"Test the Store" Quotes (page 3)

Every line from The Office season 8, episode 17, in script order. First aired March 1, 2012.

259 quotes · page 3 of 3

Nellie

What?

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50794
Dwight

That's right. Will you just give us a second?

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50795
Nellie

You are gonna bloody ruin it. You're gonna bloody ruin it because you're a no-good half-assed cock-eyed...

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50796
Jim

okay.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50797
Nellie

That's....

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50798
Dwight

Jim --

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50799
Jim

I'm not doing the Presentation.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50800
Dwight

Look at me. Look at me! Look... at... this... face. This is not the face of a performer. This is the face of a scary apparition you see before you die. I'm telling you... if you don't do this, I don't stand a chance. Please, Jim.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50801
Jim

Okay, I'll do it.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50802
Dwight

Oh, my God. O... Kay! Go get into Ryan's costume and check out his notes.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50803
Jim

A costume?

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50804
Dwight

Of course there's a costume! Oh, this is gonna be great. There's nothing like some last-minutes changes to really energize a presentation.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50805
Dwight

Did you pass out in there? What is taking so long?

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50806
Jim

I've been in here for 20 seconds.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50807
Dwight

Hurry up. Let me in. I wanna watch you get dressed. Did you find the eyeliner?

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50808
Jim

I'm not wearing eyeliner.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50809
Dwight

You are wearing eyeliner, Jim.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50810
Jim

Time. Space. Gender. There are no rules anymore. All boundaries are breaking down in the wake of the infinite future. The only thing that -- the only thing that remain -- the only thing that remains are the things that have stood the test of time -- love, values, and of course, the pyramids -- the strongest shape ever constructed, a shape that fits all other shapes inside of it. No, that's --

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50811
Dwight

It's true.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50812
Jim

This... is the future, because... This is the past. I've been through a lot of issues in my life. I've seen drug addiction -- unemployment. I've been in a relationship that tore my heart apart, without ever being able to accept that love drove the pain.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50813
Dwight

Yep.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50814
Jim

When I was ten years old, my parents took me to Disney world. I cried the whole time. I was not able to comprehend the beauty that was before me. I just wanted... to go home. This is what the Pyramid will do for you. It is the bridge to the world. It has a usb port. Wireless... will be available in 2013. You can play Anything from Chuck to Cars 2. With the Pyramid, you have the connection to everything -- in time... and space.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50815
Crowd

ahhhhhh

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50816
Dwight

Psst.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50817
Jim

Oh.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50818
Ryan

Sabre... It's time... to come home.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50819
Crowd

[applause]

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50820
Jim

All right. Thank you so much. Wow. Wow! And good night!

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50821
Jim

Yeah. Thank you. Thank you.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50822
Toby

Okay, this isn't over. Let's stay focused, okay? We made fun of Andy earlier for getting beat up by a little girl, but... little things can be dangerous.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50823
Kevin

Whether it's a gremlin or chucky the doll. The key is to throw it in something. Like a fireplace, or a tub of electricity.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50824
Toby

Okay. Good point...

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50825
Angela

Good point? What is a tub of electricity?

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50826
Toby

I don't... I don't...

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50827
Oscar

With all due respect we know what we're defending against: a twelve year old female bully.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50828
Kelly

I was a twelve year old bully.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50829
Angela

Great! I think Kelly should attack Toby.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50830
Others

Yeah.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50831
Kelly

Yeah, that's not a bad idea, actually, because I have had a lot of pent up aggression.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50832
Angela

Thanks.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50833
Kelly

Good. Let's go.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50834
Toby

I don't know if this is gonna help...Uh...

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50835
Angela

Let's go Kelly.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50836
Toby

We should stay to maybe some more traditional models...

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50837
Kelly

You think you're so pretty! Well you're not gonna be so pretty come Prom time!

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50838
Toby

Okay, this is what's called pre-violent posturing.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50839
Kelly

Take that! Not so pre-violent anymore!

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50840
Toby

Okay, I'm at what's called 'the decision point.'

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50841
Andy

Hey, hey, hey. Kelly Kelly, Kelly... come on.... Ow! God! My good eye!

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50842
Pam

Oh boy. Oh no, I'm not laughing at you. I'm laughing at, um, something that Cece did on the playground earlier -- yesterday. This morning.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50843
Andy

You know why I got hit by girls? Because I stood up for others. Pam and for Toby. I stepped in and I didn't care that I was standing up to girls. You may wanna ask yourselves, 'Where were you when the girls came?'

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50844
Andy

Tough day. Yes. But I feel good. I put the office in their place, took a bunch of pain killers, drank a half a bottle of wine, took my pants off. I just feel good!

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50845
Dwight

Okay, okay, I will be the first to admit it. We could have integrated more Chuck into the Presentation.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50846
Nellie

Dwight. You're the vice president.

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50847
Dwight

Ha, ha, ha, ha! Yeah!

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50848
Nellie

[squealing]

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50849
Dwight

Okay! Come on!

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50850
Nellie

aagh!

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50851
Dwight

Hah! Yah! Boom!

Season 8 · Episode 17 · Line 50852