Toby Flenderson Quotes from The Office

Human resources, and Michael's least favorite person.

936 quotes · page 1 of 10

1. Hey, we're not all going to sit in a circle Indian style are we?

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2. I'm sorry.

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3. I love their sandwiches.

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4. Really? Today?

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5. Oh, Happy Birthday.

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6. Yeah, I could say something.

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7. Hi, do you mind if I sign the card real quick?

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8. It's just a birthday card.

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9. There's some right there.

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10. Hi, nice to meet you.

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11. Hey, um did you go to uh, Bishop O'Hara?

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12. Yeah, me too.

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13. Eighty-nine.

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14. Yeah.

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15. A girl.

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16. [looks resigned]

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17. Hi.

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18. Hey, did you go to Bishop Ohara?

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19. Yeah, me too.

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20. 89.0

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21. It's just a snack.

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22. No.

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23. Just the once.

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24. Yes, that's true. I have never won a Dundie. I am more than okay with that.

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25. I'm just saying I don't think it's appropriate for you to have given Ryan that award.

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26. Okay, that is fine to feel, but not to act on.

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27. It wasn't a vote. You decided.

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28. Okay, that is not true.

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29. Cause Ryan asked me to talk to you.

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30. Michael?

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31. Um... I need to talk to you in your office. It'll just take two seconds.

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32. The full story is that Randall resigned because of sexual harassment. So Corporate asked me to do a five minute review of the Company Sexual Harassment policy.

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33. It's really not a big deal, Michael.

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34. And then Corporate is going to send in a lawyer...

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35. Just to refresh you... .

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36. on our policy.

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37. Maybe not some of them. Maybe not inappropriate ones.

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38. Yeah, okay. Corporate would like us to do a five minute review of the Company Sexual Harassment policy so I'll go over that later.

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39. So remember, intent is irrelevant. And that's it. Pam?

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40. Great point.

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41. Um... in fact, basic rule of thumb, let's just act everyday like Pam's Mom's coming in. All right. That's it. Um... if anybody has any questions about anything, you know where I sit in the back.

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42. Uh, yes!

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43. I can go over it with you.

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44. It's over.

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45. Office relationships are never a good idea. Yeah. So let's just try to avoid them. But, um, if you already have one, you should disclose it to HR.

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46. Ok, you know, Michael...

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47. No.

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48. Well, that would be...

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49. Okay, I'm lost.

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50. Hey Dwight.

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51. Sure.

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52. Technically, I am in Human Resources. And Dwight was asking about human anatomy. Um... I'm just sad the public school system failed him so badly.

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53. Yeah, maybe when you get really comfortable with each other, you can ask for that.

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54. I should get back to work.

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55. He talked the whole time.

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56. So it's like volleyball.

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57. Okay, you get a one-second hold on the ball...

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58. ...and you bounce it off the wall on your side of the tape.

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59. Yeah, Michael asked about it once. I just pretended not to hear him. He left.

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60. Say Anything, The Shining, Annie Hall, that's too obvious.

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61. Toy Story 2, one of the best movies I ever saw. I went for my daughter and stayed because you can't leave your daughter in a theater.

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62. Hey, Jim.

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63. Michael?

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64. Michael, do you have the name of the employee you're letting go? I'd like to start working on out-placement.

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65. I don't report to you, Michael. I report to the head of HR in New York.

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66. They would just send someone else. You need to have an HR representative.

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67. I know, Michael.

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68. Michael, it's almost 5:00.

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69. Um, ex-wife. Yeah. Um, her last name is 'Becker' now.

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70. You don't need to write 'ex'.

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71. Michael...

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72. Any word on those time cards?

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73. We want to go home.

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74. That is unbelievable.

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75. Aren't the suggestions meant for you?

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76. Yeah, I assumed Michael was already doing this. That's why I only use my personal e-mail account.

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77. I got Angela. She is into these posters of babies dressed as adults. I got her one of those. I felt kind of weird buying that.

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78. Well, it's for Angela, so ..

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79. We're really not supposed to serve alcohol.

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80. So, hey, you wanna trade?

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81. Really? You were gonna throw out a book?

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82. Oh, cool. It looks really interesting. What did you end up with? Sorry.

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83. Christmas.

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84. Hey, Brenda.

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85. I got lost.

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86. I guess I shouldn't have stopped for dinner.

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87. Wow, you just dive right into it.

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88. What, what happened?

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89. What do you need?

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90. I don't think Pam's gonna want to come into the men's room.

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91. Ryan, is, uh, dead.

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92. Dead.

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93. No. Can't, can't you just get up yourself? I... You only grilled your foot.

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94. Well you know, frankly a lot of us have been saying this for a long time.

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95. Yeah, and I, uh, I think that the very fact that we're including it in our agenda frankly, is a big step forward.

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96. I'm sorry?

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97. Uh, ok.

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98. Uh, great. Why don't we move on?

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99. Great. Because you that I think the very fact that

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100. You just got your corporate credit card back. Do you really want me to take it away again?

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