Every line from The Office season 7, episode 9, in script order. First aired November 18, 2010.
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Phyllis
You have all of our attention just by screaming anything.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40810
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Michael
That's good to know.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40811
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Pam
What do you want to say, Michael?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40812
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Michael
Wuphf! All right, I've warmed them up for you. You have the floor, Ryan.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40813
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Ryan
How's everybody doing?!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40814
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Michael
Whoo!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40815
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Ryan
Good! Now, a lot of you have already staked out your corner of the WUPHF empire. Raise your hand if I'm describing you.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40816
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Stanley
Yes, I have a dream. And It's not some M.L.K. Dream for Equality. I want to own a decommissioned Lighthouse. And I want to live at the top. And nobody knows I live there. And there's a button that I can press, and it'll launch that lighthouse into space.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40817
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Ryan
For my current investors, things are going great.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40818
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Michael
We already have a buyer.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40819
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Pam
Really?! Who?!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40820
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Ryan
Washington University. I don't even want to think about selling until our numbers get into the billions.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40821
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Michael
At least.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40822
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Ryan
So I've decided to open up a second round of investment to friends and family.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40823
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Phyllis
Oh, God. Hold on to your wallets, ladies.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40824
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Oscar
Did you ever think of WUPHF as an emergency notification system, like, for college campuses with shooters or gas leaks?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40825
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Ryan
No, no--Oscar, it's not--it's not a digital rape whistle. WUPHF is about fun.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40826
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Michael
That's right!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40827
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Ryan
Fun, communication, connection.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40828
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Oscar
What's your money situation?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40829
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Ryan
Well, it's tight, as with any start-up.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40830
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Oscar
Sure, how long can you sustain this without a cash infusion?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40831
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Ryan
We have nine solid days. I love these questions. Keep 'em coming.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40832
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Andy
I'm sorry, nine days until what?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40833
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Oscar
Bankruptcy?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40834
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Michael
Wait, Ryan, so this could be over by the weekend?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40835
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Oscar
How long do you think a week is?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40836
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Michael
No, not this weekend; next weekend. We were gonna go on the investors ski trip. I bought poles.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40837
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Jim
Well, since I have no incentive to sell, I've cleaned my car, organized my desk, and taken a multivitamin. So... what now?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40838
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Jim
Pam. Okay, now I've tried everything.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40839
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Pam
Did you prank Dwight?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40840
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Jim
No.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40841
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Pam
Well, you like that.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40842
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Jim
Yeah, it's not as fun if I'm not blowing off work.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40843
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Pam
I love you, but I'm kinda busy. So I need you to figure this one out on your own.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40844
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Jim
[blows a raspberry, Erin looks shocked, Kevin chuckles]
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40845
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Pam
Oscar said WUPHF only has enough money for nine days.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40846
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Ryan
Check this out.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40847
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Erin
All that color.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40848
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Michael
Look at that. Triple your investment by January.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40849
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Andy
Anyone can just throw numbes up on a chart. What are you doing to make it happen?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40850
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Ryan
Well, earlier today, I was emailing someone by the name of John Legend.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40851
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Michael
There you go.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40852
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Andy
You have his email?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40853
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Ryan
A lot of these guys are just Mac.com, @ their website, whatever. We get that guy WUPHFing, it's all over.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40854
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Stanley
I want my money back.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40855
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Michael
Do not talk like that, Stanley.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40856
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Pam
Ryan, just tell us your plan.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40857
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Ryan
Okay, all right. I know what you wanna see. I'll be right back.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40858
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Dwight
Hey kids, was that fun?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40859
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Kids
Yeah!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40860
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Dwight
All Right!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40861
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Kid
I wanna go on it again.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40862
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Dwight
Oh, I bet you do. You know what? When I was a little kid, they couldn't get me off the hayride! But it's gonna cost you three more bucks.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40863
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Dwight
Wow! This brings back memories. Hay stacking, hay throwing... and at the end of it all, one lucky boy would be crowned Hay King. I always wanted to be Hay King. The world shines on Mose.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40864
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Angela
[waiting for Dwight at their meeting place, slams the door shut]
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40865
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Angela
Where have you been?! I've been waiting.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40866
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Dwight
Uh, can we move this to the end of the day?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40867
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Angela
No, I--I think you should make time for it.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40868
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Little Girl
I found the needle in the haystack!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40869
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Dwight
Hey, congratulations! Do you know what your prize is?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40870
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Little Girl
I don't know!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40871
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Dwight
Nothing. Life Lesson? Some tasks are not worth doing.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40872
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Angela
Dwight?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40873
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Ryan
WUPHF T-Shirts. Who wants one? Just imagine that you're at spring break, Daytona Beach.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40874
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Michael
Here we go.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40875
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Ryan
Everyone's like, 'Hey Dude, whats up with all the hotties in the WUPHF shirts?' Or, Uh, 'Hey, what's up with that helicopter? It's Ry from WUPHF!'
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40876
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Michael
It's Ryan the WUPHF guy!'
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40877
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Ryan
Yo, Ry from WUPHF!'
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40878
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Michael
He's up there.'
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40879
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Ryan
What's he dropping?! Wow, what's falling on us, man?!' WUPHF condoms! 50,000 condoms out of the sky!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40880
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Michael
Look at that! He threw 'em on the ground!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40881
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Darryl
Look, this is a marketing campgain. You got nine days. Let's say you do get the money. What are you going to do with it?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40882
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Ryan
The first lesson of Silicon Valley, actually, is that you only think about the user, the experience. You actually don't think about the money. Ever.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40883
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Andy
That sounds weird.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40884
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Michael
No, it's not weird, Andy, and you know what else? We have an offer from Washington University. So monetize that.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40885
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Kelly
Are you guys meeting about WUPHF? You know that that was my idea, right?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40886
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Kelly
I said to Ryan, 'I try to call you, and you don't have your phone. I try to I.M. You, and you're not online. I wish there was a way that I could do everything all at once, and I could just be like this little dog going, 'Ruff! Ruff! Ruff! Ruff! Ruff!''
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40887
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Ryan
Baby, Baby, Baby--
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40888
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Kelly
I think I'm gonna stay here.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40889
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Ryan
No, no, no, no, no.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40890
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Kelly
I do, I do. This isn't right.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40891
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Ryan
I help you with your things and you help me with my things.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40892
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Kelly
But I--it's not right.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40893
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Ryan
I got this, it's okay. Don't worry about this.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40894
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Darryl
Is it any particular branch of Washington University?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40895
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Ryan
The Washington University Public Health Fund.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40896
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Darryl
W.U.P.H.F.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40897
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Pam
Oh, God!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40898
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Darryl
They only want it for the initials.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40899
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Ryan
The domain name. Yeah, they do.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40900
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Pam
I move we sell!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40901
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Michael
What?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40902
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Darryl
Yeah, sell!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40903
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Andy
Yeah, sell.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40904
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Pam
Sell.
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40905
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Stanley
Get us out of this!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40906
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Ryan
Have some faith in this idea!
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40907
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Darryl
If everybody wants to sell, we sell, right?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40908
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Michael
I won't sell. And you know what? Ryan and I have the majority of shares. Isn't that right?
Season 7 · Episode 9 · Line 40909