Creed Bratton Quotes from The Office (page 3)

Quality assurance, allegedly.

456 quotes · page 3 of 5

1. I don't get the big fuss here, I like the site.

   Season 4 · Episode 11 · Quote 21131

2. Hank, his name is Hank.

   Season 4 · Episode 11 · Quote 21233

3. A lot of jazz cats are blind, but they can play the piano like nobody's business. I'd like to put the piano in front of Pam without her glasses and see what happens. I'd also like to see her topless.

   Season 4 · Episode 12 · Quote 21592

4. Yeah, and I finished my work months ago!

   Season 4 · Episode 13 · Quote 21788

5. Hiya Pumpkin, it's Creed.

   Season 4 · Episode 13 · Quote 21826

6. Say, we're gonna ditch this bitch. You in?

   Season 4 · Episode 13 · Quote 21827

7. Are you out? Pumpkin's out, let's go gang!

   Season 4 · Episode 13 · Quote 21829

8. The pleasure's all mine.

   Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22113

9. Any time.

   Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22115

10. ...Excuse me.

    Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22117

11. What is wrong with this woman? She's asking about stuff that's nobody's business. 'What do I do?'... Really, what do I do here? I should've written it down. 'Qua' something, uh... qua... quar... quibo, qual...quir-quabity. Quabity assuance! No. No, no, no, no, but I'm getting close.

    Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22118

12. Hey, it's the kid! Look, look, look, look, look! Hey! It's the temp! Look!

    Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22307

13. It's the temp!

    Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22309

14. Mm-hmm.

    Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22312

15. I gave Toby my buddy Jorge's number in Costa. He'll hook Toby up with everything: cable TV, women, oh, and this amazing coffee to snort.

    Season 4 · Episode 14 · Quote 22613

16. I can bring these to my shelter.

    Season 5 · Episode 1 · Quote 22620

17. Fright. Being scared to death.

    Season 5 · Episode 1 · Quote 22809

18. Oh nothing.

    Season 5 · Episode 1 · Quote 22872

19. That wasn't a tapeworm.

    Season 5 · Episode 1 · Quote 22875

20. Hell of an ass.

    Season 5 · Episode 1 · Quote 22993

21. The tall guy got engaged.

    Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23206

22. I've done some things I'm not proud of. Committed some atrocities in Vietnam, uh, two years ago. Princess Cruise Lines.

    Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23406

23. Must be like the tide at Omaha Beach.

    Season 5 · Episode 3 · Quote 23628

24. Ugh.

    Season 5 · Episode 3 · Quote 23630

25. Nobody steals from Creed Bratton and gets away with it. The last person to do this disappeared. His name? Creed Bratton.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 23881

26. Yeah, that's all-inclusive.

    Season 5 · Episode 4 · Quote 23918

27. Let's put a smile on that face!

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24082

28. It's pronounced Ker-nell. It's the highest rank in the military.

    Season 5 · Episode 5 · Quote 24204

29. One more week.

    Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24936

30. Cool beans, man, I live by the quarry. We should hang out by the quarry and throw things down there.

    Season 5 · Episode 8 · Quote 25317

31. Just pretend like we're talking until the cops leave.

    Season 5 · Episode 8 · Quote 25453

32. The balls on you, man.

    Season 5 · Episode 9 · Quote 25593

33. I can get you one in an hour.

    Season 5 · Episode 10 · Quote 26006

34. You are welcome.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26289

35. Yeah.

    Season 5 · Episode 11 · Quote 26364

36. Ah, Hillary Swank.

    Season 5 · Episode 12 · Quote 26429

37. You were in the parking lot earlier. That's how I know you.

    Season 5 · Episode 13 · Quote 26841

38. He has no wallet, I checked.

    Season 5 · Episode 13 · Quote 26855

39. Give it up, he's dead.

    Season 5 · Episode 13 · Quote 27049

40. What's a text?

    Season 5 · Episode 13 · Quote 27051

41. This gal, she's really into you?

    Season 5 · Episode 14 · Quote 27258

42. All right, all right. Say no more. So, this is how I got squeaky fromme. No small talk. Just show her who's the boss. Just go right in and kiss her.

    Season 5 · Episode 14 · Quote 27260

43. Have I ever steered you wrong, Jim?

    Season 5 · Episode 14 · Quote 27262

44. I'd like to contribute.

    Season 5 · Episode 14 · Quote 27310

45. There you go.

    Season 5 · Episode 14 · Quote 27312

46. For a cat? I could get you a kid for that.

    Season 5 · Episode 15 · Quote 27331

47. Bonnie Hunt is on.

    Season 5 · Episode 15 · Quote 27546

48. That's not why.

    Season 5 · Episode 17 · Quote 27991

49. Good work, kid.

    Season 5 · Episode 17 · Quote 28102

50. The real question here is who's this guy work for?

    Season 5 · Episode 18 · Quote 28473

51. Ah, it's all starting to make sense now.

    Season 5 · Episode 18 · Quote 28475

52. I think it's 75 cents.

    Season 5 · Episode 19 · Quote 28548

53. Oh, he does. He does.

    Season 5 · Episode 20 · Quote 28815

54. These are terrible boss. You gotta make them in a circle so that they cook evenly.

    Season 5 · Episode 21 · Quote 29257

55. Well I don't even want these.

    Season 5 · Episode 21 · Quote 29259

56. It's crazy what's going on out there today, huh?

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Quote 30009

57. Sometimes it's best just to say out of it.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Quote 30011

58. Want to play a game?

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Quote 30013

59. No. IF you do that, I'm gonna do that. IF you do that, I'm gonna do that. IF you do this, I'm gonna do that.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Quote 30042

60. You don't want to do that.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Quote 30044

61. So hey, I'm want to set you up with my daughter.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Quote 30121

62. I thought you were gay.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Quote 30123

63. I don't know.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Quote 30125

64. Challenge.

    Season 5 · Episode 24 · Quote 30129

65. I hear it, too, Boss.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Quote 30410

66. Boss, this used to hang from my windshield but it belongs in here.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Quote 30429

67. No problem. I'll just have no idea who's driving behind me now.

    Season 5 · Episode 25 · Quote 30431

68. Hey, did one of you tell Stanley I have asthma? Because I don't, and if it gets out, they won't let me scuba.

    Season 6 · Episode 1 · Quote 31013

69. If I can't scuba, then what's this all been about? What am I working toward?

    Season 6 · Episode 1 · Quote 31014

70. I heard that from... Andy.

    Season 6 · Episode 1 · Quote 31024

71. Come on, boss.

    Season 6 · Episode 1 · Quote 31038

72. How far along?

    Season 6 · Episode 1 · Quote 31066

73. Who's the OB/GYN?

    Season 6 · Episode 1 · Quote 31068

74. They've been in there a while.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31186

75. Can't be good.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31188

76. Think they're talking about me?

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31190

77. Yeah, that makes way more sense. Okay thanks boss.

    Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31192

78. Hey, why haven't we ever, um...

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31513

79. Yes.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31587

80. Yep.

    Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31619

81. Uh, small things. Peas, ball bearings, dimes...

    Season 6 · Episode 5 · Quote 32250

82. She's messed up man...

    Season 6 · Episode 6 · Quote 32788

83. I want to sell your blood!

    Season 6 · Episode 7 · Quote 32916

84. Hey, boss, did you find Nemo?

    Season 6 · Episode 7 · Quote 33050

85. Oh, you're payin' way too much for your worms, man. Who's your worm guy?

    Season 6 · Episode 7 · Quote 33115

86. Thank God.

    Season 6 · Episode 8 · Quote 33289

87. Something's up. That paper was never supposed to arrive.

    Season 6 · Episode 8 · Quote 33290

88. Sorry I'm late, boss. What's going on?

    Season 6 · Episode 9 · Quote 33717

89. OK. Hang on just a second. Let me just settle in and I'll be right back.

    Season 6 · Episode 9 · Quote 33719

90. I don't know, man. I just don't know.

    Season 6 · Episode 10 · Quote 34017

91. Guys, I'm starting to think Pam's not really even pregnant.

    Season 6 · Episode 11 · Quote 34281

92. What if you've been bad?

    Season 6 · Episode 12 · Quote 34420

93. What if you've been really, really bad? More evil, and strictly wrong?

    Season 6 · Episode 12 · Quote 34422

94. Have you tried making everything smaller?

    Season 6 · Episode 14 · Quote 34860

95. Have fun!

    Season 6 · Episode 16 · Quote 35634

96. Oh, come on!

    Season 6 · Episode 19 · Quote 36597

97. You ever notice you can ooze two things: sexuality and pus. Man, I tell ya.

    Season 6 · Episode 21 · Quote 37336

98. Psst...

    Season 6 · Episode 22 · Quote 37737

99. So there I am, minding my own business and Darnell offers me three bucks. All I gotta do is walk by Andy and go like this. Darnell's a chump. I would have done it for anything. I've done a lot more for a lot less.

    Season 6 · Episode 22 · Quote 37739

100. Curve the bullet. Like in my favorite James McAvoy film, Wanted.

     Season 6 · Episode 23 · Quote 37860