"The Deposition" Quotes (page 3)

Every quote from The Office season 4, episode 8, in script order. First aired November 15, 2007.

300 quotes · page 3 of 3

  1. Dwight

    Wait a minute, Darryl is the client? ...No, no, no. He works here, dumbass.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20368

  2. Jim

    ...Right. Spin-serve!

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20369

  3. Michael

    How can you do that to me?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20370

  4. Jan

    [looks at Lester]

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20371

  5. Lester

    You can respond, just remember it's all going into the record.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20372

  6. Jan

    Michael, I am not the enemy, OK? Dunder Mifflin is the enemy.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20373

  7. Michael

    Dunder Mifflin has always treated me with the utmost respect, with loyalty. They were going to give me your job and I should have taken it.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20374

  8. Jan

    Alright, wait. Before you go any further, let me show you what kind of loyalty they have, OK? Lester, please read that part of Wallace's deposition.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20375

  9. Lester

    Starting at paragraph 6. Council: 'Mr. Wallace, regarding Michael Scott, was he a contender to replace Jan Levinson?' David Wallace: 'Yes.'

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20376

  10. Michael

    See? I was his number 1 contender. I was being groomed.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20377

  11. Lester

    Council: 'Was he your first choice?' David Wallace: 'Michael Scott is a fine employee who has been with the company for many years.'

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20378

  12. Council

    Was he in the top 5 of contenders?' David Wallace: 'What do you want me to say? Come on, he's a nice guy. There were many people that I considered.' Council: 'Was he seriously being considered for the corporate job?' David Wallace: 'No.'

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20379

  13. Lester

    I have one more question, Mr. Scott. Wouldn't you agree with Ms. Levinson that the company exhibits a pattern of disrespect toward its employees?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20380

  14. Michael

    ...Absolutely not.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20381

  15. Pam

    Yes! Way to go. See that?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20382

  16. Kelly

    Yeah, the floppy haired girl you date won a point.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20383

  17. Darryl

    19, serving 4.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20384

  18. Kelly

    Woooh! Nice baby! Nice one! Hey, hey, you, you! I don't like your boyfriend! Cuz, cuz, cuz, cuz, cuz he sucks at ping-pong!

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20385

  19. Pam

    You know what? I'm sick of this! Let's go, you and me!

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20386

  20. Kelly

    What?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20387

  21. Pam

    Let's go. Pick up a paddle.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20388

  22. Kelly

    OK. Bring it on.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20389

  23. Pam

    I am.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20390

  24. Kelly

    Think you can handle this?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20391

  25. Pam

    In my sleep.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20392

  26. Kelly

    OK. Volley for serve, P.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20393

  27. Pam

    O. P.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20394

  28. Kelly

    O.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20395

  29. Jim

    Do you want to go play on the table upstairs?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20396

  30. Darryl

    Yes.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20397

  31. David

    Michael. I am very sorry.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20398

  32. Michael

    Oh, hey no biggie. Just...

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20399

  33. David Wallace

    No, no, no, no, no. This was rough. We never meant for you to get caught in the middle of this. I'm very sorry.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20400

  34. Michael

    Hey, David?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20401

  35. David

    Yeah?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20402

  36. Michael

    I think you're a nice guy too.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20403

  37. David

    Thanks, Michael.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20404

  38. Michael

    Why did I do it? I don't know. Jan said that it was because of the photo that she revealed the diary. But she already brought the diary with her to New York, so... You expect to get screwed by your company, but you never expect to get screwed by your girlfriend.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20405

  39. Michael

    What do you want to do for dinner?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20406

  40. Jan

    How about Chinese?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20407

  41. Michael

    Sure trying to save some money... get something cheap.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20408

  42. Jan

    That was my cheap suggestion. Chinese was my cheap suggestion.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20409

  43. Michael

    Do you fast food?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20410

  44. Jan

    Fine, fast food's fine.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20411

  45. Jim

    So, where did you learn how to play?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20412

  46. Creed

    Cambodia. You?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20413

  47. Jim

    My friend's basement. All right, ready to start?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20414

  48. Creed

    Let's do this thing.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20415

  49. Jim

    What are you doing?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20416

  50. Creed

    We're not playing strip pong? Okay.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20417

  51. Oscar

    I totally see that.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20418

  52. Jim

    Right. There, first...

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20419

  53. Oscar

    Yeah, yeah.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20420

  54. Jim

    I think that's the question that you had...

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20421

  55. Pam

    What are you doing?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20422

  56. Oscar

    It's a problem with the client. I think, Jim...

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20423

  57. Pam

    Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Jim, come on, we gotta get in there and practice. Okay? I'm not kidding!

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20424

  58. Jim

    Wow.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20425

  59. Pam

    Now. Get good work done. Concentrate.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20426

  60. Jim

    All right.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20427

  61. Pam

    On your backhand.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20428

  62. Stanley

    Booyah!

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20429

  63. Phyllis

    Thought we were playing for fun.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20430

  64. Stanley

    No one paid me to say 'Booyah.' Now pick up the ball.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20431

  65. Phyllis

    But it's closer to you.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20432

  66. Stanley

    Now it isn't.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20433

  67. Jim

    What are you guys doing?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20434

  68. Phyllis

    Oh, we're in a meeting.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20435

  69. Jim

    Oh yeah, how long's this meeting going to last?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20436

  70. Angela

    I have next meeting!

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20437

  71. Andy

    I played a lot of pong growing up. I spent a lot of time on cruise ships. I'm also a monster snorkler.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20438

  72. Andy

    Okay, you know what, this table's not regulation.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20439

  73. Jim

    Good eye - it's an oval. You're measuring the table.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20440

  74. Andy

    Do you know anything about physics?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20441

  75. Jim

    Do you?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20442

  76. Andy

    Just serve. Let's go. Dammit! These balls are weighted weird, aren't they?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20443

  77. Jim

    Yup.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20444

  78. Andy

    Yeah. Get another one.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20445

  79. Jim

    Now, wait a minute. You're not gonna punch a wall, or me, or anything like that if you don't win the point, are you?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20446

  80. Andy

    I don't know! No, okay, just... serve!

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20447

  81. Michael

    I have some, uh, experience. I, um, once had to testify in a traffic accident case.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20448

  82. Man

    Then you're an old hand at this.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20449

  83. Michael

    Yes. My testimony was actually very important, um, because the accident was my fault. Tell Meredith I said it another time.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20450

  84. Jan

    Yes, Michael is going to be cross-examined today, which'll be very, very risky for me, nonetheless, not an easy decision to make, but it's a deposition. It's not going to be in front of a judge. And it's four million dollars.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20451

  85. Michael

    Before we continue, I would like to make an opening statement.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20452

  86. Man

    Fine. Please be brief.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20453

  87. Michael

    Ladies and gentlemen of... the... table. I would just like to say what a joy it is for me to be here today, but frankly, at my age, it's a joy to be anywhere. I'm only forty-four, so I'm not old, and I guess that doesn't really play. But the point is, I have a sense of humor. And I implore you all to have a sense of humor as well. Jan, David, my wonderful girlfriend, my gorgeous company... Why don't we all just take a big deep breath... and just relax. Good. That feels good. All right. Everybody feel better?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20454

  88. Diane Kelly

    Two years ago, when you quote 'kissed and fondled in the Chili's parking lot', were you aware of company guidelines specifically discouraging that behavior?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20455

  89. Michael

    Na, Na-oh, Naa-es.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20456

  90. Diane Kelly

    Yeah, I'm sorry, that's not a word.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20457

  91. Michael

    Ye-ohh. Ye-no.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20458

  92. Diane Kelly

    Okay. Were you aware that when Jan was with you, she claimed to be visiting clients, or, uh, traveling to see her sister in Scottsdale?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20459

  93. Michael

    Very nice!

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20460

  94. Diane Kelly

    I'm sorry. Excuse me?

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20461

  95. Michael

    High five!

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20462

  96. Jan

    Sometimes when he gets nervous he, uh, talks like Borat.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20463

  97. Diane Kelly

    Okay, Mr. Scott, would you mind, um, speaking in your normal voice for us. Please.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20464

  98. Michael

    Can't stop.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20465

  99. Diane Kelly

    Okay.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20466

  100. Michael

    Forgot normal talk.

    Season 4 · Episode 8 · Quote 20467