Every line from The Office season 4, episode 7, in script order. First aired November 8, 2007.
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Pam
Hmm.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 19994
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Dwight
We're here.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 19995
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Michael
Dwight will take my blindfold off when we are deep in the forest. Just the two of us from this point out.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 19996
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Dwight
Here we go. Just the two of us
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 19997
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Dwight
Here we go, into the wild. Mighty forest. Can you smell the trees and the nature?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 19998
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Dwight
Keep going, you're fine. Just some bushes and some thickets Keep going. You wanted wilderness, you got it.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 19999
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Jim
You know, try sending them another invoice.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20000
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Oscar
Ok.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20001
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Jim
Alright. Oh, did you see my memo by the way?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20002
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Oscar
'Let's be honest, as fun as birthdays are we could all use a break from the constant cake, so let's celebrate birthday month in style today.' This is really cool.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20003
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Jim
Right? I was just thinking...
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20004
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Oscar
No, totally, totally. This way we get it all out of the way at once and it could actually be fun.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20005
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Jim
Right! Exactly. Knew I could count on you.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20006
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Dwight
Good a spot as any.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20007
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Michael
What are you doing? Stop. Dwight, Dwight. Just --
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20008
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Dwight
I'm just --
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20009
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Michael
Stop.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20010
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Dwight
Spin. I'm trying to confuse your sense of direction. Behold.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20011
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Michael
Alright, good. Thank you, Dwight.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20012
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Dwight
Here's your knife. Here's your duct tape.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20013
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Michael
Alright, very good. Ahh, OK.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20014
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Dwight
Good luck, Michael.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20015
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Michael
Thanks for the ride. OK. Leave me be, Dwight.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20016
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Meredith
Hey, Jim, can I have my own cake?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20017
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Jim
What's that?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20018
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Meredith
I really prefer devils food cake.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20019
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Jim
Oh, sure.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20020
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Meredith
Yes!
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20021
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Jim
OK.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20022
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Pam
Wow! That was easy.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20023
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Jim
Yeah, people like me I guess.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20024
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Creed
Jim.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20025
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Creed
I hate devils food.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20026
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Jim
Well I think Meredith was just --
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20027
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Creed
Screw Meredith, I don't think it's fair to let someone else pick the cake on my birthday.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20028
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Jim
Everybody's birthday.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20029
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Creed
Today is actually my birthday and I want to pick the cake.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20030
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Jim
What do you want?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20031
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Creed
I want pie. I want peach pie.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20032
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Jim
You want a birthday pie?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20033
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Creed
I want a nice cobbler.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20034
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Jim
Well, I'm gonna to talk to Angela and we're gonna see what we can do about a pie.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20035
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Creed
I don't care who you talk to. Just make it happen.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20036
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Jim
It will be Angela.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20037
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Creed
You tell her it's for Creed. She'll know what that means.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20038
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Michael
Day One. I'm in the interior of the vast Pennsylvania wilderness. I've brought with me only the bare essentials. A knife, roll of duct tape, in case I need to craft some shelter or make some sort of water vessel. It's hot today. The sun is in the two-thirds easterly quadrant, which would make it about 2 o'clock in the afternoon. It's really beating down on me now. I think that I want to get a little more comfortable because the sun is depleting my resources. OK. OH, there we go. Watch that I don't hit my corroded artery here...
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20039
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Dwight
I lied to Michael. I said that I would leave him alone, but I will not. I will remain close by to provide unseen moral support, but I will never help him. I will let harm befall him. I will even let him die. But I will never let him lose his dignity.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20040
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Michael
There we go. Much better. Now everything I brought with me can be used. My sport coat here, can be fashioned into a backpack of sorts.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20041
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Michael
I'm going to wear what was once one of my pant legs.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20042
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Michael
See, this is a beautiful piece of material This could be used for all sorts of things.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20043
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Michael
Some sort of kerchief to keep my neck nice and comfortable.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20044
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Andy
Tuna.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20045
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Jim
Andy.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20046
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Andy
Me likey the ice cream cake, okay? Fudgie the Whale.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20047
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Jim
Not your birthday.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20048
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Andy
Well, I'm just saying, you know, if you want to make people happy, namely me, you will have a Fudgie the Whale.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20049
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Jim
Alright, I'll look into it, but the answer's no.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20050
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Andy
Wow, OK, harsh. Just don't expect me to show up.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20051
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Jim
Hey, Andy, I have some calls to make.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20052
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Andy
Loud and clear.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20053
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Jim
Alright.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20054
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Andy
Pizza rolls.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20055
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Jim
OK, I'm gonna go into this office here to do some work. So I will be in here.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20056
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Andy
Mushroom caps.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20057
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Michael
I am totally alone right now, with only my thoughts. I love it. I'm loving it. I can literally say anything I want. No one is gonna here me. Wish I could have gone with Ryan on that cool retreat! Jan has plastic boobs! I HAVE HEMORRHOIDS! Doesn't even matter.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20058
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Dwight
Michael is a man of great depth and passion. I don't know what he's searching for out here. I hope he finds it. Lunch.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20059
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Michael
Well it is a little chillier than I had thought, so I have fashioned my hat back into my pants. Several hours in, time for me to find some nourishment. Now, these woods are full of creatures that can sustain human life. Things like, uh, squirrels, nice juicy rabbit would be delicious.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20060
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Dwight
About two more minutes.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20061
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Michael
I have made this spear, with which I will impale my dinner. And it couldn't come a moment too soon because I have been without food for a good three hours or so. I'm startin' to feel it a little bit. Ohh... It's Creed's birthday. Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday to Creed. Happy Birthday to you. Happy birthday, buddy.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20062
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Meredith
What is Jim thinking? It's a birthday, so what if there's a lot of them?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20063
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Kevin
Yeah, I work hard all day. I like knowing that there's going to be a break. Most days I just sit and wait for the break.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20064
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Stanley
I took an extra shot of insulin in preparation for this cake today. If I don't have some cake soon, I might die.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20065
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Oscar
Why don't you just have an apple?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20066
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Stanley
Why don't you mind your business?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20067
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Creed
Listen, I figured this out. Jimmy had his birthday three weeks ago, so he doesn't care.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20068
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Oscar
Probably went to his head.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20069
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Creed
Yeah.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20070
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Oscar
Hey, Jim.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20071
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Jim
Hey guys, what're we talking about?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20072
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Creed
Nothing! Nothing going on. We're talking about nothing. C'mon gang.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20073
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Michael
Well if you take a look at this, I tented my pants. I've made myself a nice pants tent shelter. And this little guy may be Dunder Mifflin paper some day.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20074
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Dwight
Nothing to worry about. Just using the scope. Safety is... on.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20075
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Toby
Hey Jim.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20076
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Jim
Toby.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20077
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Toby
Hey, I just got the word on the communal birthdays. Great idea.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20078
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Jim
Oh, thanks man.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20079
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Toby
Yeah...
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20080
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Jim
Is there anything --
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20081
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Toby
My birthday was two months ago.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20082
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Jim
Oh, OK.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20083
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Toby
There was no party.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20084
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Jim
What?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20085
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Toby
Well, it... there was. But Michael scheduled it for 4:58 on a Friday. You know, people sang in the parking lot.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20086
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Jim
I remember that.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20087
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Toby
I don't know, I just thought you could include me.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20088
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Jim
Seriously?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20089
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Toby
I just though you could add me. I don't see the harm in that.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20090
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Jim
Toby's great. He's great, but sometimes he can be a little bit much. I don't see the harm in that. Well, it's a cake Toby, so, c'mon.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20091
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Jim
OK. Yeah, you know what, we're just gonna throw you in. Because more the merrier, right?
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20092
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Angela
No. No way. I am not a machine, Jim. You can't just change plans willy nilly and expect these little magic party elves to do your bidding. We already have devils food, peach cobbler, Fudgie the Whale, mushroom caps.
Season 4 · Episode 7 · Line 20093