"Customer Survey" Quotes

Every line from The Office season 5, episode 6, in script order. First aired November 6, 2008.

417 quotes · page 1 of 5

  1. Michael

    Hey, sport.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24505

  2. Dwight

    I heard someone got engaged, you dog, huh?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24506

  3. Michael

    Ow! God!

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24507

  4. Dwight

    Oh, nothing can hurt you now. You're a man in love!

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24508

  5. Darryl

    I was there. That dude is not engaged. I'm not a big believer in therapy, but I'll go into my own pocket to cover his co-pay.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24509

  6. Andy

    Big idea: double wedding. Me, Angela, you, Holly.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24510

  7. Michael

    No, we would never do that. And if we did, it would be with Jim and Pam.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24511

  8. Jim

    Yeah, we'd never do that.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24512

  9. Michael

    Yeah, so there you go.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24513

  10. Kelly

    Michael, I got my bridesmaid dress.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24514

  11. Michael

    Oh, wow, so quickly.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24515

  12. Kelly

    Yeah, and you said I could get it in any color I wanted, so I picked white.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24516

  13. Kevin

    Michael, did you tell your mom yet?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24517

  14. Michael

    Nope. Nope. Not yet.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24518

  15. Jim

    You wouldn't tell your mom?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24519

  16. Kevin

    You love your mom.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24520

  17. Kelly

    Call your mom, Michael.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24521

  18. Michael

    I'll call her later.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24522

  19. Group

    Call her! Call her!

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24523

  20. Michael

    I don't want to do that. All right. She is going to freak out!

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24524

  21. Andy

    Speakerphone!

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24525

  22. Michael

    That's -- thanks.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24526

  23. Mother

    Hello?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24527

  24. Michael

    Mom, I'm getting married.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24528

  25. Mother

    No, you're not.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24529

  26. Michael

    Why do you always do that? Whenever I'm getting married, you don't believe me.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24530

  27. Mother

    Well, are you getting married?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24531

  28. Michael

    No.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24532

  29. Mother

    Are you--

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24533

  30. Michael

    I'm not, I'm not getting married. So... Psych.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24534

  31. Kelly

    So I returned my bridesmaid dress, and it was on sale, so I'm out $100.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24535

  32. Michael

    And I'm out a fiancee. Are those the customer surveys?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24536

  33. Kelly

    Yeah, uh, this is all of them: Jim, Dwight, Phyllis, Stanley, Andy and -- oh. Oh, it's the receipt to my bridesmaid dress. What's that doing there?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24537

  34. Michael

    I'll take care of that for you. Thanks.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24538

  35. Michael

    Kelly Kapoor is our dusky, exotic customer service rep. And once a year, she will contact our clients and find out how happy they are with our salespeople. Sort of a Kapoor's List. 'Schindler's List' parody. ... That's not appropriate, no.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24539

  36. Jim

    Those reports affect our bonuses, which is kind of great for me, because you wouldn't know it from looking at her, but Pam's a gold-digger.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24540

  37. Pam

    Hey, New York ain't free. Get back to work.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24541

  38. Jim

    Aww.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24542

  39. Pam

    It's the world's tiniest Bluetooth. I found it in a Japanese gadget store in the village. I got one for Jim, too. Jim, say something.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24543

  40. Jim

    Testing, testing. Hello, everybody.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24544

  41. Pam

    We wanted to stay on the phone all day, but the company has a policy against eight-hour personal calls. So we're not telling anyone.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24545

  42. Alex

    Uh, Pam. What do you want on your coffee?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24546

  43. Jim and Pam

    Sprinkle of cinnamon.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24547

  44. Pam

    I should go.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24548

  45. Michael

    Alrighty, Dwighty, let's see how you did.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24549

  46. Dwight

    Bring it on.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24550

  47. Michael

    No.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24551

  48. Dwight

    Sorry.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24552

  49. Michael

    Wow.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24553

  50. Dwight

    What does it say?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24554

  51. Michael

    Dwight, your feedback is horrible.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24555

  52. Dwight

    That's impossible.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24556

  53. Michael

    A number of your clients found your personal style abrasive and distasteful.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24557

  54. Dwight

    I sell more paper than anyone.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24558

  55. Michael

    No, no, no, no, no.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24559

  56. Dwight

    Wait, is this a joke? I'm getting that queasy feeling that sometimes accompanies jokes.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24560

  57. Michael

    Do I look like I am joking?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24561

  58. Dwight

    No, but that's sometimes part of it.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24562

  59. Michael

    If I were joking, you would be laughing. Do you look like you are laughing?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24563

  60. Dwight

    Impossible to say. I can't see myself.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24564

  61. Michael

    You're not.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24565

  62. Andy

    Yo, Tommy Tuna, did you get your scores yet?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24566

  63. Jim

    Nope.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24567

  64. Andy

    I got mine. They were really good.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24568

  65. Pam

    I miss him.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24569

  66. Jim

    You must be really proud.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24570

  67. Andy

    Yeah, pretty psyched. Whoa! That's my mug.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24571

  68. Jim

    Oh, sorry. It was just -- it was right here.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24572

  69. Andy

    Right, well, it's mine, so if you could pour it out and get another one.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24573

  70. Jim

    OK. Or maybe I could finish the coffee that's in here and you could use uh, oh -- Snoopy.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24574

  71. Pam

    Don't give him Snoopy. That's mine.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24575

  72. Andy

    It is a great mug. But it's not my mug. That is my mug. So give it back.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24576

  73. Jim

    How can you even be sure?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24577

  74. Andy

    It has my face on it.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24578

  75. Jim

    Make the face. Yeah, I don't see it.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24579

  76. Andy

    Dude, that is my face!

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24580

  77. Pam

    What was that?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24581

  78. Jim

    Wow. That was Dwight. He seems upset about something.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24582

  79. Pam

    Describe him exactly. What color mustard is his shirt? Yellow or Dijon?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24583

  80. Jim

    It is... more of a spicy brown, actually.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24584

  81. Dwight

    What are you mumbling about?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24585

  82. Jim

    How was your meeting with Michael?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24586

  83. Dwight

    None of your business.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24587

  84. Jim

    Was it your scores?

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24588

  85. Dwight

    Those can't be my scores, Jim. For your information --

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24589

  86. Jim

    Mm-hmm.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24590

  87. Dwight

    I'm being sabotaged.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24591

  88. Jim

    Of course.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24592

  89. Dwight

    And I'm going to find that person and punish them.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24593

  90. Jim

    Absolutely. Or you could just be nice to your customers.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24594

  91. Dwight

    You're an idiot.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24595

  92. Jim

    There's the charm.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24596

  93. Michael

    Jimbo, let's do this thang.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24597

  94. Jim

    That is me. Wish me luck.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24598

  95. Dwight

    No way.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24599

  96. Pam

    Good luck.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24600

  97. Jim

    Thanks.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24601

  98. Dwight

    I didn't say anything

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24602

  99. Pam

    I love you.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24603

  100. Jim

    I love you, too.

    Season 5 · Episode 6 · Line 24604