Every line from The Office season 7, episode 5, in script order. First aired October 21, 2010.
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Meredith
Hel-lo!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39672
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Michael
Oh, no, no. No. Don't-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39673
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Dwight
People can't keep their true natures hidden for long, and this guy is smoldering like a tire fire.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39674
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Michael
Testify.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39675
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Jim
Okay, he's not that good-looking. I don't understand why everybody's obsessed with this-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39676
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Michael
Yeah, he is that good-looking.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39677
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Dwight
He's very, very handsome.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39678
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Michael
Okay.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39679
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Meredith
That's a great set of shoulder's you got there. What is that...Genetics? Creatine? Sorry. Yeah?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39680
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Michael
Pull it together, all right? Stop lookin' at him.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39681
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Meredith
I'm sorry. You're here to sell me some paper.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39682
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Danny
Well, actually, uh... no, Miss Van Helsing, that's not why I'm here. I'm here to meet you, see if we'd be a, you know, good fit.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39683
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Meredith
What do you mean?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39684
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Michael
Oh...my god! He's making her sell to him.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39685
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Andy
Okay. Honest feedback time. Oscar?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39686
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Oscar
It's pandering. And it makes me think you think I'm stupid.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39687
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Andy
But do you think it could be famous? Like in a car commercial or something?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39688
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Pam
Not really. It's kinda weird that a grown man is singing from the point of view of a little girl.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39689
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Andy
I feel like I can see someone ice skating to it. You know, like in the Olympics.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39690
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Ryan
I-I don't think they usually...skate to such...bad songs.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39691
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Andy
Rude. And not helpful.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39692
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Creed
Well, I really, really, really liked it.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39693
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Andy
Well, that...really bums me out.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39694
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Creed
You're welcome.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39695
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Danny
We should think of this as a first date. And I think it's going very well, how 'bout you?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39696
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Meredith
Real well. Uh...feels more like a third date to me.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39697
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Danny
Ha ha, okay, there you go!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39698
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Michael
Stay-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39699
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Meredith
Shut up and let me do this! You know, what is with this desk keeping us so far apart?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39700
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Danny
I've never been a desk man. Always traveling on the road. Come on...why not, huh?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39701
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Dwight
Oh...
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39702
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Danny
Well, we'll get this...[Meredith unbuttons]
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39703
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Michael
Oh!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39704
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Dwight
Oh, man!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39705
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Meredith
So, what's your drink? You a vodka man? Me too.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39706
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Jim
We gotta get someone else in there right now.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39707
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Jim
You're an exec at Pennsylvania Solartech and-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39708
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Oscar
That sounds fake.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39709
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Jim
What do you mean?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39710
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Dwight
I told you! You're an exec at Stark Industries, a corporation you inherited from your father-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39711
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Jim
Will you stop? Stop it, stop it. Here's the story-they need Meredith somewhere else asap, okay?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39712
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Oscar
Okay.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39713
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Jim
So you're taking over. You just gotta get her out of there as soon as you can.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39714
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Oscar
All right. I can do that. Then what?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39715
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Dwight
Then make him pitch to you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39716
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Jim
Yes.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39717
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Dwight
We gotta see what he's got.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39718
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Jim
Exactly. You can do this.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39719
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Dwight
Okay, and remember-you're not gay.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39720
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Jim
Stop it! It's gonna be great.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39721
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Oscar
Okay.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39722
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Jim
And listen if anything else happens, just...roll with it.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39723
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Oscar
Meredith, I-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39724
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Meredith
Oh, Manuel! This is Manuel, my cleaning man. He doesn't speak any English.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39725
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Danny
Hola. Que tal?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39726
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Oscar
Como estas, senor?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39727
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Meredith
Uh, Manuel, cleano el window.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39728
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Jim
Who else we got?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39729
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Dwight
Okay. You're a young hotshot from Stark Industries. You've just bought this company. Meredith is fired. It's a whole new regime. He's gotta pitch to you now.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39730
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Ryan
Okay. Stark Industries isn't real. I run Google. Larry and Sergey brought me in-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39731
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Jim
Great. Sounds awesome. Just have him pitch to you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39732
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Michael
Don't let us down.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39733
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Ryan
Will do. Won't do.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39734
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Danny
Yeah, sure.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39735
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Meredith
You smell like a Scorpio. This is...Esteban...another cleaning man. He doesn't speak English either. Esteban, el flooro.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39736
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Danny
You know what? I may have parked my car in a compact space, and I hate when I see others do that, so-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39737
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Meredith
Danny, I feel a real connection to you, and I gotta get real, I'm-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39738
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Michael
No, no, no....
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39739
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Jim
No, no, no, no...
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39740
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Michael
I'm goin 'in!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39741
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Dwight
Michael! No, Michael, stop it! No!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39742
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Michael
Stop, stop! Oh, my god! Okay. Stop it, stop it, stop it. Gross! Stop it, please. Everybody, stop.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39743
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Danny
Michael Scott.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39744
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Michael
I said stop. Okay, Danny...this is not Pennsylvania Solartech. This is Dunder-Mifflin Paper Company. This is Meredith Palmer-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39745
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Meredith
Please to meet you-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39746
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Michael
Don't! Get away from him. Please, just leave. Get out of here. Go. Forever.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39747
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Danny
Hmm.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39748
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Michael
I owe you...a most sincere and humble apology. We were trying to watch you to see your sales technique, so we could stop losing so many clients to you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39749
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Danny
But from where?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39750
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Michael
A surveillance room next to this one.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39751
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Danny
Okay, so you...set up this fake company, then you hired this homeless woman to impersonate an executive to spy on me so that you could copy my sales technique?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39752
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Michael
Yes. And it's the sincerest form of flattery.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39753
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Danny
Or...crazy.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39754
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Michael
Well-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39755
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Danny
I'm gonna go.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39756
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Michael
Okay. You know what, it wasn't just me. Jim and Dwight are behind that wall in the surveillance room and it was their plan as well.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39757
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Dwight
No!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39758
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Jim
No, no, no, no.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39759
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Danny
Oh, well then, yeah. All right. Hey! Good luck, guys. Seems like you got a great operation here.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39760
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Michael
No, we don't. Here's-here's my point. Danny, listen, you have to understand that we are not normally like this. We just-we wanted to know your tricks.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39761
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Danny
What do you mean, my tricks? There's no tricks, man. I'm just a good salesman. You wanna copy that? You can't copy that!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39762
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Michael
You are, you are. You are! Stop it, stop it. Stop. You are a good salesman. And because of that...I want you to work for me.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39763
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Danny
Sure. You seem like a fun, professional guy.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39764
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Michael
So, you will?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39765
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Danny
No!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39766
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Michael
Hold it, hold it. Hold on, hold on. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait. Wait. Danny, I want you to look at me. Do you want your life to be better...or to be worse or to stay the same?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39767
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Danny
Get out of my way.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39768
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Michael
Answer the question. Do you want a better life, Danny?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39769
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Danny
I swear to God, I'm gonna hit you. I didn't mean that. I'm sorry. I'm not-it's just I'm very upset right now.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39770
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Michael
I know, I know.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39771