"Lotto" Quotes (page 3)

Name: Lotto
Released: 2011-10-06

Every line from The Office season 8, episode 3, in script order. First aired October 6, 2011.

317 quotes · page 3 of 4

Gideon

FYI, Wednesday through Friday I have a pretty full teaching schedule.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46510
Andy

Eh, cool. We'll figure that out.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46511
Nate

Also, FYI, ah, I don't techinically have a hearing problem, but sometimes when there's a lot of noises occurring uh at the same time, I'll hear 'em as one big jumble. Uh, again it's not that I can't hear, uh because that's false. I can. Um, I just can't distinguish between everything I'm hearing.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46512
Andy

Got it. Dually noted. You! Coolest tank top I have ever seen. Where did you get that?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46513
Bruce

Made it.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46514
Andy

So cool! What a cross-section we have here. That's what I love about interviewing. I get to meet all these people I wouldn't ordinarily meet or know or even talk to.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46515
Dwight

Message in a Bottle, The Postman...

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46516
Jim

Kevin Costner.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46517
Dwight

Kevin Costner.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46518
Jim

Yeah.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46519
Kevin

So I found this grease. And then I remembered that you thought it was a great idea.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46520
Erin

You did say it was a great idea. I heard you say it!

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46521
Jim

So, it's not the dumbest idea.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46522
Dwight

It's not the greatest one either...

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46523
Jim

But, the fact remains we gotta move these boxes.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46524
Dwight

And it's clear we're not going to carry them.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46525
Jim

So sadly, it's the best idea on the table.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46526
Dwight

Exactly.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46527
Kevin

I think we're ready to give thi- Jim?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46528
Jim

Is he OK?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46529
Dwight

Yep. He'll be fine.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46530
Andy

Surprise! Your new crew.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46531
Darryl

Would you just fire me, man?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46532
Andy

Why? Because you didn't win the lottery? How am I supposed to make you happy?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46533
Darryl

You wanna make me happy? Huh?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46534
Andy

Yeah.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46535
Darryl

Give me your job.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46536
Andy

Haha, what?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46537
Darryl

I'll do it better than you. I earned it. I deserve it. I got passed over, God knows why, reasons I cannot and will not understand. The job was mine Andy, everyone said it was mine. Make me manager or fire me.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46538
Andy

I'm not gonna give you my job! It's my job! I earned it! And here's the thing, you weren't even next in line. I asked about you, I saw your file. You have a history of being short with people and you hired Glenn, your buddy! To replace you in the warehouse. He was under qualified. They saw that.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46539
Nate

Also, Darryl, FYI, I already told this to Andy, but uh, you should probably know I technically don't have a hearing problem, it's just when there's a lot of noises...

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46540
Andy

Nate! Please....thank you. You have no business education, you were gonna take classes under D'Angelo, what happened to that?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46541
Darryl

He died.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46542
Andy

He didn't die, his brain died. And my brain is still very much alive and I'd be happy to give you business classes. How come you haven't asked me about it?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46543
Nate

What wa-, what was the last...I'm havin' a-

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46544
Andy

None, no part of this has anything to do with you.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46545
Darryl

I didn't have time because of my daughter.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46546
Andy

Oh, but you had time for a softball clinic, and a Mediterranean cooking class.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46547
Darryl

Hey I'm not gonna tell you this stuff if you gonna throw it back in my face.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46548
Andy

Hey. Here's the thing. Jo saw something in you. She loved you! She gave you a shot and then you stopped pushing. She noticed.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46549
Darryl

OK.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46550
Andy

OK what?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46551
Darryl

OK, don't fire me.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46552
Andy

Ah, OK.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46553
Darryl

My future's not gonna be determined by seven little white lotto balls. It's gonna be determined by two big black balls. I control my destiny. I do.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46554
Darryl

I put some guys on tonight. Best of your bunch and my bunch. Tell you now though, it's gonna be mostly my bunch.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46555
Andy

Yeah. That makes sense. OK. Good, alright.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46556
Kevin

Here...

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46557
Andy

What is goin' on?!

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46558
Kevin

Oh hey guys.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46559
Darryl

Why is the forklift in the wall?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46560
Andy

Why is the truck empty?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46561
Dwight

Uh, it's not totally empty.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46562
Darryl

Is that grease on my floor?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46563
Dwight

OK, I can see why you're angry, you're coming into this cold. But believe me a lot of thought went into this.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46564
Darryl

And did your brains tell you to ruin these boxes with grease?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46565
Kevin

OK Darryl, listen and then you will understand. The boxes were ruined during our first trial testing so now it's cool cause we found another use for them.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46566
Jim

OK, alright, that's...look. All we were trying to do is we thought we could come up with a more efficient way to do things.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46567
Darryl

And?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46568
Erin

And we did.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46569
Dwight

I don't know.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46570
Erin

Jim? Tell them what it's called.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46571
Jim

That's alright.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46572
Kevin

No Jim, tell 'em what a name is.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46573
Jim

Doesn't matter what the name is. Senor Loadenstein, that's stupid.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46574
Kevin

Senor Loadenstein. Tell 'em why it's called that, Jim.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46575
Jim

That's OK, we're good.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46576
Erin

Jim...

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46577
Andy

No, Jim. Tell us why it's called Senor Loadenstein.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46578
Jim

Porque es muy rapido.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46579
Dwight

OK. You know what? It's been a real busy day, what do you say we put all this away.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46580
Darryl

Let me see it.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46581
Dwight

It's uh, it's in beta testing.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46582
Darryl

Let me see it!

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46583
Dwight

Get the thing, go! Lube it up, Kevin! Start mopping.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46584
Dwight, Erin, Jim & Kevin

Uno! Dos! Tres!

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46585
Phyllis

Yeah, I lost my client.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46586
Creed

I already won the lottery. I was born in the US of A, baby. And as backup I have a Swiss passport.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46587
Toby

I would spend a lot of time launching my true crime podcast, The Flenderson Files. Dum bum buh. Flenderson files.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46588
Pam

We came to an agreement. We're going to live in a stunning pre-war brownstone at the top of a mountain.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46589
Jim

Right. It's city and country combined.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46590
Pam

Just a subway stop away are the best museums in the world.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46591
Jim

And I can fish right from the window of Pam's pottery studio. And we can chat any time we want.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46592
Pam

Just like now.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46593
Jim

Just like now....too bad the schools are terrible.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46594
Pam

Oh..

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46595
Jim

But what are you gonna do about that?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46596
Pam

What are you gonna do?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46597
Toby

If I won the lottery, I don't know. I don't think I'd make any changes to my life. Quit my job, move, meet someone....

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46598
Ryan

I'd give 35% to AIDS related charities. 25%. If they can't cure AIDS with 25%, the extra ten's not gonna make a difference. At some point, you're just throwing good money after bad.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46599
Phyllis

The first thing I'd buy is new boobs. For my mom. She has the worst boobs. It- It's embarrassing.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46600
Jim

Ok, ok. We are so close. All we have to do is figure out that corner and we're basically there.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46601
Dwight

I know. Kevin, we've been friends for a long time, right?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46602
Kevin

Egons.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46603
Dwight

So if I was to ask you to sacrifice your body and lay down on a greasy corner and act as a human bumper shield-

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46604
Jim

Ok, Dwight! Come on. Here, I think I have an idea.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46605
Dwight

I wouldn't be asking you lightly, now would I?

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46606
Kevin

No.

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46607
Dwight

Right. Now do you wanna wear a trash bag, er...

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46608
Jim

Dammit Dwight!

Season 8 · Episode 3 · Line 46609