Every line from The Office season 7, episode 5, in script order. First aired October 21, 2010.
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Darryl
I'm very busy with time-sensitive work.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39572
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Andy
Not to go all Sherlock Holmes on you, but I can tell by the reflection in your glasses that you're entering points into Weight Watchers dot com.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39573
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Darryl
If you don't enter them immediately, you forget. What?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39574
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Andy
I'm starting a band and I need you on keyboards.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39575
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Darryl
Nah. I play for pleasure.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39576
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Andy
This is for pleasure.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39577
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Darryl
I wouldn't enjoy that.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39578
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Andy
I'm willing to pay you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39579
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Darryl
Oh, yeah?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39580
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Andy
Yeah.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39581
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Darryl
How much?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39582
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Andy
Sixty bucks a session.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39583
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Darryl
That's crazy money. I'll take forty.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39584
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Andy
Yes!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39585
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Dwight
There he is.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39586
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Michael
Oh, no, that's a male model.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39587
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Jim
No, that's him.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39588
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Michael
That...hello. Michael Scott, Dunder-Mifflin Paper Company.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39589
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Danny
Danny Cordray, Osprey Paper.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39590
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Michael
Nice to meet you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39591
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Danny
Three of you guys for one sale.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39592
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Michael
Yeah, well...we call it overkill. Why am I telling you my strategy?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39593
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Danny
Well, whatever works for ya. Anyway. All right.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39594
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Michael
All right.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39595
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Danny
It's good to see you guys. Nice to meet you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39596
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Michael
Buh-bye. I could swear that guy was a male model.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39597
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Receptionist
He's ready for you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39598
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Michael
Oh, thank you. All right. On the count of three, it's showtime. Ready, one, two--
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39599
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Jim
Nope, not doing that.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39600
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Dwight
I've been in showtime mode since breakfast.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39601
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Michael
Okay, you know-all right, just forget it then.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39602
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Jim
Showtime!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39603
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Michael
It's showtime! Oh...never mind. Let's go.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39604
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Michael
When I knock on your door, you know who it is; it's Michael Scott. We've been together forever and we-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39605
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Steve
Michael, I appreciate everything that Dunder-Mifflin has done for this company.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39606
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Michael
You know what? You are having some problems with your loading dock, are you not? All right. We're going to deliver to you on weekends.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39607
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Steve
That's very generous, but-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39608
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Michael
And you know what else we're gonna do? I can't believe I'm gonna say this...we are going to offer you our paper at cost. I know. I could get in a lotta trouble for this, so you'd better shake my hand right now.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39609
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Dwight
He's not kidding.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39610
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Michael
Shake it, shake it!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39611
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Steve
Michael, I'm going with Danny.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39612
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Dwight
Oh.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39613
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Steve
Thanks for coming in.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39614
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Michael
Okay. Thank you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39615
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Steve
Thank you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39616
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Michael
Thanks, Steve.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39617
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Dwight
Jim talked too much.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39618
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Jim
No, I didn't.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39619
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Dwight
Yes, you did.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39620
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Michael
Stop it. Just stop it. We did what we should have done, we just got bested. Why is there a door close button if it doesn't even close the door?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39621
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Michael
How do I feel about losing the sale? It's like if Michael Phelps came out of retirement, jumped in the pool, belly-flopped, and drowned.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39622
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Michael
You know who we always lose out to? Staples, the big guys. Osprey? They're a small company. They're smaller than we are. What's our excuse? How do we combat this guy? Stanley, how do we combat him?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39623
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Stanley
We sell better?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39624
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Michael
Okay. You know what? You clearly don't care, so why don't you just leave?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39625
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Stanley
I would like to stay. This pertains to me.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39626
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Michael
Why don't you go outside and...take a shot of insulin and have a nap, okay?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39627
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Stanley
Why do you always assume I have diabetes?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39628
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Michael
I don't know, your frame, your build-why don't you have a glass of apple juice and tell me you're not a diabetic. See? I could tell by the sound you made when you stood up that you have-okay. Yes, Phyllis?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39629
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Phyllis
I could try to seduce him.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39630
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Michael
Oh, my god!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39631
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Dwight
I know how we can learn his tricks.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39632
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Dwight
What I am about to show you is of the utmost secrecy.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39633
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Jim
Is that your office?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39634
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Dwight
Yes, Jim. And with a little tweaking, it becomes a different office. We lure Danny to it and watch him sell.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39635
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Phyllis
Uh...
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39636
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Stanley
I'm outta here.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39637
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Phyllis
This is weird.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39638
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Michael
You know what this is? This is a stinger.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39639
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Jim
A what?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39640
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Michael
Like the movie.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39641
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Jim
I think you mean The Sting.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39642
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Michael
Paul Newman, Robert Redford. They're bank robbers.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39643
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Jim
Nope. Different movie.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39644
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Dwight
The Sting. The Sting.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39645
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Erin
Your two o'clock.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39646
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Meredith
Thanks, hun.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39647
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Jim
Meredith was the perfect choice to play the head of the company. Her lunch break lined up with our appointment with Danny and...that's it. That's really all we were looking for.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39648
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Danny
Danny Cordray. It's great to meet you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39649
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Meredith
Meredith Van Helsing. Pleased to meet you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39650
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Jim
Meredith Van Helsing?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39651
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Dwight
Van Helsing was a respected professor before he was a vampire killer.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39652
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Jim
Okay. But what is he more famous for?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39653
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Michael
Shhh! Hey! That's my mug.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39654
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Jim
You know this isn't real TV, right?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39655
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Michael
Yes.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39656
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Darryl and Andy
Please Mr. President, if you wanna give hope a whirl, bring our troops home safe and sound, says this little girl.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39657
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Andy
Please Mr. President-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39658
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Darryl
One second, one second, one second. So, this song is from the point of view of a little girl?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39659
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Andy
Yeah.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39660
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Darryl
But you're singing it.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39661
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Andy
Yeah, but I'm using my falsetto.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39662
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Darryl
No, that's not a good idea. I don't see that as a very good song.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39663
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Andy
Yeah, well, it'd sound a lot better if you actually sang with some soul.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39664
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Darryl
Oh, I never sing with soul.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39665
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Andy
That's a lie.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39666
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Kevin
I could sing it.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39667
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Andy
I just was hoping to maybe save your voice in case we did a novelty song about frogs.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39668
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Kevin
But my voice is unique. Like Bob Dylan.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39669
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Andy
Okay, three-way argument between a drummer, a keyboardist, and the front man lead singer. Wonder who's gonna win this one. Two, three, four-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39670
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Danny
I'm gonna take off my coat, if you don't mind. It's a bit warm in here.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Line 39671