David Wallace Quotes from The Office (page 3)

CFO of Dunder Mifflin and inventor of Suck It.

493 quotes · page 3 of 5

  1. Okay?

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29666

  2. I've been wondering that myself lately. We're just gonna get started, we're gonna figure this out. Rest assured. Jim, can you come in with us please?

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29668

  3. Hmm.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29670

  4. I find that extraordinarily surprising.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29672

  5. We'll bring them both in.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29674

  6. Fellas, why don't we take a five-minute break and then we will come back, start fresh, sort this out.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29715

  7. Yeah, yeah.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29747

  8. I can't believe I'm about to say this, but the cheapest option... is to make Michael an offer.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29749

  9. Jim, you're-- you're pretty close with him. You think they'd be up for hearing an offer?

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29754

  10. Yeah.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29756

  11. Michael, in order to expedite these negotiations, we are prepared to make you a very generous offer.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29801

  12. $12,000.00

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29805

  13. Here's the situation. Your company is four weeks old. I know this business. I know what suppliers are charging. I know you can't be making very much money. I don't know how your prices are so low, but I know it can't keep up that way. I'm sure you're scared. Probably in debt. This is the best offer you're gonna get.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29809

  14. Okay, now I don't know that I can get this. I do have to go to the board for approval. How's about $60,000. Hmm? $60,0000. Michael?

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29811

  15. Okay, yes. Please take the room. Be right outside. Take your time.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29817

  16. So you've thought it over, yes, and you accept our offer. We can finally put this whole thing behind us? Hmm?

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29844

  17. Yeah.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29847

  18. I am not firing Charles. He is very valuable.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29862

  19. No.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29865

  20. Uh, you already have a new receptionist--

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29867

  21. Pam's not a salesperson.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29870

  22. Okay. Please continue.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29873

  23. Ryan cost Dunder Mifflin hundreds of thousands of dollars, Michael. Ryan is--

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29875

  24. Do you realize what you're asking for here? You're talking about salary plus health benefits--

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29877

  25. Insurance, taxes, social security for three people. This is a heck of a lot more than 60 grand. You're talking about a multi-million dollar buy-out.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29879

  26. Your company cannot be worth that much.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29881

  27. Michael--

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29883

  28. Okay. Deal. Okay?

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29885

  29. Yeah.

    Season 5 · Episode 23 · Line 29887

  30. Nicely done. We're still going to crush you though!

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30654

  31. Welcome to the 43rd Annual Company Picnic, everybody. Thanks for being here. Now, a couple of employees have volunteered to entertain us with a song.

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30666

  32. Okay, introducing Scranton's Michael Scott performing with Nashua's Holly Flax! I have not seen this.

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30668

  33. Uh, okay everyone, we're at a picnic today...

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30694

  34. I'm sorry, this certainly wasn't the time or the place to announce this sort of thing, but there have been talks about closing the Buffalo branch.

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30698

  35. We're- we're closing the Buffalo branch.

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30700

  36. How could you possibly think that the right way to announce a branch closing was in a comedy sketch at the company picnic?

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30702

  37. What about the fact that they're here today? What about that? That didn't throw up any alarms? No, Michael needed a little bit for his comedy sketch, and he thought, 'oh, this would be really funny.'

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30704

  38. Damn it, Michael, I told you that in confidence. Now I have to go over and deal with these employees and their families. A little boy just walked up to me and said, 'is my daddy gonna have a job by Christmas?'

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30706

  39. Yeah.

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30736

  40. Dwight, come on now, it's time to put in the subs.

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30772

  41. Dwight.

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30779

  42. Okay.

    Season 5 · Episode 26 · Line 30781

  43. So Michael, do you think you can give me a run down on the Buffalo clients by Monday?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31130

  44. Okay, I will look at it Monday.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31132

  45. Okay, Jim you wanna hit the conference room?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31134

  46. No, ah it's okay Michael. We got it.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31140

  47. Yeah.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31142

  48. Okay.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31144

  49. Michael, we would like to continue the rest of this meeting in private, please, if you don't mind.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31184

  50. Cheese platter?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31215

  51. Alright, well I should go. Thanks for this. You've given me a lot to think about. Please promise me you won't do anything until we speak.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31217

  52. Thank you Jim.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31219

  53. Erin, is Michael around?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31220

  54. Ah, yeah, could we talk in your office for a second?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31223

  55. Are you sure you're okay with these new responsibilites?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31257

  56. I'm just trying to figure out the best way to utilize everyone's talents.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31259

  57. What about Jim? Do you think Jim is someone who is ready to move into a management position?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31261

  58. Please do.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31263

  59. I thought you liked Jim?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31265

  60. 'Constant office distractions, spends way too much time at reception, antagonizes other salesman, not at all what he thinks he is.'

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31267

  61. Is there anybody else you think could run the day to day of the branch?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31269

  62. Jim had an interesting idea to help you with this extra work load and it involved you being promoted to oversee all northeast sales and then Jim would be promoted to your position.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31271

  63. Mmhmm.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31273

  64. Ummm... okay, here's the thing though. The plan doesn't work unless we have someone to replace you. I was hoping... plus we have to worry about Jim, he has another job offer. We may have to replace him.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31275

  65. Jim can you walk me out to my car for a second.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31277

  66. This is David.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31307

  67. Yep.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31309

  68. So, what, you're changing your mind about Jim?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31311

  69. Michael, it seems like you're cutting in and out... This is not what you said earlier.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31313

  70. Well, it doesn't change what you showed me in Jim's file.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31315

  71. Michael, I really don't know what's going on down there, but... oh, dammit, I am getting pulled over for talking on my cell, dammit.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31317

  72. Hey Michael, you got Jim there with you?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31345

  73. Actually, can you call Jim in? I want him on, please.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31347

  74. Hey guys, so I spoke to Alan, we had kind of an unconventional idea, which I think is pretty cool. But it only works if everyone's on board.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31350

  75. We were thinking of having two branch managers in Scranton. Both of you guys working as co-managers. Jim would handle the day to day and Michael you would focus on clients and big picture stuff.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31352

  76. Co-manager and Co-manager. See, there are a lot of moving pieces and this is the only way I can sell it upstairs.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31355

  77. Alright, hey Michael can you pick up for one second. Okay look, I'm not going to force you into anything. If you're willing to lose Jim, fine, you just say so and we'll find another solution, okay. Is that what you want to do?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Line 31357

  78. Hey guys, um, I'm calling, because, unfortunately, we will not be able to give out cost of living raises this year, and I know people expect it. However, there just is only a small amount of money for each branch, so we're leaving it up to the managers to decide how to distribute it.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Line 31493

  79. It's probably a little of both.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Line 31496

  80. Excuse me?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Line 31498

  81. Wait, I'm sorry. Michael, are you-- are you texting me?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Line 31500

  82. Look, I need you both to take care of this. This is not going to be a problem, is it?

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Line 31502

  83. Very good.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Line 31505

  84. Hey, sorry to be getting back to you guys so late. Things are still a bit unclear, we didn't officially decide anything yet.

    Season 6 · Episode 9 · Line 33806

  85. But if I can be candid with you here Jim, it's not good. We fully expect to be out of money by the end of the year. Insolvent. So, well... You know what? I'm sorry, I have to run. But we will talk soon, OK?

    Season 6 · Episode 9 · Line 33808

  86. You know what? I can't really get my head around anything like that right now, but that's great. Keep after it, but I gotta run.

    Season 6 · Episode 9 · Line 33810

  87. Thanks Jim.

    Season 6 · Episode 9 · Line 33812

  88. Michael.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 33947

  89. So glad you could make it.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 33949

  90. How was the ride?

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 33951

  91. I'm glad. I want to introduce you to everyone. First we'll start with Alan Brand. Alan? CEO. Michael Scott, Branch manager, Scranton.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 33953

  92. Seated, we have the former congressman, Chris O'Keefe.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 33956

  93. It was fun when we weren't on the brink of bankruptcy.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 33974

  94. Believe me everyone is working very hard, working weekends, struggling, trying to right the ship.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 34009

  95. What are we supposed to tell them now? Ok? You've dug us quite a hole.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 34051

  96. There is no plan.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 34053

  97. Yes.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 34059

  98. Yes.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 34061

  99. Yes.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 34063

  100. No. No. No. No. No. No. Don't call anybody, Michael.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Line 34066