Every quote from The Office season 7, episode 5, in script order. First aired October 21, 2010.
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Darryl
I'm very busy with time-sensitive work.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39572
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Andy
Not to go all Sherlock Holmes on you, but I can tell by the reflection in your glasses that you're entering points into Weight Watchers dot com.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39573
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Darryl
If you don't enter them immediately, you forget. What?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39574
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Andy
I'm starting a band and I need you on keyboards.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39575
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Darryl
Nah. I play for pleasure.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39576
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Andy
This is for pleasure.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39577
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Darryl
I wouldn't enjoy that.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39578
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Andy
I'm willing to pay you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39579
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Darryl
Oh, yeah?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39580
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Andy
Yeah.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39581
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Darryl
How much?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39582
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Andy
Sixty bucks a session.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39583
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Darryl
That's crazy money. I'll take forty.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39584
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Andy
Yes!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39585
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Dwight
There he is.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39586
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Michael
Oh, no, that's a male model.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39587
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Jim
No, that's him.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39588
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Michael
That...hello. Michael Scott, Dunder-Mifflin Paper Company.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39589
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Danny
Danny Cordray, Osprey Paper.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39590
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Michael
Nice to meet you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39591
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Danny
Three of you guys for one sale.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39592
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Michael
Yeah, well...we call it overkill. Why am I telling you my strategy?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39593
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Danny
Well, whatever works for ya. Anyway. All right.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39594
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Michael
All right.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39595
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Danny
It's good to see you guys. Nice to meet you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39596
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Michael
Buh-bye. I could swear that guy was a male model.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39597
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Receptionist
He's ready for you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39598
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Michael
Oh, thank you. All right. On the count of three, it's showtime. Ready, one, two--
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39599
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Jim
Nope, not doing that.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39600
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Dwight
I've been in showtime mode since breakfast.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39601
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Michael
Okay, you know-all right, just forget it then.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39602
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Jim
Showtime!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39603
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Michael
It's showtime! Oh...never mind. Let's go.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39604
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Michael
When I knock on your door, you know who it is; it's Michael Scott. We've been together forever and we-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39605
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Steve
Michael, I appreciate everything that Dunder-Mifflin has done for this company.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39606
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Michael
You know what? You are having some problems with your loading dock, are you not? All right. We're going to deliver to you on weekends.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39607
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Steve
That's very generous, but-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39608
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Michael
And you know what else we're gonna do? I can't believe I'm gonna say this...we are going to offer you our paper at cost. I know. I could get in a lotta trouble for this, so you'd better shake my hand right now.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39609
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Dwight
He's not kidding.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39610
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Michael
Shake it, shake it!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39611
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Steve
Michael, I'm going with Danny.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39612
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Dwight
Oh.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39613
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Steve
Thanks for coming in.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39614
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Michael
Okay. Thank you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39615
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Steve
Thank you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39616
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Michael
Thanks, Steve.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39617
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Dwight
Jim talked too much.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39618
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Jim
No, I didn't.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39619
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Dwight
Yes, you did.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39620
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Michael
Stop it. Just stop it. We did what we should have done, we just got bested. Why is there a door close button if it doesn't even close the door?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39621
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Michael
How do I feel about losing the sale? It's like if Michael Phelps came out of retirement, jumped in the pool, belly-flopped, and drowned.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39622
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Michael
You know who we always lose out to? Staples, the big guys. Osprey? They're a small company. They're smaller than we are. What's our excuse? How do we combat this guy? Stanley, how do we combat him?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39623
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Stanley
We sell better?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39624
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Michael
Okay. You know what? You clearly don't care, so why don't you just leave?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39625
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Stanley
I would like to stay. This pertains to me.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39626
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Michael
Why don't you go outside and...take a shot of insulin and have a nap, okay?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39627
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Stanley
Why do you always assume I have diabetes?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39628
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Michael
I don't know, your frame, your build-why don't you have a glass of apple juice and tell me you're not a diabetic. See? I could tell by the sound you made when you stood up that you have-okay. Yes, Phyllis?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39629
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Phyllis
I could try to seduce him.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39630
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Michael
Oh, my god!
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39631
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Dwight
I know how we can learn his tricks.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39632
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Dwight
What I am about to show you is of the utmost secrecy.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39633
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Jim
Is that your office?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39634
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Dwight
Yes, Jim. And with a little tweaking, it becomes a different office. We lure Danny to it and watch him sell.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39635
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Phyllis
Uh...
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39636
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Stanley
I'm outta here.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39637
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Phyllis
This is weird.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39638
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Michael
You know what this is? This is a stinger.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39639
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Jim
A what?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39640
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Michael
Like the movie.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39641
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Jim
I think you mean The Sting.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39642
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Michael
Paul Newman, Robert Redford. They're bank robbers.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39643
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Jim
Nope. Different movie.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39644
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Dwight
The Sting. The Sting.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39645
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Erin
Your two o'clock.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39646
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Meredith
Thanks, hun.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39647
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Jim
Meredith was the perfect choice to play the head of the company. Her lunch break lined up with our appointment with Danny and...that's it. That's really all we were looking for.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39648
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Danny
Danny Cordray. It's great to meet you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39649
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Meredith
Meredith Van Helsing. Pleased to meet you.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39650
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Jim
Meredith Van Helsing?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39651
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Dwight
Van Helsing was a respected professor before he was a vampire killer.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39652
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Jim
Okay. But what is he more famous for?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39653
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Michael
Shhh! Hey! That's my mug.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39654
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Jim
You know this isn't real TV, right?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39655
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Michael
Yes.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39656
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Darryl and Andy
Please Mr. President, if you wanna give hope a whirl, bring our troops home safe and sound, says this little girl.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39657
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Andy
Please Mr. President-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39658
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Darryl
One second, one second, one second. So, this song is from the point of view of a little girl?
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39659
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Andy
Yeah.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39660
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Darryl
But you're singing it.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39661
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Andy
Yeah, but I'm using my falsetto.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39662
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Darryl
No, that's not a good idea. I don't see that as a very good song.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39663
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Andy
Yeah, well, it'd sound a lot better if you actually sang with some soul.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39664
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Darryl
Oh, I never sing with soul.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39665
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Andy
That's a lie.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39666
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Kevin
I could sing it.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39667
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Andy
I just was hoping to maybe save your voice in case we did a novelty song about frogs.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39668
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Kevin
But my voice is unique. Like Bob Dylan.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39669
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Andy
Okay, three-way argument between a drummer, a keyboardist, and the front man lead singer. Wonder who's gonna win this one. Two, three, four-
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39670
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Danny
I'm gonna take off my coat, if you don't mind. It's a bit warm in here.
Season 7 · Episode 5 · Quote 39671