it is a sign of maturity to give people second chances. So I am going to hear her out.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16626
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Pam
Oh my God.
Season 3 · Episode 23 · Line 16627