Every quote from The Office season 6, episode 23, in script order. First aired May 13, 2010.
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Angela
I want eye contact.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38043
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Dwight
No.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38044
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Angela
Yes.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38045
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Dwight
Do you understand how rare is that in nature?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38046
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Angela
I'm not some farm animal.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38047
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Andy
Great game, coach.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38048
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Michael
Shh! Okay, all right. Don't, don't.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38049
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Andy
You guys are awesome! Best game I've ever seen in my life.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38050
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Shane
Yeah, right. You must be rootin' for the other guys.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38051
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Andy
Ha. The other guys can go die.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38052
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Michael
Okay.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38053
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Andy
Baseball! Go talk to him.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38054
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Michael
No. God. You go talk to him.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38055
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Shane
Let's go.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38056
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Andy
Shane. Great game man!
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38057
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Shane
Do I know you?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38058
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Andy
No. Uh, just big fans. Both of us.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38059
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Shane
Are you somebody's... parents? Oh, are you guys... Kenny's dads?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38060
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Andy
Ha. No. No. But we're gay for baseball.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38061
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Shane
Okay.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38062
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Andy
But I have a wife, actually, who I really love a lot.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38063
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Shane
Okay. Let's go!
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38064
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Andy
Yeah. I am so into the institution of marriage.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38065
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Shane
Whoa!
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38066
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Andy
I mean, isn't marriage the best, you know? Two good people finding each other, getting all committed to each other. So you love baseball. What else do you love? Let's round you out as a person.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38067
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Shane
Hey, I'm really sorry, I'm just trying to... focus here on the game.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38068
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Andy
I get it, man. I love it. That's what makes you a good coach. You know, but as a fan, it just helps me enjoy the game better if I know the coach loves his wife.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38069
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Shane
Of course. Okay? I gotta... get back to this.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38070
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Andy
Of course.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38071
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Shane
All right.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38072
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Andy
But real quick, I want you to meet my associate. Sheldon!
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38073
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Michael
No, no, no.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38074
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Andy
Come on, get over here.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38075
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Michael
I'm good. Oh, my God.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38076
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Andy
Get- Get over here. Sheldon, say hi to the nice coach.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38077
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Michael
Sorry. I got some stomach cramps.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38078
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Shane
It's all right. It's all right. Keep it going.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38079
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Michael
Well, that was not at all what I expected. Hoo hoo! Whoo. My heart's still racing. I just looked a man in the eyes and I shook his hand. All the time I was thinking, 'I'm sleeping with your wife.' And you know who does that? James freakin' Bond.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38080
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Michael
Okay, orange slices. There ya go.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38081
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Erin
Thanks, Michael.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38082
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Michael
Don't thank me. Thank Dylan's mom. Here you go! Oh! Ooh Hoo Hoo Hoo hoo!
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38083
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Oscar
Why would you throw something wet at me?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38084
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Michael
You love it. There ya go.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38085
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Jim
Now, were those for the team?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38086
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Michael
Uh, no, they didn't say team. They just said coal Hawks.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38087
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Jim
Ah.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38088
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Pam
I don't think those were yours to take.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38089
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Michael
Well, then it wouldn't be the first time I stole something away from Coach Shane.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38090
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Andy
I just wanna go on record as saying that I do not condone this affair, and I went so far as to force Michael to confront the victim of his behavior.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38091
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Pam
Did you talk to him?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38092
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Michael
I did.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38093
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Pam
You talked to the man whose wife you're having an affair with.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38094
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Kevin
Wow. That is crazy.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38095
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Phyllis
Was there a fistfight?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38096
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Michael
No. We just talked. He's very nice.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38097
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Phyllis
And it didn't change your mind.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38098
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Michael
It did not.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38099
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Phyllis
Michael, that's awful.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38100
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Michael
Isn't it?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38101
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Phyllis
Yes.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38102
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Michael
I'm awful, aren't I?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38103
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Kevin
Yeah. That's pretty bad.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38104
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Michael
I'm an awful guy! Ooh!
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38105
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Oscar
How can you live with yourself?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38106
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Michael
I am what I am, Oscar. And I want what I want. And right now, I want a piece of cake. From now on, when I'm hungry, I am going to eat whatever I am hungry for.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38107
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Kevin
That is a dangerous game, friendo.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38108
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Kelly
Well, because I thought that it was a book about Anthropology the store.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38109
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Ryan
I don't know why you were in that part of the bookstore.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38110
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Kelly
Cause it's next to they baby section, okay?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38111
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Ryan
All right, that makes more sense. You should have said that at the beginning when you said, 'I read a book about anthropology.'
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38112
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Kelly
I don't really know why you're screaming at me right now.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38113
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Ryan
I'm not scream-- I'm not screaming.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38114
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Kelly
That's Meredith's cake. It's her birthday.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38115
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Michael
I don't care. I have an appetite for life! Mmm. Mmm! Oh, god. That's Lemon.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38116
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Ryan
Good for you, man. Good for you.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38117
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Ryan
He takes what he wants.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38118
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Ryan
You know what? I think you're attractive, and I wanna sleep with you.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38119
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Erin
What about Kelly?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38120
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Ryan
You read my mind.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38121
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Erin
Is this a joke?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38122
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Ryan
Yep.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38123
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Ryan
It's hard to live that way man. You gotta really not care what people think about you. I-I don't know how you do it, Michael, I-I-I can't be that cold.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38124
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Michael
You'll learn, baby. You'll learn.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38125
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Dwight
I am an honorable man, and I will honor the contract. But I don't have to give her the good stuff. Schrute sperm are strong, but they're no match for a grown Schrute man. Let's see what she gets. Aah!
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38126
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Creed
Uh, boss, we're out of paper.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38127
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Michael
Yeah, I noticed that.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38128
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Creed
Are you gonna add any more?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38129
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Michael
Nope.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38130
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Creed
He don't give an 'F' about nothin'!
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38131
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Michael
I have got big balls.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38132
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Pam
I don't think I'm gonna make it.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38133
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Jim
What about an energy drink or something?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38134
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Pam
It gets in the breast milk. If I drink it, Cece drinks it six hours later.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38135
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Jim
Well, it doesn't mean I can't drink it.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38136
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Pam
Well, it does and it doesn't.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38137
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Darryl
Probably shouldn't tell you this, but a lotta guys in the warehouse work multiple jobs, so... we have a place.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38138
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Jim
A place?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38139
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Darryl
A restful location. Talk to Glen. He'll take you up in the lift.
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38140
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Pam
You sleep in the warehouse?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38141
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Darryl
Lightbulb's burnt out, so it's dark. And the heat from the backup generator keeps it nice and warm. Sometimes I think about it when I'm trying to fall asleep at home. But as far as the rest of the office goes, it doesn't exist, okay?
Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 38142