Gabe Lewis Quotes from The Office (page 4)

Sabre liaison to the Scranton branch.

437 quotes · page 4 of 5

1. My entire childhood, I was the one left out, and I said to myself: Gabe, if you just achieve some success, you'll be part of them. You'll be part of the happy ones. But instead, people just used my success as a new way to shut me out.

   Season 8 · Episode 1 · Quote 45985

2. I cannot believe that Andy is throwing a party like this just to impress the CEO. Classic Gabe move. Hey Andy, how about you don't steal my business strategies, and I won't dress like my life is just one long brunch?

   Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46678

3. I can't believe I didn't think of toasting Robert. Get in the game, Gabriel! Why are you talking to Stanley's mistress?

   Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46774

4. I would also like to toast Robert California. Mr. California,...

   Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46783

5. To Robert California, from the moment you entered our building and our hearts, you...

   Season 8 · Episode 4 · Quote 46788

6. And I overheard, and thought, hey, that'd be fun, don't mind if I do.

   Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 46979

7. Sweetheart.

   Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47026

8. Ok where does Gabe factor in?

   Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47028

9. Yes. Lars and Decocco's

   Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47030

10. I will make this sexier than you could ever imagine.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47032

11. Oh that would be scary!

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47034

12. Ok let me go get it.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47036

13. The cinema of the unsettling is a growing film movement. The most well known film in the genre is an hour long shot of a squirrel with diarrhea.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47082

14. Yeah it seems like there isn't a narrative. Maybe the filmmaker realized that even narrative is comforting.

    Season 8 · Episode 5 · Quote 47086

15. Hey.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47230

16. Monday's suck.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47232

17. Hey. I need you to get the paperwork rolling on a new workplace relationship.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47244

18. Yes. For Gabe.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47246

19. Whom I'm seeing is Val from down in the warehouse.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47248

20. I'm not technically seeing her, but uh I've seen her, with the eyes and uh there was attraction. In at least one direction. So..[holds up fist]

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47250

21. Ok, but once this starts, it's going to be moving fast. It's going to be hot and heavy and I don't want a bunch of bureaucratic red tape wrapped around my jock. You know?

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47252

22. Yeah we had a whole conversation about Mondays'

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47254

23. Toby I'm going to tell you her last name tomorrow because she's going to be screaming it tonight.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47256

24. Hey! Watch it.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47258

25. It's for protecting my ass. When you suckers lift more than you can handle. Sup, I'm Gabe. Corporate. Continue. Don't be nervous.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47291

26. Look at this, this is enormous.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47295

27. I get the sense that Val enjoys a good putdown. Considering that's the only thing I know about her. I will be milking that hard.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47296

28. It's like a hula hoop. Right. Mele Kalikimaka is the wise way.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47297

29. The Michelin man called, he wants his cummerbund back.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47299

30. Hey Darryl, I was thinking, uh, maybe while we read through this, uh, you could grab us all some coffee. My treat. It's a hundred dollar bill. Should cover it I think. Don't bring me any of that caramel soy latte crap, ok? I want a decaf frappuccino. Val'

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47324

31. Uh.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47327

32. Decaf frap-

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47329

33. Hey. You're welcome.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47403

34. So, tonight I was thinking, I'm gonna go to the cemetery. I'm gonna drink a little wine and I thought maybe you'd like to come with me.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47405

35. Yes, I am.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47407

36. I could quit. Problem solved.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47409

37. Well Darryl, considering that I basically own the place, I'm just chillin' at mi casa. This is me, in repose..I suppose.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47498

38. You know, there's this expression: Bro's before Ho's. And what that's short for is brothers before whores. Uh, I don't buy that. I would throw any brother under the bus for any whore. Woman.

    Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47499

39. Well he's probably a drug dealer. That's the best way to land a hot girlfriend. You just uh get her hooked on blow.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47578

40. It's one of the most common fetishes.

    Season 8 · Episode 7 · Quote 47589

41. The Sabre Code of Conduct outlines the governing principles key to establishing and maintaining trust with our employees, clients-

    Season 8 · Episode 8 · Quote 47830

42. Oh, is it okay with you? Because if it's not, you work for me, so... Comply with all applicable laws, regulations, policies and contracts governing our business. Be honest, fair-

    Season 8 · Episode 8 · Quote 47833

43. And trustworthy in all your business activities and relationships. Treat one another-

    Season 8 · Episode 8 · Quote 47835

44. Fun fact. In France, they call Limitless 'The Man with Many Capabilities.'

    Season 8 · Episode 8 · Quote 47917

45. No, no, I'm-

    Season 8 · Episode 8 · Quote 47980

46. Apparently, I bear a passing resemblance to Abraham Lincoln. Makes it kind of hard for me to go to places like museums, historical monuments, elementary schools... I don't see it. Chelsea's Mom: Chelsea, give Mr. Lincoln your hat so I can take a picture.

    Season 8 · Episode 8 · Quote 47981

47. Okay, Quick.

    Season 8 · Episode 8 · Quote 47982

48. Oh, uh, no. No, no, no, no. I'm, uh, I'm actually with a tour group myself, so- Hello! I'm Abraham Lincoln! Some people call me the great emancipator, but, uh, you might know me from the penny.

    Season 8 · Episode 8 · Quote 47984

49. I just don't understand. It's 1865, victory is ours, I've saved the very soul of our nation, and yet... happiness eludes me. Oh, perhaps a trip to the theater will enliven my spirits.

    Season 8 · Episode 8 · Quote 47995

50. Abe and Mary are seated watching the show. Oh Mary this is wonderful' Ok Mary stop your scolding. I'll be quiet. I need her like I need a hole in the head! BANG! Ooh

    Season 8 · Episode 8 · Quote 48066

51. I didn't know Darryl joined.

    Season 8 · Episode 9 · Quote 48337

52. Nice pelvic bowl. Deep.

    Season 8 · Episode 9 · Quote 48339

53. They say that if you can strengthen your core, it improves your sexual performance. So, you will find me on the Ab-Blaster. And then you will find me blasting...uh, a very nice young woman.

    Season 8 · Episode 9 · Quote 48390

54. Steve Martin. uh, I'm fine.

    Season 8 · Episode 9 · Quote 48393

55. Dwight? What are you doing here?

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48790

56. Course I know.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48792

57. Corporate says to me, 'Gabe, we need you in Scranton.' Scranton says, 'Gabe, go back down to Florida. You're needed there.' So, Tuesdays and Thursdays, I'm up there. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, I'm down here. I can think of no better way to confront my deathly fear of flying.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48794

58. You can reduce your prices by ten percent or we're going to be finding a new source for our morning bagels. All right.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48834

59. Yeah. But not just bagels. All unwanted problems. Question: What's the most important appliance in your house?

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48836

60. Too slow. It's the toilet. And I am the toilet of this office. I flush away annoying problems so others can keep their hands clean. And, just like a toilet, I am essential.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48838

61. CEO to COO. What a difference a letter makes.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48843

62. You're really going to like Bill. He, uh, he has me toilet a lot of people for him. Hallway phone, Gabe Lewis speaking.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48845

63. Your wish is my command.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48847

64. Hey man, uh, look. Unfortunately, Bill had to go fight a fire, so your appointment got-

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48881

65. Well, it's nine miles away. I'm going to be meeting with you on his behalf.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48883

66. I can see you in the jungle now.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48886

67. I know.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48905

68. What?

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48907

69. You're doing great. You know, so good.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48909

70. Dwight, that was a fantastic presentation. Put your hand on my hand. Flush! Ow!

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48911

71. Ow! He went home.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48913

72. Uh, it's a condo and it's long-term business housing.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48915

73. Ow! Ow! Stephanie, help!

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48917

74. I don't know. All I know is the building.

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48934

75. Yay Robert!

    Season 8 · Episode 11 · Quote 48958

76. I'm feeling eighty-two, eighty-two and a half.

    Season 8 · Episode 12 · Quote 49084

77. Well, we'll say its eight-two and it'll be our secret.

    Season 8 · Episode 12 · Quote 49086

78. Too kind doesn't begin to cover it.

    Season 8 · Episode 12 · Quote 49151

79. And Gabe-y makes three.

    Season 8 · Episode 12 · Quote 49153

80. Yup. We could watch some right now if you want. I got a Korean film on my iPod if you want to just- if you have the cables.

    Season 8 · Episode 12 · Quote 49218

81. And that goes double for me. I'll stay even later than you'd like.

    Season 8 · Episode 12 · Quote 49296

82. So leave.

    Season 8 · Episode 12 · Quote 49304

83. Beautiful sentiment.

    Season 8 · Episode 12 · Quote 49343

84. I live in this room.

    Season 8 · Episode 12 · Quote 49345

85. Everyone, our very own Angela-

    Season 8 · Episode 13 · Quote 49391

86. Oh, I am so in.

    Season 8 · Episode 13 · Quote 49393

87. I love maternity wards. It's the perfect blend of love and horror. Things can go so wrong or so right.

    Season 8 · Episode 13 · Quote 49394

88. You've reached Gabe Lewis, I'm currently indisposed. Leave me a message. Ciao.

    Season 8 · Episode 13 · Quote 49521

89. You had something important to tell me?

    Season 8 · Episode 13 · Quote 49674

90. Wait, wait, you think she invented 'Talla-nasty?' no, no, no, no'

    Season 8 · Episode 16 · Quote 50298

91. What happens if you're the hunchback?

    Season 8 · Episode 16 · Quote 50319

92. Well, then you have to call me by my name. Gabriel Susan Lewis.

    Season 8 · Episode 16 · Quote 50458

93. What's in it for GSL?

    Season 8 · Episode 16 · Quote 50460

94. Got it.

    Season 8 · Episode 16 · Quote 50462

95. They don't make these cords in boot cut anymore!

    Season 8 · Episode 16 · Quote 50508

96. I'm not just saying this, that was the best thing I've ever seen.

    Season 8 · Episode 18 · Quote 50948

97. Guys, that's the elevator. What if it's him?

    Season 8 · Episode 20 · Quote 51392

98. Ah! Ha ha ha!

    Season 8 · Episode 20 · Quote 51396

99. I don't really see what the problem is. Erin doesn't even like sex, remember? You said it feels like getting tackled by a skeleton.

    Season 8 · Episode 21 · Quote 51854

100. I've read- and I don't know anything about this personally- but they say prostate stimulation can help.

     Season 8 · Episode 21 · Quote 51874