Every quote from The Office season 8, episode 6, in script order. First aired November 3, 2011.
-
Andy
Dwight's our co-worker and he worked really hard on this doomsday device so I'
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47285
-
Dwight
It's not a doomsday device, gosh. We can do this you guys.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47286
-
Warehouse Crew
First. Second.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47287
-
Darryl
It's not a race.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47288
-
Warehouse Crew
Thirrrr'.third.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47289
-
Darryl
Who knows what the belt is for?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47290
-
Gabe
It's for protecting my ass. When you suckers lift more than you can handle. Sup, I'm Gabe. Corporate. Continue. Don't be nervous.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47291
-
Darryl
Apparently we have a visitor. Gabe, everyone.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47292
-
Warehouse Crew
Hi, gabe.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47293
-
Darryl
All right so the support belt. Now this one is mine. Doesn't get much use nowadays.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47294
-
Gabe
Look at this, this is enormous.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47295
-
Gabe
I get the sense that Val enjoys a good putdown. Considering that's the only thing I know about her. I will be milking that hard.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47296
-
Gabe
It's like a hula hoop. Right. Mele Kalikimaka is the wise way.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47297
-
Darryl
You done?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47298
-
Gabe
The Michelin man called, he wants his cummerbund back.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47299
-
Phyllis
Remember we have to give Rigo Escrow their refund by five.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47300
-
Kevin
I'm on it.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47301
-
Angela
Kevin, maybe I should handle that. We really need you to focus on your project.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47302
-
Kevin
Good thinking.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47303
-
Kevin
Apparently a big client for this company, needs to know the story of how paper gets made.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47304
-
Angela
Oscar, use a calculator.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47305
-
Oscar
When the stakes are this high, there is only one computer that I trust. And it's powered by thai food and spanish reds.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47306
-
Andy
Alright everybody, you are doing great!
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47307
-
Dwight
Well, I wouldn't say that. Three mistakes already is pretty terrible, but I do see improvement. Meredith kept someone on hold for thirty minutes and now look she's hard at work.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47308
-
Jim
Dwight, question.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47309
-
Dwight
No questions.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47310
-
Jim
If this doomsday device goes off...
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47311
-
Dwight
Accountability booster.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47312
-
Jim
If this bad idea goes off and we all lose our jobs. Are you going to feel good about that?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47313
-
Dwight
I haven't even considered it. That's how sure I am that this accountability booster is going to work.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47314
-
Stanley
Try mose1234.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47315
-
Ryan
Dwight would never be that obvious. Try something like'z64$8. Not that exactly Jim, something like that.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47316
-
Jim
Ok.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47317
-
Dwight
How about Scrantonstrangler666.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47318
-
Jim
Nope.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47319
-
Dwight
No. Oh shoot. Ha ha ha'You guys are never gonna shut down the machine, ok? But I appreciate your energy and your team work. If you applied this to your regular work, You won't even notice that the device is there, watching you ready to strike.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47320
-
Kelly
Wha'what's Dwight's mothers name.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47321
-
Jim
Hmm'Heda. No.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47322
-
Darryl
Once you read the packet, sign the back.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47323
-
Gabe
Hey Darryl, I was thinking, uh, maybe while we read through this, uh, you could grab us all some coffee. My treat. It's a hundred dollar bill. Should cover it I think. Don't bring me any of that caramel soy latte crap, ok? I want a decaf frappuccino. Val'
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47324
-
Darryl
Actually, Val, why don't you come with? I'll need the extra hands to carry them back.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47325
-
Val
Yeah, sure.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47326
-
Gabe
Uh.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47327
-
Darryl
Mmhmm. Caramel soy latte.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47328
-
Gabe
Decaf frap-
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47329
-
Darryl
Got it.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47330
-
Angela
You sent the late notice to Ryan Heart & Wolf. Right?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47331
-
Oscar
Mhm. Six-forty, six-twenty.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47332
-
Angela
Six-seventy, six-twenty.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47333
-
Oscar
Nuh uh.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47334
-
Angela
yes!
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47335
-
Oscar
Five eighty-eight plus fifteen percent- Oh no.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47336
-
Kevin
What does this mean? What does it mean!
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47337
-
Oscar
Andy.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47338
-
Angela
Ohhhh!
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47339
-
Andy
Gahhh. That's five strikes.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47340
-
Stanley
Well'I was saving this for my retirement, which I guess is today.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47341
-
Andy
Dwight we got five strikes.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47342
-
Dwight
Really?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47343
-
Andy
Did the email go out or'
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47344
-
Dwight
It goes out automatically at five P.M.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47345
-
Andy
Well, th- There's gotta be a way to stop it.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47346
-
Dwight
Well, I would have to enter my password in order to cancel it.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47347
-
Andy
Ok! Dwight you may now enter your password.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47348
-
Dwight
No.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47349
-
Andy
What?!
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47350
-
Dwight
You don't deserve to have this branch. Five mistakes in less than a day.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47351
-
Phyllis
We did our best.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47352
-
Dwight
No you didn't, Phyllis. You complained the whole time. You yelled at me. You tried to break into the machine. What?!
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47353
-
Erin
You're a real crumb bum, you know that?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47354
-
Dwight
Hey, you can't just change the rules because you don't like the outcome. What about you, Kevin? What about you and your fake task? Can you tell me now where paper comes from?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47355
-
Kevin
Uh, the man tree puts its penis-
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47356
-
Dwight
Ha. Ok, alright. Andy back me up here, please.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47357
-
Andy
Nn no.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47358
-
Dwight
What?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47359
-
Andy
No!
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47360
-
Oscar
Dwight be human for once. Shut down the machine.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47361
-
Kelly
Shut it down! Shut it down! Shut down the machine!!! Shut it down! Shut it down!
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47362
-
Dwight
Good luck finding a new job idiots. I'll make sure to write you a glowing reference. Glowingly negative.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47363
-
Erin
Dwight's car is gone.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47364
-
Pam
I bet he went home.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47365
-
Andy
Some of us should go there and talk some sense into him. Get him to stop that email.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47366
-
Andy
Pam, you should come with me. Dwight really likes you and your breasts are enormous that could help us.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47367
-
Kevin
Yeah.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47368
-
Andy
Kevin has that lovability.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47369
-
Kevin
Guys come on. I'm right here.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47370
-
Andy
Jim, I want you to go find Robert just be where he is in case that email goes out at five. You can try to delete it or something.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47371
-
Jim
Ok, where is he?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47372
-
Erin
Uh, he's at some club where you either eat squash or play squash.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47373
-
Jim
I'll try both.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47374
-
Dwight
Oh. Come to reason with me?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47375
-
Andy
Gotcha something. And, uh, I just really want to talk to you-
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47376
-
Dwight
Get lost.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47377
-
Andy
Well now hold on it, it-
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47378
-
Pam
What are you doing?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47379
-
Dwight
What does it look like I'm doing? Digging a grave for a horse.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47380
-
Pam
Uhm.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47381
-
Erin
Do you need a hand?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47382
-
Pam
Yeah, do you need a hand?
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47383
-
Dwight
If you hit another horse, you've dug to far.
Season 8 · Episode 6 · Quote 47384