Creed Bratton Quotes from The Office (page 5)

Quality assurance, allegedly.

456 quotes · page 5 of 5

1. Haven't heard any complaints. Wouldn't care if I did.

   Season 8 · Episode 21 · Line 51860

2. Well, I don't want to get raped Twenty-Two!

   Season 8 · Episode 22 · Line 52054

3. Yeah, you.

   Season 8 · Episode 23 · Line 52304

4. Good, good. This carpet's overdue for a good mopping.

   Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52573

5. In the parking lot today there was a circus. The copier did tricks on the high-wire, a lady tried to give away a baby that looked like a cat. There was a Dwight impersonator and a Jim impersonator; a strong man crushed a turtle. I laughed and I cried. Not bad for a day in the life of a dog food company.

   Season 9 · Episode 1 · Line 53017

6. A wheel wants to spin, Pam.

   Season 9 · Episode 2 · Line 53031

7. I know you don't really exist.

   Season 9 · Episode 2 · Line 53063

8. I wanna work with, uh, Jimmy Carter and help build gnomes.

   Season 9 · Episode 2 · Line 53086

9. The Taliban is the worst. Great heroine, though.

   Season 9 · Episode 2 · Line 53100

10. I'm getting older. I'm losing my hair...

    Season 9 · Episode 4 · Line 53643

11. Thanks. Playing a little hookey from work today....Oh my god.

    Season 9 · Episode 4 · Line 53750

12. What?

    Season 9 · Episode 4 · Line 53878

13. Me neither.

    Season 9 · Episode 5 · Line 53969

14. It's Halloween. That is really, really good timing.

    Season 9 · Episode 5 · Line 53970

15. Yeah. That's what she said.

    Season 9 · Episode 5 · Line 54088

16. Yeah, she hosts the Dr. Laura Show.

    Season 9 · Episode 6 · Line 54188

17. I miss Clinton.

    Season 9 · Episode 7 · Line 54506

18. Let's find out what I did.

    Season 9 · Episode 8 · Line 54855

19. Remember, you're a scumbag, so you think scummy thoughts. Like this.

    Season 9 · Episode 8 · Line 54988

20. You did good. You did good.

    Season 9 · Episode 8 · Line 54998

21. Tapas swiss miss.

    Season 9 · Episode 9 · Line 55099

22. Spanish tapas, and swiss miss hot cocoa--What's so hard to understand?

    Season 9 · Episode 9 · Line 55100

23. Bald people make me sick.

    Season 9 · Episode 10 · Line 55470

24. Hey, uh, mayo buddy, five dollar tip, you unclog my ears. Okay?

    Season 9 · Episode 10 · Line 55517

25. Oh God. Stuck with the weirdo.

    Season 9 · Episode 10 · Line 55521

26. I'm sorry, Pam. It looks a little messy.

    Season 9 · Episode 10 · Line 55526

27. I'm sure it'll turn up.

    Season 9 · Episode 11 · Line 55696

28. I saw the leaves twitch!

    Season 9 · Episode 11 · Line 55858

29. You shut up!

    Season 9 · Episode 11 · Line 55860

30. Let's try it out.

    Season 9 · Episode 12 · Line 56007

31. Night

    Season 9 · Episode 12 · Line 56114

32. Uh, 6783's also a good time. Less mileage.

    Season 9 · Episode 14 · Line 56493

33. That's kinda uncool, man.

    Season 9 · Episode 16 · Line 57086

34. It's not cool.

    Season 9 · Episode 16 · Line 57096

35. Hey Erin, look who's back. The bird man.

    Season 9 · Episode 16 · Line 57316

36. She's looking good.

    Season 9 · Episode 16 · Line 57320

37. New glasses.

    Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57462

38. $3.75 a cupcake, actually. $3.67 if you buy a dozen.

    Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57560

39. I never forget a number. Names? In one ear and out the other. Places? Nope. Faces? That's rich. But, numbers? I have a gift. I guess that's why I'm an accountant.

    Season 9 · Episode 17 · Line 57561

40. Wesley Silver's gay?

    Season 9 · Episode 19 · Line 58167

41. They make a nice couple.

    Season 9 · Episode 19 · Line 58171

42. Two grand huh? I know a guy who can turn that into eight hundred dollars. And it's me.

    Season 9 · Episode 20 · Line 58491

43. I think just anybody could be a star. My postman, the night janitor here, but Andy? No, definitely not. Charisma black hole.

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58562

44. Creed Bratton is the new manager!

    Season 9 · Episode 21 · Line 58756

45. Oh, I'm saving a fortune on dry cleaning.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 58902

46. This airs tonight? Oh my god. If my parents see this, I am toast.

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 58954

47. Hey, grab a seat. We have that table and that table, but not that table or that table or that table. Floor's up for grabs. Meredith has been hogging the can. Oh!

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59368

48. Ok, thirty seconds to showtime!

    Season 9 · Episode 22 · Line 59382

49. Jeff Bomondo. I sell ceramic tile out of Newark.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59714

50. My wife's name is Kathryn. I can show you my social security card if it helps.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59716

51. Uh..ohh!

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59888

52. I saw a friend today. It had been a while. And we forgot each others names. But it didn't matter. 'Cause deep inside the feeling still remained the same'

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59889

53. I still have my medal from that.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59893

54. No, but I still have my medal from that.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59895

55. And all the faces that I know have that same familiar glow. I think I must have known them somewhere once before.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59902

56. It all seems so very arbitrary. I applied for a job at this company because they were hiring. I took a desk at the back because it was empty. But'no matter how you get there or where you end up, human beings have this miraculous gift to make that place home. Let's do this.

    Season 9 · Episode 23 · Line 59905