Jim

Get in the car?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44209

Erin

Please! Sorry. Get in. Sorry sorry sorry.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44210

Pam

What's wrong?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44211

Erin

I eat lunch in the car now. It's my alone time. It's just nice to have some time away from Gabe.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44212

Pam

Why don't you wanna eat lunch with your boyfriend?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44213

Erin

I, really don't like spending time with him.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44214

Pam

Don't you think it's better to tell him the truth now? You know, rather than waste more of his time?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44215

Jim

I think I'm gonna go.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44216

Pam

What?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44217

Jim

I think you got this. Kay? Alright. Feel better!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44218

Erin

Thank you Jim.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44219

Jim

I'm sorry, that just wasn't interesting to me.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44220

Erin

I can't just dump him Pam, I'm not like you, I can't be mean.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44221

Pam

Wait, when am I...? You just have to be clear and firm. You know, just tell him you don't love him. Just be honest with him.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44222

Dwight

[standing by the Louie Volpies entrance greeting people and giving them menus]

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44223

Kevin

Hi!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44224

Dwight

Appalling. Eye sore. Surprisingly adequate! Okay everyone! The activities commence in four seconds!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44225

Erin

Deangelo, Jo's on the phone for you.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44226

Deangelo Vickers

Hello?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44227

Michael

Deangelo! We're in serious horse manure here! The Dundies are tonight! And we ain't got no host!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44228

Deangelo Vickers

Oh no!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44229

Michael

Luckily I have someone for you!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44230

Deangelo Vickers

Billy Crystal?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44231

Michael

Better.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44232

Deangelo Vickers

Neil Patrick Harris?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44233

Michael

He's in Little Shop of Horrors on Broadway. Now we need Michael Scott! The best darn Dundies host on both sides of the Mississippi!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44234

Deangelo Vickers

Ughhh, I gotta find Michael Scott! And then I gotta, Get him to the Dundies!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44235

Deangelo Vickers

Hey, can you help me find Michael Scott, Angela?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44236

Michael

My boyfriend can, he's a state senator.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44237

Audience

[laughing]

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44238

Deangelo Vickers

Mmhmm.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44239

Michael

Oh wait, he can't help because that title has no meaning!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44240

Oscar

[laughing]

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44241

Oscar

Try Jim, Deangelo. He'll be able to help.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44242

Deangelo Vickers

Jim! Do you know where I can find Michael Scott?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44243

Michael

I totally don't know where Michael is, dude. Hey, you wanna listen to some records?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44244

Jim

[shaking head at the camera]

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44245

Deangelo Vickers

No one is listening to me! And I'm running out of time!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44246

Michael

Well, what are you talking about? Ohh! Ohh! I've fallen and I can't get up!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44247

Deangelo Vickers

Maybe I just need to look into my heart. Deangelo, where is Michael Scott?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44248

Michael

I'm here. In a good way! I've been here the whole time.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44249

Oscar

The analytical part of me wants to examine it, but I know it has no content.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44250

Dwight

Ladies and gentlemen, please stand up for you co-host this evening, Michael Gary Scott. Please remain standing for your other co-host, and new manager, Deangelo Jeremitrius Vickers! Was that part of the...?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44251

Michael

Deangelo, what are you doing? There's a live audience out there!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44252

Deangelo Vickers

Go do it by yourself, get Ryan.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44253

Michael

No, Ryan would never do it. It's too on the radar. Look, look. The boss, hosts, the Dundies! It's sort of our perk!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44254

Deangelo Vickers

This was not, part of the job description!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44255

Michael

Listen to me, you're not doing this for me, you're not doing this for you, you're not even doing this for them!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44256

Deangelo Vickers

Who am I doing this for?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44257

Michael

You're doing this for all those kids out there, eating off the Louie Volpies kid's menu, wondering: Does it get better? What I want you to do, is I want you to say: It's showtime. Get out there.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44258

Deangelo Vickers

I can't.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44259

Michael

Say it.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44260

Deangelo Vickers

Stop, hitting me.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44261

Michael

You can do it, just say it.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44262

Deangelo Vickers

Hit me again.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44263

Michael

Now hit me. One, two, three.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44264

Together

It's showtime.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44265

Michael

Alright, here we go.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44266

Michael

Okay! Okay! Sorry about the delay everybody! But we were at the DMV waiting in line.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44267

Deangelo Vickers

Fall asleep right after sex. Huh guys?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44268

Jim

Nope, go back to the script.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44269

Michael

There are a lot of great salesmen in this office, but one of our great salesmen is also a great dad. And a close personal friend of mine, Jim Halpert! Best Dad Dundie!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44270

Jim

Wow! I do not parent for the award but I gotta tell you It feels pretty good. Uh, Cece, if you're watching this at home it's way past your bedtime, by the way how'd this get televised?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44271

Michael

Well done.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44272

Jim

I don't know maybe being a good dad is just all in your own compass. I don't know, I don't know. Thank you!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44273

Michael

Alright.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44274

Pam

You didn't think to mention me huh?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44275

Jim

Didn't I?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44276

Michael

Which moves us to, Best Mom Dundie. I guess we all kinda consider her a mom around the office. Meredith Palmer!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44277

Meredith

Tell ya one thing, I'm not gonna be a good mom tonight! Whooo!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44278

Dwight

Excuse me, can I get a photo of the Best Mom and the Best Dad please?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44279

Jim

I gotta go do this.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44280

Pam

Why?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44281

Dwight

Big smiles folks! There they are.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44282

Michael

Year after year, I catch a lot of flak on this particular award, because year after year I present this award to a guy instead of a girl. Hottest in the office goes to, Danny Cordray! Danny couldn't be here tonight...

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44283

Ryan

How do I feel about not winning Hottest in the Office this year? Uhm, I'm very relieved. How do you, how do you judge something like that? What is the criteria even? It's, it's so subjective.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44284

Michael

Stanley Hudson is a grump, everybody knows that. But did you know, that Stanley Hudson is also the face of a debilitating disease known as diabetes. The Diabetes Award goes to Stanley Hudson! Come on up here you sick bastard.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44285

Phyllis

I have diabetes too. You don't see me making a big deal about it.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44286

Deangelo Vickers

They say he's going to be my right hand man, adlib masturbation joke. No, I hate this, I hate it so much. Dwight Schrute! Please accept this promising Assistant Manager Dundie. Thank you, thank you so much. I would like to thank something that we, uh, take for granted in our daily lives. And that is the humble trashcan. This is for you trashcan!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44287

Manager

Who gave you those crayons?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44288

Kevin

I brought them from home! Do you have a red?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44289

Manager

This is a cloth tablecloth! You can't color on it!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44290

Kevin

Oh really? [camera shows that Kevin has drawn a house on the tablecloth.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44291

Michael

You know, herpes affects one in five sexually active adults? Pippy Longstocking, Ronald McDonald's wife, Ron Howard, Ron Weasley, what do thay all have in common? Red heads. Erin Hannon, come on up here and receive your Cutest Red Head in the Office Award!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44292

Meredith

That is bull!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44293

Erin

Thank you, thank you! This is the first award I've ever won in my entire life. People are right about the Dundies, they are magical. But, I don't feel it. And I think that's because I'm not with the right person. Gabe, we should break up.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44294

Gabe

What?

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44295

Erin

I'm not attracted to you. I just, I cringe when you talk. I have to be honest. Right, right Pam? Thank you for hearing me.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44296

Gabe

Well, this is embarrassing, um, I'm obviously really angry at Erin. It's that quarter life crisis everyone's been talking about. Alright I'm gonna go.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44297

Michael

There you go.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44298

Darryl

Damn that was cold.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44299

Michael

It is difficult to recognize the person who will be replacing you. But he is a good guy, so the Michael Scott Award for Best Dundies Host goes to Deangelo Vickers.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44300

Audience

Speech! Speech! Speech! Speech!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44301

Deangelo Vickers

Hold on, hold on one second. I WANNA, I WANNA, I FEEL TRULY BLESSED! UHHH, TO BE WORKING WITH ALL OF YOU! BEFORE THIS ALL STARTED, FUNNY STORY, I WAS IN THE BATHROOM, VOMITTING, AND VOMITTING IN THE MEN'S ROOM!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44302

Manager

Okay, okay.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44303

Deangelo Vickers

THAT'S WHY IT'S BEEN SHUT DOWN FOR MOST OF THE EVENING...

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44304

Michael

Deangelo is expressing himself.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44305

Deangelo Vickers

This is truly special, for me! And uh, anyway. It's so much lighter!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44306

Michael

Okay, we're done! That's it.

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44307

Deangelo Vickers

Michael, are we?!

Season 7 · Episode 20 · Line 44308

"Michael's Last Dundies" Quotes (page 2)