Every line from The Office season 7, episode 15, in script order. First aired February 10, 2011.
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Erin
Ha!
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42938
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Gabe
I hear them kissing all the time. It's this horrible plipping sound. You know, it's like Chinese water torture. Just...like it's coming from my own head.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42939
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Michael
Sit. Okay, just close your eyes.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42940
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Holly
Ohh. Can you get lower?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42941
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Michael
Oh, yeah.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42942
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Holly
A little lower.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42943
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Holly
I cannot keep myself from Michael. Everything he does is sexy. He has this undeniable animal magnetism. He's a jungle cat. The man exudes sex. He can put both his legs behind his head.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42944
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Gabe
Thank you all for meeting on such sort notice.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42945
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Michael
[clears throat]
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42946
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Gabe
Yes?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42947
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Michael
Yes. Michael Scott, Dunder Mifflin. What is the purpose of this meeting?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42948
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Gabe
Seeing as it's Valentine's Day, I felt it would be apropos to have a little refresher course on romance in the workplace.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42949
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Michael
Perfect. Yes. It is quite apro-propriate. Carry on.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42950
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Gabe
First things first. An office romance is permissible. Not something you'd expect to hear from corporate. Well, guess what. Sabre is 100% tolerant of office romances.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42951
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Ryan
Speaking of, Gabe, I don't see Erin at this meeting.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42952
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Meredith
Uh, I also don't see Andy.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42953
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Kevin
Oooh.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42954
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Jim
OOH! Boom! Face!
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42955
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Gabe
I get it. Andy's slamming my girlfriend. Very funny. What I do not approve of, however, is public displays of affection, or PDAs. PDAs are totally superfluous to a happy, healthy office romance. Perfect example. Look at Jim and Pam.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42956
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Pam
Yeah. What? Us?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42957
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Gabe
They don't touch. They don't kiss. You would hardly even know that they were husband and wife.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42958
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Jim
Did it!
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42959
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Pam
Yeah!
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42960
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Jim
Love it. Keep it goin.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42961
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Gabe
Okay. So, PDAs. That's gonna include behaviors such as hugging, kissing, uh...
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42962
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Kevin
Booby honking.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42963
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Gabe
Yeah, booby honking. Sure.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42964
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Kevin
Butt honking.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42965
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Gabe
Butt honking. Yeah, all the honking.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42966
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Creed
The one where you start in a crouches position, then you leap...
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42967
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Gabe
Sure. Basically, there's no precise definition, but you know it when you see it. Ahem.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42968
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Oscar
Are you guys listening to this?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42969
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Michael
What, are you talking about me and Holly?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42970
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Pam
Yeah!
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42971
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Gabe
Maybe you find your own chair.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42972
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Holly
So we kiss occasionally.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42973
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Oscar
Not occasionally. All the time.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42974
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Phyllis
Yeah, and it's not just the kissing. It's the flirtatious whispering.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42975
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Stanley
The flirtatious tickling.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42976
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Michael
Whispering and tickling have their place in business.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42977
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Darryl
That thing were you softly exhale on her neck.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42978
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Michael
I... Okay, yeah, that's pretty hot. I will give you that. Look, you are all hypocrites. You all do it.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42979
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Dwight
Michael. Confession: I have done PDA in the office.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42980
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Michael
Thank you.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42981
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Dwight
I've had intercourse in the office.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42982
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Michael
All right.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42983
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Dwight
As has Angela!
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42984
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Angela
Dwight!
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42985
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Dwight
As has Ryan. As has Kelly. As has Meredith. As has Phyllis. As has Darryl. As has Creed. As has Michael and as has Holly.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42986
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Kevin
As has Kevin!
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42987
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Angela
With who?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42988
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Kevin
She goes to another school.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42989
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Michael
Okay. Fine. No more PDA.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42990
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Oscar
Good.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42991
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Michael
You win. But here's what we are going to do. We are going to designate one of our closets as a hook-up zone.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42992
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Angela
No.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42993
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Michael
Anything goes.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42994
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Oscar
Just leave it how you said...
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42995
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Dwight
Michael, that's absurd. What if two couples want to go at the same time?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42996
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Michael
Okay, then we have two closets. No, no, we're gonna have three closets, one for each base, no homers. Yes?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42997
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Dwight
And what is the hook-up zone policy on masturbation?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42998
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Michael
Pro.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 42999
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Dwight
Yes!
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43000
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Michael
What? Problem solved.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43001
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Michael
No, no, it's great. I love working at Dunder Mifflin, a division of Taliban enterprises.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43002
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Pam
That's weird. I mean, that's weird to have sex in the office. That's where you work, right?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43003
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Jim
Mm-hmm.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43004
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Pam
You know, you're in a meeting, and nobody knows that you've had sex there, except for you and him.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43005
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Jim
Ew.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43006
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Erin
Don't mind us. You keep working.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43007
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Darryl
Okay. I'll keep working.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43008
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Erin
Oh, my God. It's a song.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43009
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Andy
Whoa.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43010
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Erin
What do you think is on it?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43011
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Andy
We should actually probably talk about it outside or we might make Darryl mad.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43012
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Erin
Not if we're talking like this. I think it's okay. He doesn't seem to hear us.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43013
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Andy
I think he can hear us.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43014
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Andy
That makes sense, 'cause I feel like I'd be able to hear us at this level.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43015
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Erin
Darryl.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43016
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Andy
Darryl is a jerk.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43017
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Erin
No, he's not.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43018
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Andy
No, I'm just testing if he can hear.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43019
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Darryl
I can hear you.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43020
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Andy
Oh. Okay.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43021
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Erin
Okay. Then no more talking. Let's just play the song.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43022
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Boom Box
The temp at night. The temp at night. The temp at night. The temp at night.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43023
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Andy
The temp at night?
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43024
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Erin
What do you...
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43025
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Darryl
You got it. Pick it up. Take it out.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43026
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Andy
Pi...
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43027
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Darryl
Pick it up.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43028
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Andy
Okay.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43029
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Darryl
Take it out. Pick it up. Pick it up. Pick it up. Take it out.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43030
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Andy
Right. Okay.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43031
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Holly
Sorry to interrupt. Forgot to collect my things.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43032
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Michael
Ah, the old 'leave behind.' Oldest trick in the book. Good thing it's working.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43033
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Holly
Oh, no. Michael, I don't want to make people uncomfortable.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43034
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Michael
Since when is comfort the most important thing? I mean, I don't... I don't sit on your lap because it's comfortable. I sit on your lap because I like the way your thighs feel on my butt.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43035
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Holly
Yeah, but if they're uncomfortable, it makes me uncomfortable.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43036
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Michael
Oh. Okay. Well, if it makes you uncomfortable, then we'll stop.
Season 7 · Episode 15 · Line 43037