Every line from The Office season 8, episode 24, in script order. First aired May 10, 2012.
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Jim
This is great.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52604
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Pam
You ready?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52605
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Jim
Excuse me.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52606
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Pam
There we go.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52607
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Jim
Just do it.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52608
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Pam
I'll just stand here?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52609
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Jim
Yeah, just keep your eye on Dwight, great.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52610
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Photographer
Sir, could you look into the camera?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52611
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Jim
Let's do it, shoot it.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52612
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Photographer
Sir.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52613
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Jim
Great.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52614
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Dwight
Up here.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52615
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Jim
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52616
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Dwight
Jim, right here, right here. Okay, good.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52617
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Jim
Oh, so that's it?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52618
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Dwight
That's it.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52619
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Pam
See? That wasn't so hard.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52620
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Dwight
Cute kids, thanks for coming.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52621
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Senator Lipton
Hello, Erin. Hello, everybody.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52622
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Angela
Uh, what? Why? Uh, hi honey. What- how are you doing?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52623
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Senator Lipton
Hi, you know, my office got a call that they were shooting family portraits right here. And if there's one thing that every politician instinctively understands, it's a good photo op.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52624
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Phyllis
Yeah.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52625
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Angela
Heh.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52626
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Erin
Okay, you're going to go through the hallway. Here's a map. And if you get lost, just follow the blue line.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52627
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Senator Lipton
Thanks.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52628
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Dwight
Well, well, well. Senator Lipton, welcome. Angela.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52629
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Angela
Dwight.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52630
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Dwight
Nice to see you. May I hold him?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52631
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Senator Lipton
Sure.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52632
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Angela
No. I am going to hold him because I haven't seen him all day.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52633
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Angela
I think that Dwight is doing this whole thing to, um, get a sample of my baby's DNA to prove he's the father. Which... is impossible... because the senator is the only man I've ever been with.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52634
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Angela
See the duckie!
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52635
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Dwight
Okay, hold on for a second, folks. A few of the baby's hairs are out of place.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52636
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Senator Lipton
Oh, thank you.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52637
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Angela
No. No. I like the baby's hair the way it is.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52638
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Dwight
Really?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52639
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Andy
This is getting more and more delicious by the minute. It's go time.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52640
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Andy
Hey Nellie, I made soup - I made you some soup.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52641
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Nellie
Well, I don't want any soup.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52642
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Andy
But it's really good- Oh!
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52643
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Nellie
Oh come on, Andy!
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52644
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Erin
I know this is going to be a great payoff.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52645
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Andy
A delicious moment.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52646
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Erin
But after you're manager, some of these images are going to be hard to shake.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52647
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Andy
Well, but it-
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52648
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Erin
Just calibrate. Okay? Calibrate.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52649
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Dwight
Okay, here we go. Oh, you know what? I don't want to throw a wrench in the works, but I want everything to be perfect and the baby's fingernails are just bothering me-
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52650
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Angela
Uh-uh, leave us alone.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52651
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Senator Lipton
I guess we're okay with the fingernails.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52652
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Dwight
Okay, great. Suit yourself. Although, are those excess skin cells on the baby's cheek distracting to you as well?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52653
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Angela
Dwight, we're fine!
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52654
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Senator Lipton
Oopsie, did somebody make a boopsie?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52655
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Angela
Oh no.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52656
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Senator Lipton
I'm just gonna take him out and change him just for a second.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52657
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Dwight
He defecated, aw.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52658
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Senator Lipton
You're stinky.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52659
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Darryl
A lot has changed since y'all left, okay? You're gonna have to jump through some hoops. And the new foreman is here. Now she's one of the best we've ever known, okay? So I need you to show her your upmost respect. Make sure she feels welcome and at home, okay? Can you do that?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52660
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Brandon
That's some pretty blatant complementing you're doing there, man. I don't even talk to her like that.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52661
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Val
Uh, Brandon?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52662
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Darryl
I would.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52663
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Brandon
You would?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52664
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Darryl
Yeah.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52665
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Brandon
Sounds like you're trying to hit on my girlfriend.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52666
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Val
Calm down, he's not.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52667
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Darryl
Yes, I am. Just so everyone's on the same page.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52668
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Brandon
So you really think she's gonna leave a guy who owns his own restaurant for a dude who ate his own restaurant?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52669
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Val
Brandon!
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52670
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Darryl
Good slam.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52671
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Brandon
Thank you, Biggie.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52672
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Darryl
Good luck to you.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52673
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Brandon
Oh, and have a burger for me.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52674
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Senator Lipton
Okay, shall we take a few more?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52675
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Angela
I think we have all the shots we need. Thank you, Dwight.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52676
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Senator Lipton
Okay. There we go.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52677
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Angela
No! Dwight! Give me the diaper! Dwight!
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52678
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Dwight
Is this what you were looking for? Huh? Huh?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52679
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Toby
Andy, we wanted to talk to you. A lot of us are very concerned about you.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52680
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Nellie
You're dirty, you stink of booze, you're limping inexplicably.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52681
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Andy
I just want you guys not to worry. 'Cause old Andy's gonna be just fine.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52682
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Jim
No, no, see? This is what we're talking about. I mean, what was that accent? And last time I checked, you were drunk and now you're not drunk...
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52683
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Erin
No, unfortunately it's true. He's been a nightmare. And the worst part is, he's been taking it out on me.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52684
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Nellie
What?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52685
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Pam
You hit her?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52686
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Andy
No. That is not the deal. Calibrate.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52687
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Erin
He's not hitting me. But, he's been verbally abusing me-
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52688
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Andy
That's not true either! That's also total- Everyone, please relax. I think you're gonna like this surprise guest.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52689
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Gabe
Happy birthday to Gabe!
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52690
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Nellie
Oh, get out, skeleton man!
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52691
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Toby
I can refer you to someone to talk to.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52692
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Andy
Huh? Hold on.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52693
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Toby
Give you a name or-
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52694
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Andy
I just gonna- quick- Hello? Hey, what's the scoop? Are you close? What? No. no, no, no, no, no. You have to come now. Traffic clears? No, next Friday... that's not gonna work. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Damn it! Well, this is not going to be quite as delicious as I wanted, but I do have a very tasty announcement for you guys. Not only am I not a lowly janitor, I am the regional manager once again! Guys, I got my old job back!
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52695
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Jim
Oh boy.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52696
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Pam
Oh, Andy.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52697
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Oscar
What?
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52698
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Andy
I'm not crazy. I convinced David Wallace to give me my job back.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52699
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Oscar
David Wallace hasn't worked here in years.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52700
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Andy
Okay, yes, I see the confusion. I saw David at the fundraiser. He is now a multi-millionaire because he sold his toy vacuum 'Suck It' to the U.S. military.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52701
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Jim
Andy, come on.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52702
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Kevin
Even I know that's weird.
Season 8 · Episode 24 · Line 52703