Every line from The Office season 8, episode 12, in script order. First aired January 19, 2012.
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Val
No, I'm good. Thank you.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49232
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Darryl
Cool.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49233
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Val
Cool. Does Darryl not swim?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49234
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Kevin
That's racist! I don't know. But I would say, by looking at him, no, Darryl does not swim.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49235
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Jessica
Yes!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49236
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Andy
Yeah!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49237
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Dwight
Maybe we should take a little break.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49238
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Erin
Dwight, we've got this. I promise. I will not leave your shoulders, no matter what.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49239
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Dwight
Okay.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49240
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Erin
One more?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49241
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Andy
Yeah!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49242
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Jessica
Yeah! Great!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49243
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Erin
Mush, mush, mush! Come on!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49244
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Dwight
Go!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49245
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Erin
Go! Okay. Yeah.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49246
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Jessica
Here we go! Yes!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49247
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Andy
Yay! Whoa!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49248
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Kevin
Wow!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49249
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Andy
I cannot believe you're still up!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49250
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Jessica
I cannot believe it either.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49251
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Erin
I've got this! Charge! Go! Go!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49252
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Andy
Dwight are you okay? Hey, damn it-
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49253
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Dwight
Erin, did we win?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49254
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Erin
Sure. Sure we did.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49255
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Dwight
You're lying. We didn't win.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49256
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Erin
Hey, hey, hey Dwight. It's okay. Just rest. Just rest.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49257
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Kelly
You've broken up your last couple, you evil ring. Do it.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49258
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Angela
We're in the pool!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49259
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Meredith
Shut it, Angela.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49260
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Dwight
Ugh. Same old party, same old people. Am I right? Reminds me of Phyllis's birthday.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49261
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Andy
Ooh, do not remind me of Phyllis's birthday.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49262
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Dwight
I know. But boy, that Erin. She sure is a ripe little tiger, isn't she? Rroww! And to think, I always thought of her as a second Meredith. Respectfully, I don't want us walking into a similar Angela kind of situation.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49263
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Andy
Mmm.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49264
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Dwight
So I just want to make sure that you are completely, one hundred percent done with Erin.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49265
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Andy
Last I checked, I'm with Jessica. And I like to get my monog on. It's monogamy for my hog 'n me.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49266
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Dwight
Not what I asked.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49267
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Andy
We're done. Erin and I are over.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49268
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Dwight
So then you won't mind if tonight I just go crazy on her, just go nuts, rrargh. With sex.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49269
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Andy
Have at it. Or take it slow. Whatever you guys work out.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49270
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Dwight
You're an idiot.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49271
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Kevin
Kelly, that is mine! This is mine!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49272
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Erin
Uh-uh. Uh-uh.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49273
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Kevin
No!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49274
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Val
Oh I've got him!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49275
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Darryl
Cannonball! Let's do this!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49276
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Andy
Wow.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49277
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Erin
So I kind of stepped on this. I think it's yours.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49278
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Andy
Yeah. Oh wow. How did you know it was mine?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49279
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Erin
The Bernard family seal. Duh.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49280
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Andy
Duh.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49281
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Erin
Sorry if your special night was ruined.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49282
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Andy
Oh, whoa. Whoa, no, it's not a special night.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49283
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Erin
Oh, you weren't going to do that?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49284
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Andy
Honestly Erin, I don't know what I'm doing. I... I just... I don't know. Thank you.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49285
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Erin
Andy's confused. That's not what I was hoping for, but it's not so bad either. I can live with confused. I get confused. I totally get confused.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49286
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Robert
And of course, the pool. The ultimate lubricant for any wild evening. It was here that my parties would have crescendoed into true madness.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49287
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Jim
To madness.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49288
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Ryan
To madness.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49289
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Toby
To madness.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49290
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Meredith
To madness.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49291
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Jim
Hey, um, I think you parked my car in. Is there any way you can move your van?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49292
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Meredith
Oh, I'm sorry. When I got here, I put my keys in a bowl.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49293
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Jim
Are you serious?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49294
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Ryan
Robert, I want you to know, I'm here to rock with you as late as you want, man.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49295
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Gabe
And that goes double for me. I'll stay even later than you'd like.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49296
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Oscar
Toby! I am Bacchus, god of wine!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49297
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Toby
And I am Bacchus's friend!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49298
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Robert
Gentlemen, bear witness. While I've been mourning the nights that never were, one of them has been unfolding here before me. This is no get-together. This is a party.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49299
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All
Yes! Woohoo! Bravo!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49300
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Jim
And there's my talking point.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49301
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Robert
Yes, that's it. Push yourselves, boys. It's not a party if you don't do something that scares you. I need a breather. Oh. Oh. You two keep going.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49302
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Ryan
Hey, he's asleep. We can just leave.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49303
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Gabe
So leave.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49304
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Ryan
Two pools. A divider. A bridge. Good choice. It says everything about everything, right Robert?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49305
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Kathy
What's the water like?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49306
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Darryl
Nice.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49307
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Angela
Oh, it is warm.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49308
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Phyllis
Robert's house is, well....I don't mean to sound offensive, but it's like where a basketball player would live.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49309
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Erin
Oh, Dwight.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49310
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Dwight
Uh huh.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49311
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Erin
That feels so good!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49312
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Dwight
Yeah....baby.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49313
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Erin
Hey, Andy.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49314
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Andy
Hey.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49315
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Erin
Dwight gives the best back massages.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49316
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Andy
Yeah, it sounds like it.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49317
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Dwight
Hey, have you ever been checked for scoliosis?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49318
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Erin
I don't know, why don't you check me Dr. Shrute.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49319
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Dwight
No, seriously. Your spine is jacked. It's like the devil's cursive.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49320
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Erin
You mean more like dangerous curves...
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49321
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Dwight
You'd be like 8 feet tall if this thing was straightened out...[pushes Erin back to floor]
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49322
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Erin
Ow!
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49323
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Erin
You date a guy, you find out he was engaged to your coworker so you throw cake at him. It's over. You start liking him again so you ask him out with a puppet show. He says no. Then he follows you home to make sure that you don't kiss somebody. Then he ignores you at a pool party? Am I right ladies?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49324
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Dwight
Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oooooh, yeah.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49325
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Jessica
You guys ready?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49326
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Andy
Bring it on guys.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49327
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Dwight
Yeah...
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49328
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Andy
Let's go before I vomit.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49329
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Dwight
Ready?
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49330
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Erin
I'm ready.
Season 8 · Episode 12 · Line 49331