Every quote from The Office season 9, episode 6, in script order. First aired November 8, 2012.
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Dwight
Yes..?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54271
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Nellie
I'm so sorry we're going to have to ask you to remove the shirt all together.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54272
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Dwight
Now then, we were saying. When my workers-gather-
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54273
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Nellie
Oh, I'm so sorry. I am told we are still having problems Mr. Shrute. Your voice, it's sounding a little feminine.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54274
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Dwight
That's impossible.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54275
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Nellie
Are you by any chance wearing pants with a metallic zipper?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54276
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Angela
The Senator is exhausted. This campaign is wearing him out.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54277
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Oscar
That's a tough one.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54278
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Angela
That man he's up against is so dirty. And the senator's just pushing back as hard as he can.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54279
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Kevin
Please, stop.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54280
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Angela
What?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54281
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Kevin
Please, stop.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54282
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Angela
Anyways, last night he was tired and just wanted a little Mexican brought in.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54283
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Kevin
I can't, it's too much!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54284
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Oscar
I'm in big trouble.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54285
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Kevin
Yeah, Oscar's in big trouble.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54286
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Dwight
OK, how is my voice now?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54287
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Nellie
I'm getting the all clear from Steve, so Mr. Shrute, what is your response to the consumer product safety commission that says Dunder Mifflin paper is toxic?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54288
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Dwight
This is gotcha journalism. You know what? They're not gonna gotch me.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54289
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Oscar
[looking at folder he brought Toby]It's clearly not an accounting mistake.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54290
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Toby
Yeah.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54291
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Oscar
So...
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54292
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Toby
Kevin. His gambling problem must've resurfaced. I'm gonna have to send him home until I can do an investigation.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54293
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Oscar
Well, you've gotta do what you've gotta do.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54294
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Dwight
This is slander, Ms. Black. Slander I say! I dare you to produce one credible source about this.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54295
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Nellie
Well, as it happens we have with us the foreman of your upstate New York paper mill, Sandra Mc...Sandra Mick
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54296
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Pam
Good afternoon Iris, it's a pleasure.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54297
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Nellie
Let's get straight to the point. Is your paper toxic?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54298
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Pam
No the paper's not toxic.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54299
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Dwight
Thank you Sandra!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54300
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Pam
Unless it's exposed to oxygen. Then it becomes extremely toxic!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54301
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Dwight
Do not listen to her! This employee is obviously disgruntled!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54302
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Jim
What the heck is going on?! The stock prices are plummeting! Are you gonna take control of the message or do I have to send in someone who understands the media?!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54303
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Dwight
Get out of here moron!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54304
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Nellie
Excuse me, Mr. Dwight, who are you talking to?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54305
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Dwight
uhhhh....no one.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54306
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Nellie
Did you just call Ms. Mick a moron?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54307
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Dwight
No, everything's fine.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54308
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Nellie
Are you insulting my guests?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54309
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Dwight
[chokes up]
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54310
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Kevin
Yeah, I will be right there. Hey Oscar, what if I'm getting a promotion?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54311
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Oscar
I hope that's it, Kevin.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54312
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Kevin
Me too. Cause then, I would get my own office. And I wouldn't screw up your secret with Angela. I've been really worried about that.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54313
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Toby
Hi, Kevin. Look, I need to talk to you about-
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54314
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Kevin
Hi.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54315
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Oscar
Guys? Excuse me. Um, a quick word, please just..
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54316
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Kevin
Oscar, we're in the middle of talking.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54317
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Oscar
Oh, you're right I'm so sorry. Snack machine on me.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54318
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Kevin
Oh that is nice. Classy move.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54319
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Dwight
That's what I'm saying! No of course not!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54320
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Kevin
What are you doing?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54321
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Oscar
Those figures I gave you? They're false.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54322
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Toby
How?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54323
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Oscar
I was mad at Kevin, we had a fight and I acted vindictively.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54324
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Toby
So you set him up.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54325
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Oscar
Yes, he's innocent.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54326
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Toby
I knew it. I knew it from the beginning it was possible.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54327
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Oscar
What are you talking about? I just did this now.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54328
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Toby
A few years ago, when I was on the jury of the Scranton Strangler..
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54329
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Oscar
Sure.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54330
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Toby
I always thought he might have been set up but I felt pressured to convict.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54331
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Oscar
That's gotta be tough.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54332
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Toby
Tough? I put an innocent man on death row.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54333
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Nellie
The fallout from this morning's revelation continues to mount, since Mr. Dwight Shrute began speaking, Dunder Mifflin share prices fell 73%. Mr. Shrute, shareholders demand accountability from corporate leadership. Can we announce your resignation at this time?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54334
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Dwight
My resignation? What are you talking about? No! I was just following orders! Listen, the person responsible for this catastrophe is the CEO and chairman, David Wallace!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54335
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Erin
That's yours?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54336
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Andy
That's the family boat!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54337
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Erin
Oh my gosh, Andy! This is enormous!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54338
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Andy
Right?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54339
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Erin
I thought it was gonna be tiny. Oh my gosh it's beautiful. So this is how your family came to America.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54340
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Boat Guy
Move.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54341
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Andy
Sorry?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54342
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Boat Guy
Trying to rig a boat here. I don't know how to do that when you're standing in the way.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54343
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Andy
Sure, I um..I didn't know.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54344
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Boat Guy
I'm not a ghost, so I can't walk through people.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54345
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Andy
Ok.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54346
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Erin
Gee, he was salty.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54347
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Andy
Geez, a little bit. How you doing old buddy? Missed you.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54348
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Erin
What does that one do?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54349
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Andy
It raises the main sail. That was my job when we went sailing.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54350
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Erin
I wish I had seen you do it.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54351
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Andy
Really?
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54352
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Erin
Yeah.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54353
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Andy
Up she goes!
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54354
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Boat Guy
Don't do that. Don't do that.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54355
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Andy
Oh, it's OK. My girlfriend and I were actually gonna take her for a little spin and a picnic before you guys head out tonight. You know what? Get some dinner on me.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54356
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Boat Guy
Nope. Can't do that.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54357
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Andy
You got it. You know what then, we'll just take it for a quick little spin around the harbor.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54358
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Boat Guy
We've already started boarding. And no one is insured to rig her up right now except us.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54359
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Andy
You know what? Chill, ok? I own the boat. Not gonna sue myself. Alright, so just- wow.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54360
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Boat Guy
I can smack you all day if you keep touching what you're not supposed to touch.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54361
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Andy
Ok, fine.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54362
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Boat Guy
OK.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54363
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Andy
Yeah, fine.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54364
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Boat Guy
Good stuff.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54365
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Andy
Good stuff. Nice stuff. Damn it! Screw you dad! ..ah.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54366
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Erin
Well, we're doing it. We're finally having a picnic on the boat.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54367
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Andy
I've had a thousand picnics on this boat. The point was for me to sail it.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54368
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Erin
Andy, you never had to sail the boat to be a man.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54369
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Andy
Fine. But I could have.
Season 9 · Episode 6 · Quote 54370