Kevin Malone Quotes from The Office (page 17)

Accountant, band frontman, chili enthusiast.

1,708 quotes · page 17 of 18

1. They do. It's awful. And, it's getting worse every day.

   Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57570

2. You don't know that.

   Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57613

3. James Bond was a spy.

   Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57616

4. Yeah. He was the best. James Bond would love this cupcake.

   Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57618

5. Oh, that was fantastic.

   Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57628

6. Why would you ask me?

   Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57662

7. My night was just like that. Meaning normal.

   Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57664

8. Nope. I did not see you either.

   Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57666

9. Ah.

   Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57668

10. Yeah. No, I understand, Pam. I understand.

    Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57670

11. Uh oh. She's doing it again.

    Season 9 · Episode 18 · Line 57680

12. What's going on? Oh, did Gangnam Style put out a new song?

    Season 9 · Episode 18 · Line 57736

13. Whoa. You go to the bathroom for 45 minutes and everything changes.

    Season 9 · Episode 18 · Line 57740

14. This is a documentary? Oh, I always thought we were like specimens in a human zoo.

    Season 9 · Episode 18 · Line 57741

15. Did you see this?

    Season 9 · Episode 18 · Line 57742

16. Andy, are there documentary groupies?

    Season 9 · Episode 18 · Line 57787

17. Of course.

    Season 9 · Episode 18 · Line 57789

18. What was that word they said when they showed me 'Skrald mand'? What's that mean in Danish? Cool guy?

    Season 9 · Episode 18 · Line 57795

19. Cool. Superhero.

    Season 9 · Episode 18 · Line 57797

20. Ooh, there's Angela! I work with her!

    Season 9 · Episode 19 · Line 58142

21. Yes! And I knew it the whole time! I kept the secret. I kept the secret so good. You didn't know, you didn't know, and you didn't freaking know. But I knew!

    Season 9 · Episode 19 · Line 58160

22. Yes, we did it!

    Season 9 · Episode 19 · Line 58162

23. Yes! Ohh! I did it. Ohh, I did it.

    Season 9 · Episode 19 · Line 58164

24. Ohh.

    Season 9 · Episode 19 · Line 58170

25. Yes!

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58353

26. Uh huh.

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58355

27. Of course.

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58357

28. Yes. In a way. From one that I bought on Craigslist.

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58359

29. No.

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58362

30. This is flatter.

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58364

31. I can't. I love them all too much. And, none of them fly. So that makes it harder.

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58367

32. Fine.

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58369

33. I'm not giving up. I'm going to keep making planes until one of them flies. Like Wilbur and Orville Redenbacher.

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58374

34. The Mark 47 is ready for launch. Less paste.

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58470

35. Wait, all of them?

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58522

36. I've never met anyone like that.

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58526

37. Could Andy make it as an entertainer? I don't know. You know who's really funny? This bird, in the park, that can't fly right. I'd pay to see him. But I don't have to cause the park is free!

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58595

38. Our question is'it seems dumb.

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58639

39. Well, Andy, your plan sucks, okay? Nobody is going to hire you ever. You're too character-y to be a lead and you're not fat enough to be a great character actor.

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58643

40. Ooh, there's a great play about a salesman.

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58726

41. I don't think so.

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58728

42. No, this one was written by Spongebob Squarepants.

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58730

43. Dwight's the new manager. He freaking did it.

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58758

44. Yeah, and Dwight, I'd like to be the first to say congratulations.

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58782

45. What do you think that was about?

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58807

46. Awesome!

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58837

47. Night, Oscar.

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58843

48. But the coffee in Peru is much hotter.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 58888

49. Ooh, announcement! Some of us whose televisions got broken during an all-you-can-eat shrimp commercial will be watching tonight at Poor Richard's. But note, all are welcome, not just those whose saw an all-you-can-eat shrimp commercial and charged their televisions.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 58952

50. Guys.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 58968

51. Guys.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 58970

52. Guys.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 58972

53. Do you want to see a video of a weatherman who says 'bold front' instead of 'cold front'? It's insane.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 58974

54. Philllip, Phillip, Phillip. It's all about Phillip. I hate Phillip.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 58978

55. Whoa.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59101

56. That's totally uncool.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59106

57. Right. Now.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59111

58. Oh, you know my name. Well, that is shocking.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59170

59. What? I'm moving the ink down in my pen, for work.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59172

60. Don't tell me what to do!

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59174

61. No, I don't need this! And you obviously don't need me.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59176

62. Away. Tell Phillip that his stupid little baby wish came true.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59178

63. He's not that smart. He doesn't know where I hid his duck.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59233

64. Can't hear you. I'm giving you the silence treatment. How does it feel being ignored?

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59256

65. Phillip got this for me?

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59261

66. That was a really cool move.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59263

67. Whoa.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59265

68. What a chubbers. Whoa.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59267

69. I'm losing my balance.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59269

70. Whoa!

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59272

71. You wanna play with the cactus?

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59275

72. So, me and Phillip were just talking and we decided we're gonna be best friends. He's a little standoffish at first. But once he starts buying you things, man, you can tell he likes you.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59277

73. Bye, Phillip. High five.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59339

74. Yeah.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59370

75. Sir, please. This show is about me and my attempts to find love in all the wrong places.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59376

76. Yes!

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59379

77. I feel scared a little.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59383

78. Yes! Whoo, whoo, whoo!

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59395

79. Yes! Wait, why?

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59399

80. 'Get out.'

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59401

81. What does that mean?

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59403

82. I'm'good.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59413

83. At least I got chocolate.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59417

84. Well, well, well, well, well, well. That's six 'wells.' Did I get that number right, Dwight?

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59628

85. Yes. I did. This one. Now get out!

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59630

86. Well, w'

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59637

87. You're just saying that to make me feel better.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59641

88. Is that all it was?

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59643

89. Come here

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59645

90. I missed you!

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59647

91. People actually dance to this. It's in my juke box. None of the money goes to Andy though.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59667

92. Yeah, people hate you.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59668

93. Where's the, uh, basket for gifts?

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59710

94. Okay.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59712

95. 'Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away. For lo, the winter is passed. The rain is over and gone. The time of singing has come and the voice of the turtledove is heard in our land. Let me see your face. Let me hear your voice for your voice is sweet and your face is comely. '

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59755

96. That's not'

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59758

97. What was that stuff?

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59789

98. Ooh! Yes. Uh, They left together a little while ago. Kelly was hoping that you would keep the baby so they can start a new life together.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59791

99. Oh, I don't know.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59793

100. Hey, this is better.

     Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59795