Every line from The Office season 7, episode 8, in script order. First aired November 11, 2010.
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Ryan
What is this, Samurai wood cuts? Yep. Pretty erotic.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40532
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Andy
Yeah.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40533
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Michael
Better men than Gabe have tried to be my boss. David got fired. Charles got fired. Jan went crazy. Ed Truck, who I liked, got decapitated.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40534
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Dwight
Michael, I find it absolutely disgraceful that no one followed you in here for your walk-out. I took the liberty of making a list of everyone who didn't follow you in here. Jim. Oscar. Creed. Me, at first.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40535
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Pam
Maybe I should go.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40536
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Dwight
Kelly. Kev- Are you gonna quiet that baby? Or do I have to? In the Schrute family, the youngest child always raises the others. I've been raising children since I was a baby.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40537
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Darryl
Take a shot.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40538
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Andy
Oh thanks.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40539
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Darryl
Wow, so much Asia stuff. I wonder if there's a guy in China right now, looking at a bunch of our stuff.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40540
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Andy
Why does Erin like Gabe?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40541
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Darryl
Andy look, all I know is that if I was a girl, and I had to choose between the tall dude who loved Asia, and the you looking dude who loves sweaters and wearing sweaters... I'd choose you.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40542
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Andy
That's really nice, thank you.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40543
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Darryl
And I'd blow your mind.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40544
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Andy
[pours powdered seahorse into his wine glass]
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40545
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Jim
[changes channel during commercial, sports scores appear on screen.]
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40546
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Oscar
Jim what are you doing?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40547
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Jim
Oh, it was commercial break so I just wanted to check the scores.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40548
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Oscar
Flip it back please.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40549
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Jim
Okay...
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40550
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Kelly
The show's back on, what happened?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40551
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Ryan
We're behind.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40552
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Oscar
Go to the recorded version.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40553
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Kelly
Oh my God what song was that?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40554
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Erin
I wasn't recording it.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40555
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Oscar
What?!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40556
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Kelly
What song was it?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40557
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Erin
Wait, why do you have to record it?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40558
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Oscar
This is why Erin! We're living it! Start recording now!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40559
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Erin
Jim.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40560
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Kelly
Okay, they did Blinded by the Light and they did it with an actual blind guy. Was it worth it Jim? 'Cause we missed it!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40561
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Pam
If I could get her sleeping normally I could get my life back.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40562
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Dwight
That would be nice wouldn't it?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40563
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Pam
I can't even talk about it.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40564
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Dwight
You know it's not really necessary for me to sit here holding her all night. Just go into Gabe's refrigerator, get a lump of suit, or any kind of congealed animal fat will do rally, tie a piece of string to it and the other end to her toe, put the suit in her mouth, she'll be happy for hours.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40565
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Pam
I kind of doubt Gabe has suit.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40566
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Dwight
Really? Oh... Then here we are.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40567
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Erin
Michael. Gabe is making the pigs in a blanket, and he kind of needs some help so, he was wondering if you could help him.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40568
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Andy
Ladies and gentlemen please welcome, Phyllis Vance! Isn't that White Diamonds Maya Smith Taylor?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40569
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Phyllis
You know your perfumes!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40570
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Andy
My nanny used to wear that.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40571
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Andy
I just ate powdered seahorse! I have to admit I did not think it was gonna work, but it is totally working! I feel exactly like a seahorse! Blub blub blub blub blub blub blub blub.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40572
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Erin
Look who I found!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40573
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Michael
Yeah, well I wasn't very hard to find.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40574
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Gabe
Let's go ahead and wash our hands.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40575
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Michael
Is this the same dough you used for the pizza crust?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40576
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Gabe
Yep! Waste not right?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40577
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Michael
So these are pizza dogs, they aren't pigs in a blanket per se.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40578
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Erin
Michael knows everything there is to know about snacks,
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40579
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Michael
Well...
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40580
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Erin
Gabe was born in 1982. He was the longest baby in the hospital.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40581
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Michael
He's the longest baby in this room.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40582
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Erin
What's the longest thing you've ever seen? For me it was the tale from Jets.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40583
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Gabe
Erin you don't have to...
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40584
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Michael
You know what Erin you do have to.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40585
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Gabe
Michael! You are making this harder than it has to be.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40586
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Michael
That's what she said.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40587
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Jim
Hey.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40588
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Pam
It's a miracle. She loves him.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40589
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Jim
I don't know about, love...
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40590
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Dwight
She loves me.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40591
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Angela
Outside my car in two minutes.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40592
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Dwight
Well something's come up, I have to go.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40593
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Pam
No no no no no! She'll wake up!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40594
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Dwight
I have something to do.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40595
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Pam
Look, I know what you have to do, please stay with Cece. Dwight? I've always considered for us to be very good friends. Great friends! Remember your concussion?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40596
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Dwight
I do. But you married my worst enemy.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40597
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Jim
Well I think enemy's a strong word. 'Cause I think we have a really charming back and forth. And-
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40598
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Dwight
Enough. I will require beer and pizza to think this over.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40599
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Pam
Absolutely!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40600
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Dwight
From Jim.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40601
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Jim
I don't think that's gonna...
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40602
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Pam
Do it!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40603
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Jim
What kind of pizza would you like?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40604
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Dwight
Surprise me. No! Pepperoni.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40605
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Michael
Okay... Alright.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40606
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TV
And the winner is, by two votes-
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40607
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Kelly
Ahhh! What's going on?!?!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40608
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Andy
Hey Creed, would you read Chinese?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40609
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Creed
Beleniege!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40610
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Andy
What does this say?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40611
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Creed
HI mahhhh. Boo yowww. Gunjo! Ooh uncow!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40612
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Andy
Hello UPS! Still waiting on that five minutes with Erin order. Oh never mind it's here. Oh if it isn't the bell of the ball! You throw a lovely party ma lady...
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40613
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Erin
Are you having a good time?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40614
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Andy
Did you wear my favorite outfit on purpose?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40615
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Erin
Andy you look awful!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40616
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Andy
You're four seasons in a day. You... got the Autumn thing going on. But if you put on ba- Put if you put on a blue... It's Spring Time in the Rockies!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40617
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Erin
Are you alright?
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40618
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Andy
No!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40619
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Dwight
Insert it in my mouth.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40620
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Jim
That's not gonna make your pizza eating experience any better. Trust me.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40621
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Dwight
No, try me.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40622
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Pam
Jim, just don't think of it as degrading. Think of it as, you happen to be moving the six inches his way and he happens to be biting it.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40623
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Dwight
I'd prefer for him to think of it as degrading.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40624
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Jim
Okay...
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40625
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Dwight
No. Crust first. Okay, now the beer. Beer me Jim. Ssss. Gentle. Now I've gotta go meet Angela.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40626
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Pam
What no, wait! You said you were gonna help us!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40627
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Dwight
I have a legal obligation to Angela. Okay, she needs to be serviced.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40628
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Jim
You need to stop talking.
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40629
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Dwight
Oh come on, stop the fake prissy act. We're in the real world. Sex contracts exist!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40630
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Pam
Okay fine! There must be some way to get out of it. Even just for tonight!
Season 7 · Episode 8 · Line 40631