Every line from The Office season 7, episode 9, in script order. First aired November 18, 2010.
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Ryan
Yes. You alone do, actually.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40910
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Michael
I--yes. We're not selling. I will not sell.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40911
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Kevin
Awesome!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40912
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Man
Do you mind if we share this bale?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40913
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Angela
Sure.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40914
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Man
There's no charge to sit on the hay, is there?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40915
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Angela
Probably.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40916
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Man
I mean, wouldn't you think the ten dollars to build your own broom would include the hay and not just the instructions?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40917
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Angela
Mm-Hmm.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40918
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Man
I mean, I'm starting to think this guy is just trying to make money off the holiday.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40919
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Angela
Yeah, instead of Hay Place, it should be pay place. Don't laugh at me.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40920
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Man
No, no, no, I wasn't--I was just laughing at your joke.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40921
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Angela
Oh.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40922
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Man
Pay Place.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40923
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Angela
Mm. Yeah, so we can celebrate Thanksgiving-Me-Your-Money Day.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40924
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Man
That's humorous.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40925
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Angela
Thank You.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40926
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Kevin
You guys know how to get out?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40927
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Pam
Hi, Michael.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40928
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Michael
Can't talk, saving the planet.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40929
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Pam
Oh, we don't recycle.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40930
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Michael
We Don't? Well, why have I been separating the trash into whites and colors?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40931
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Pam
I'm sure no one asked you to do that.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40932
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Michael
Eight Years.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40933
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Pam
Listen, I know you really like Ryan--
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40934
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Michael
No, I won't even consider it.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40935
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Pam
Michael, I... I hate to say this, but... you know this special bond that you've always felt with Ryan, where, like, you're best friends or you're his mentor or something?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40936
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Michael
Right, Yes, yeah. Best friend/mentor.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40937
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Pam
Michael, I think that feeling only goes one way. And I think that Ryan knows that, and he's taking advantage of you.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40938
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Michael
I think you are wrong.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40939
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Pam
And there are a lot of other people in this office who have money at stake. Other people you care about.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40940
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Michael
You may be right. I may be crazy.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40941
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Pam
Don't.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40942
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Michael
I'm just saying that I think I agree with your point.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40943
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Pam
Yeah, but in a jokey way where you're gonna start singing.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40944
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Michael
I thought it might make me feel better.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40945
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Pam
Okay. Go Ahead.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40946
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Michael
But it just may be a lunatic... No.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40947
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Jim
Oh, nice, wasting time, here we go.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40948
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Meredith
Hey, back off. It's Solitare.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40949
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Creed
Hey, kid--hear you're looking for work.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40950
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Jim
Talk to me.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40951
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Creed
How far can you reach those Lovely long arms of yours? Eh, put 'em down. How long can you hold that pretty little breath of yours? Good.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40952
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Gabe
Hey, Jim? Are you distracting these people?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40953
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Creed
We're working.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40954
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Gabe
Can you at least
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40955
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Jim
[listening to and editing Jo's book on tape]
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40956
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Jo Bennett
The moment Darla put the cupcake in her mouth, her daddy pulled her aside and said, 'You're Too Fat. No one's gonna like you if you're too fat.' The next time I saw David Geffen was at the buffalo club. 'I love you, you Gay Bastard,' I said. 'You Gay Bastard,' I s--. 'Gay Ba--' 'Gay B--''
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40957
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Ryan
Michael, how's it going, bro?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40958
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Michael
Good, good, bro.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40959
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Ryan
Hey, thanks so much for having my back out there.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40960
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Michael
Always have your back. So, any ideas on how we can get over this nine-day hump here?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40961
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Ryan
I have nothing but ideas. The thing is, they all require money.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40962
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Michael
Nine days, though. That's, like...
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40963
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Ryan
Look, I know I've tapped you so hard.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40964
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Michael
Yes, you have tapped this. Hard.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40965
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Ryan
Oh, you are funny, Michael. You--people, people don't give you enough credit.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40966
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Michael
Maybe I could take a second mortgage on my condo.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40967
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Ryan
Well, a lot of people are doing that. And there don't seem to be any consequences. And they say the rates have never been lower.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40968
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Michael
So you would think that's a good idea for me to do?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40969
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Ryan
Think about this. You and me on a private plane flown by our private pilot--
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40970
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Michael
Mm-Hmm.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40971
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Ryan
Eating our private meal cooked by our private chef.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40972
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Michael
Yeah, well, we never even have dinner now, so...
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40973
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Ryan
We totally should.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40974
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Michael
Tonight?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40975
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Ryan
I gotta work on this.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40976
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Michael
Oh right. What am I saying? Rain Check.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40977
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Ryan
Yeah.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40978
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Dwight
And now, by show of applause, We will crown this year's hay king. All in favor of Purebred. Put your hands together for... Mixed Bread. And let's hear it for... Purebred. Mm. It appears we have a three-way tie. I have no choice but to pick the Hay King myself. I pick... Me! I am your Hay King! All Hail your Hay King!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40979
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Dwight
Did I truck 300 bales of hay to a parking lot to rectify some childhood disappointment? Yes.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40980
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Man
So, if I were to call Dunder Mifflin and ask for Miss Angela Martin, would I get through to you?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40981
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Angela
You would. And if I were to call your house and ask for your wife, would I get through to you?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40982
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Man
My wife passed away a few years ago.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40983
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Angela
How tragic. Very sorry to hear that.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40984
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Man
Thank You.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40985
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Kevin
Help! Hello?! Oh! Help![runs around the maze]
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40986
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Darryl
Consider it a WUPHF in person.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40987
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Andy
Your doing the wrong thing. You're gonna lose Michael's investment. You're gonna lose ours.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40988
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Darryl
You got this crazy opportunity to get our money back. Tell Mike To Sell.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40989
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Andy
If you tell Michael to sell, he'll sell.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40990
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Ryan
I'm betting on myself.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40991
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Stanley
It's a bad bet.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40992
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Michael
Hello.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40993
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Ryan
Hey. It's an ambush here. Nobody here believes in this company. Will you tell them they're wrong?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40994
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Darryl
It's not that we don't believe in the company, We don't believe in you.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40995
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Andy
All those in favor of selling, say aye.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40996
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Michael
I. Do not agree to sell, which is to say nay.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40997
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Darryl
What is wrong with you? What happened to you in High School?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40998
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Stanley
Michael, are you that blind?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40999
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Michael
I'm not blind! I know exactly who he is. He is selfish and lazy and image-obsessed, and he is a bad friend. And he's also clever. And he shoots incredibly high. And he may just make it. But you know what? Even if he doesn't, I would rather go broke betting on my people, than get rich all by myself, on some island like a castaway. And there is no middle ground.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 41000
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Andy
You're gonna lose all of our money.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 41001
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Michael
Only if he fails. And you know what? Ryan, I believe in you. Just like I believe in all of you. You have nine days to save everybody's money.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 41002
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Ryan
Oh... Uh, That's a lot of pressure. I--I'm gonna need some more time.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 41003
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Michael
You can't have it.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 41004
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Ryan
Okay. I won't let you down.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 41005
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Dwight
Angela? Angela!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 41006
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Michael
The world sends people your way... Ryan came to me through a temp agency. Andy was transferred here. No idea where Creed came from. The point is you just have to play with the cards that you're dealt. Jim, that guy is an ace. Dwight is my King up my sleeve. Phyllis is my old maid. Oscar is my queen. That's easy. Gimme a hard one. That's what Oscar said. Toby is the instruction card you throw away. Pam's a solid seven. And yeah, you know what? Ryan is probably, like, a two. But sometimes twos can be wild. So watch out. And I am obviously the joker. So... That's Uh...
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 41007
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Robotic Voice
WUPHF, from Ryan Howard. Decided to sell company. Thanks, bro. Hell of a ride.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 41008
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Michael
Thank God.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 41009