Kelly Kapoor Quotes from The Office (page 2)

Customer service rep and pop culture authority.

956 quotes · page 2 of 10

  1. Yeah. I mean, I've been noticing them all day, I was thinking that maybe ...

    Season 2 · Episode 18 · Line 7971

  2. So, how's your day been?

    Season 2 · Episode 18 · Line 8189

  3. Yeah, it doesn't help that Stanley's daughter's such a slut.

    Season 2 · Episode 18 · Line 8191

  4. Second opinion on what?

    Season 2 · Episode 19 · Line 8268

  5. Oh, no! I was watching Grey's Anatomy, and there was a lifeguard on it, and

    Season 2 · Episode 19 · Line 8270

  6. I never really thought about death until Princess Diana died. That was the saddest funeral ever. That and my sister's.

    Season 2 · Episode 19 · Line 8272

  7. Don't be scared! You're good! You're good!

    Season 2 · Episode 19 · Line 8410

  8. And the guys are saying, chug, chug, chug, but I'm so small and all I'd eaten that day was one of those Auntie Anne pretzels from the food court so I said 'Is it okay if I sip it?' and they said no, but Ryan seemed cool either way.

    Season 2 · Episode 20 · Line 8485

  9. Six.

    Season 2 · Episode 20 · Line 8487

  10. So the first time we went out to dinner, it was like, whatever, fine, but I was so nervous. So this time I wanted to be special, so I bought a new dress! One of those kinds that is kinda low cut at top to show something, but not everything. I mean not everything, Jim. I promise, I'm not that kind of...

    Season 2 · Episode 20 · Line 8583

  11. We're having the best conversation.

    Season 2 · Episode 20 · Line 8585

  12. So, I was looking so hot...

    Season 2 · Episode 20 · Line 8587

  13. Oh, sure, I can definitely help you with that. Okay? Please hold.

    Season 2 · Episode 20 · Line 8716

  14. But then we wouldn't have any meetings.

    Season 2 · Episode 20 · Line 8745

  15. Okay. Bye, Toby.

    Season 2 · Episode 20 · Line 8747

  16. Oh, my God. Oh, my God, oh, my God. Hello? Yes, I am so, so sorry. Yeah, actually, I don't have that information just yet. Uh-huh. Listen, do you mind if I put you on a brief hold? Okay.

    Season 2 · Episode 20 · Line 8749

  17. I didn't file a complaint. I was just talking.

    Season 2 · Episode 21 · Line 8883

  18. To my friend, I thought. I want that withdrawn.

    Season 2 · Episode 21 · Line 8885

  19. Kobe Bryant has a foundation, and he is so hot. And he gave his wife the biggest diamond ring. I know he didn't do it. Maybe he did it.

    Season 2 · Episode 22 · Line 9129

  20. That is so cool that you're gay. I totally underestimated you.

    Season 3 · Episode 1 · Line 9559

  21. Oh my God! Are you so excited for tonight? I am so excited. You guys are going to click, I can feel it. So what are you wearing?

    Season 3 · Episode 2 · Line 9703

  22. You look so pretty.

    Season 3 · Episode 2 · Line 9705

  23. Well, remember, no matter how much you may want to, do not sleep with him on the first date. It gives him all the power.

    Season 3 · Episode 2 · Line 9708

  24. My neighbor Alan. They're going on a date tonight.

    Season 3 · Episode 2 · Line 9710

  25. Alan's cartoon is so funny, right?

    Season 3 · Episode 2 · Line 9769

  26. And they're, like, so smart. I don't even know what they mean half the time.

    Season 3 · Episode 2 · Line 9771

  27. So, Alan, Pam is obsessed with your cartoons. She reads them every day.

    Season 3 · Episode 2 · Line 9900

  28. You love ketchup! He loves ketchup.

    Season 3 · Episode 2 · Line 9903

  29. I love it!

    Season 3 · Episode 3 · Line 10039

  30. You haven't even tried it on yet, try it on.

    Season 3 · Episode 3 · Line 10041

  31. Fashion show! Fashion show! Fashion show at lunch!

    Season 3 · Episode 3 · Line 10043

  32. Fashion show! Fashion show! Fashion show at lunch! Fashion show! Fashion show! Fashion show at lunch!

    Season 3 · Episode 3 · Line 10045

  33. It's

    Season 3 · Episode 3 · Line 10102

  34. What?

    Season 3 · Episode 3 · Line 10105

  35. No, you have to keep it today, just see how you feel.

    Season 3 · Episode 3 · Line 10107

  36. Isn't that like your third soda today?

    Season 3 · Episode 3 · Line 10112

  37. Oh, Michael, that's such terrible news! You must feel so sad.

    Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10315

  38. Ugh, no that thing is

    Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10470

  39. [crying]

    Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10482

  40. I mean, how many times to I have to confirm with Ryan for him to know that we have a date tonight?

    Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10484

  41. You told us we had to.

    Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10506

  42. Because they acted all tough and everything...

    Season 3 · Episode 5 · Line 10668

  43. But what they were rapping about was cupcakes and the Chronicles of Narnia. God. Who invented cupcakes, right? I want to...

    Season 3 · Episode 5 · Line 10670

  44. I can't believe that Ryan is not back yet. Where could they be?

    Season 3 · Episode 5 · Line 10725

  45. Oh my God, I'm so worried.

    Season 3 · Episode 5 · Line 10727

  46. I don't know. Dwight's so weird.

    Season 3 · Episode 5 · Line 10729

  47. No, he's a freak.

    Season 3 · Episode 5 · Line 10731

  48. Here you go.

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10913

  49. It's not a dress. It's a kurta.

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10915

  50. You look so handsome.

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10918

  51. I know.

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10920

  52. I...

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10922

  53. I don't get why you won't go. Did I do something wrong? I mean, I thought we were really close friends.

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10927

  54. Well, go with Dwight. He's single, too. Right?

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10931

  55. Um... Diwali is awesome... and there's food... and there's going to be dancing... and... Oh! I got the raddest outfit. It has, um...

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10943

  56. Sparkles...

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10945

  57. Oh, um... I don't know. It's really old, I think.

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10947

  58. Like hundreds, I think. Maybe more than that.

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 10949

  59. Ruka, Nipa, Tiffany. Stop acting like such little losers and just be cool. Come on, Ryan. Come on. Leave him alone. I hate you guys.

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 11016

  60. Don't even listen to them. They're so...

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 11018

  61. I don't even want to hear it. Okay. I didn't come this Diwali to get yelled at!

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 11023

  62. Uh... excuse me. I want to get a...

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 11025

  63. Um, well, basically, it's like a really big party, and everybody gets super-dressed up, and there's a bunch of different gods, and each of the gods has a special power, like the Care Bears, you know?

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 11127

  64. Like, an Indian Halloween?

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 11129

  65. Um, customer service.

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 11143

  66. What? I'm not Muslim!

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 11150

  67. She's so wonderful.

    Season 3 · Episode 6 · Line 11159

  68. If I get to stay and Ryan is laid off, I will kill myself. Like Romeo and Juliet, the Claire Danes one.

    Season 3 · Episode 7 · Line 11256

  69. Ahhhhh! I'm so happy we don't have to break up now, Ryan! This is the best day of my whole l ife!

    Season 3 · Episode 7 · Line 11385

  70. Jim!

    Season 3 · Episode 8 · Line 11645

  71. Oh! Oh my god! I have so much to tell you!

    Season 3 · Episode 8 · Line 11647

  72. Yes! Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes? They had a baby and they named it Suri. And then Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie? They had a baby, too, and they named it Shiloh. And both babies are amazing!

    Season 3 · Episode 8 · Line 11649

  73. I just told you.

    Season 3 · Episode 8 · Line 11651

  74. Looks like salmon.

    Season 3 · Episode 8 · Line 11657

  75. I eat beef.

    Season 3 · Episode 8 · Line 11659

  76. Hey, a margarita-karaoke Christmas party, that sounds like fun.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12418

  77. What d'ya think?

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12558

  78. See, I told you. You want one Meredith?

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12560

  79. Well that blows.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12568

  80. Whatever we deny or embrace. For worse or for better. We belong, we belong, we belong together... Ryan...

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12642

  81. Hello, Ryan.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12739

  82. Oh, thank you. Do you always get presents for your ex-girlfriends?

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12741

  83. Well, I didn't get you anything, because you have treated me inconsiderately, and I'm not gonna stand for that anymore.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12743

  84. Wait, Ryan, you're not mean. You're adorable. I'm so sorry. I got you a present, too. But then when I got to work, I didn't see anything on my desk from you, so I threw it away. And then Asuncion took the trash out, that's why I think it's in the dumpster. I'm so sorry. I'm the worst.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12745

  85. No, you paid money for that CD.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12750

  86. I don't understand.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12752

  87. You don't have to scream at me.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12754

  88. Sometimes.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12756

  89. Don't dump me while I'm in the dumpster. Just go back inside if you're so cold. I'll just stay in the dumpster.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12758

  90. Who's eating all these apples?

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12760

  91. And what are these? Are... Why are there egg yolks in here? Aren't you supposed to eat the yolks?

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12762

  92. Do you think I should diet?

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12764

  93. No, I'm scared.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12766

  94. Uh huh. Hold me.

    Season 3 · Episode 10 · Line 12768

  95. I have the munchies. I'm gonna get some of those chocolate wafers.

    Season 3 · Episode 11 · Line 13033

  96. Eighty-six. Eighty-seven. Eighty-eight. Eighty-nine.

    Season 3 · Episode 11 · Line 13069

  97. Dunder-Mifflin customer service, this is Kelly.

    Season 3 · Episode 12 · Line 13269

  98. Oh my god, Jim. How are you ? I wanted to tell you ... .

    Season 3 · Episode 12 · Line 13271

  99. Well I don't even think the stripper was that hot. Do you guys think she was hot?

    Season 3 · Episode 14 · Line 13804

  100. Do what? I just asked you a question.

    Season 3 · Episode 14 · Line 13806